


Can't Get Rid of You

by gatergirl79



Series: Camino Palmero [3]
Category: Sons of Anarchy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Angst, Drinking, Drugs, Established Relationship, Kozik's name in this story is Benjamin, M/M, No Beta, Past Relationship(s), Previously on Fan Fiction.Net, Season 4 reworking, relationship stress
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-27
Updated: 2015-02-07
Packaged: 2018-02-27 04:01:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 17
Words: 43,789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2678243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gatergirl79/pseuds/gatergirl79
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Well, back for season four. Tig is out of prison and can't wait to catch up with Kozik. But what starts out as a heated welcome home, turns more serious as the pair have to face the future and their feelings. Will Tig be able to admit his true feelings for Kozik before it's too late. . Spoilers: Season four. Slash M/M loving. NO BETA.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry you had to wait so long for this story to be posted. Previously posted on Fan Fiction.Net
> 
> WARNINGS: This is total slash, so if you have a problem with it turn back now. AND if you are UNDER 18, naughty, naughty. 
> 
> Beta: None. WILL have spelling and grammar mistakes. (Please don't complain as I've just warned you.) 
> 
> Sex: Over all Yes - Male/Male (but none in this chapter.)
> 
> Swearing: Absolutely. (This is sons of anarchy) Along with some derisive terms that aren't meant to offend. 
> 
> Title: Taken from the song: Growing on Me by The Darkness.
> 
> Well, I'm back with the season four opener, continuing on from Sweet Denial. I've taken some liberties with the US prison system. Being English I have no idea what's allowed or not allowed. I know Jax had a single cell, but I wanted to put juice back in that awkward spot with Tig (because it's always fun) so had to stick them in the same cell. I hope you enjoy this knew story. Though it will probably be more PWP than deep in-depth character analysis, but I'm sure you won't mind that all too much right, anyway, on with the show.

Tig sat on his bunk waiting anxiously to get the hell out of there. Fourteen months was a long time to be cut off from everything you cared about and even longer when there was unfinished business awaiting your attention. He'd had a lot of time to think over the past year and most of those thoughts were taken up by the blue eyes blond he'd left behind.

Of course he never let the others know just how much of his time was spent replaying their last night together or imagine just how he was going to celebrate his release. The only member of his brothers that knew the extent of his obsession was Juice, and only because they've been forced to share a cell over the past four months.

His foot swung and bounced with impatience as time dragged on.

"Jesus man, calm down." Juice grumbled from the bottom bunk.

Tig swung his leg side ways to connect with the young Puerto Ricans head.

"Hey!" the boy snapped shooting off his bunk. "Jesus, if there's one thing I won't miss when we get the hell out of here, it's your…..nervous twitches." he said with frustration.

Tig laughed at the innuendo. "Aww how sweet, I told Tommy you'd miss him."

Juice glared dangerously at the older man as he continued to laugh. He hadn't gone without his fair share of attention over the past fourteen months, Tommy being just the latest.

"Your such a fucker Tig." Juice snapped, pressing his back to the wall opposite.

"Oh, I thought you were a lover not a hater." he winked.

"Shut the fuck up. You know damn fucking well nothing happened." Juice huffed.

Tig raised a disbelieving brow that caused the tanned youth to turn red, while flipping him off and heading back to his bunk, where he dropped down with a huff.

"Oh, come on Juice, we've all need a bit of stress relief."

"Not me!" he snapped a little too quickly. "Or Jax."

Tig rolled his eyes and fell back into a lying potion on the top bunk, hands behind his head. "Yeah, well….Jax is….Jax." he smirked.

Tig laughed, it was always so easy to fluster Juicy, especially on this subject. The young man had been wary around Tig ever since the day of their arrest when he'd inadvertently interrupted him and Kozik. Tig was sure that he thought he was going to jump him any second. He'd even caught him sleeping with his back to the wall and his hand covering his gonads. Tig had increased the innuendos and teasing after that, and hadn't been so discreet at night when he lay in his bed, his hand around his dick, reacting from the memory of a rather graphic phone call or an equally smutting letter. Not bothering to stifle the man's name as he came.

**~TIKOZI~**

It was the perfect morning for a welcome home, the sun beaming brightly over California. It was peaceful with a buzz in the air. Kozik tried not to allow the excitement to take a hold of him. After all, a year was a long time and a few dirty letters and phone calls didn't really make up for eight years of hostility. For all he knew Tig would walk out of those gates and everything would be back to snipping and punching each other. Or maybe Tig would be fine with him, even be okay with him patching in but wouldn't want to continue what they'd started over a year ago.

The nervous fear of that had been eating away at him all week. And he knew he hadn't done a practically good job at hiding it.

"You okay boy-o." Chibs asked from the bike on his right.

"Fine. - Just hate all this waiting around." He replied, trying to sound calm. They both knew what was making him jumpy. Hell, the whole club knew, but actually admitting it would be the death of his respect as a son. They'd start treating him like a chick or worse a fucking queer.

The club were fine with him and Tig, more or less - they always had been - surprising, as long as they kept it behind closed doors and didn't fag out in front of them. Kozik had always been a little amazed it wasn't among the founding rules of the SOA, along with the no blacks rule, but then maybe the illustrious John Teller and the first nine hadn't expected a guy who liked bikes, beer and pussy, to also have a licking for dick too, lucky for him and Tig.

"It shouldn't be long now." Chibs said, pulling him from his thoughts.

Kozik nodded and stared down at his bike. He looked to his right as the movement of Chibs shifting caught his attention. He wasn't the only one anxious to see a fellow member. Kozik had figured quickly that Chibs had kind of a soft spot for the young Puerto Rican. They were pretty close, almost inseparable at times, though probably not in the same way as him and Tig. - Though you never really knew, and Chibs had been apprehensive about his safety practically the whole time he was inside.

They were sat there in the sun, outside Stockton prison for at least another hour, when the sound of distant doors opening and closing drew their attention. Kozik's heart leapt into his throat and he couldn't keep the grin off his face at the sight of Tig walking confidently towards the gate. It was moments like this when he wished he could openly admit to his feeling and act on them. Instead he cheered with the others and waiting for the gates to open.

Kozik grinned smuggle as Tig headed towards him, turning to display his patch with a slight wriggle of his body, a wicked mischievous gleam in his eye as Tug paused in front of him, his hands on his hips and a wide smile on his face. Once more Kozik's heart skipped and he took a breath.

"I knew you'd vote in when I was gone, you pussy." he scolded with a laugh.

Kozik's grin widened laughing along with the sergeant before moving to a tight welcoming an embrace. They weren't the only ones hugging so it didn't break the no-PDA rule, but it felt a thousand times better than the hugs being exchanged behind them.

Pulling apart they looked at each other for a second before Kozik handed over Tig's cut, giving him a warm promising smile and heading back to his bike.

**~TIKOZI~**

The welcome home was much like it always was cheers and welcome. Hugs from member and friend, kisses from practically every croweater in the lot. Tig took it all with his usual enthusiasm. He caught sight of Kozik a few feet away with a leggy blonde wrapped around him and fought off the surge of jealousy that coursed thought him.

He knew Kozik hadn't been a god-damned saint, any more that he had, men had needs. But Tig couldn't ignore the grip of possessiveness that took hold. Kozik met his gaze and understanding passed between them. Tig gave the man a slight nodded and heading over to talk to Gemma and Chuck, laughing as if there hadn't been that intense moment, knowing things with Kozik would be settled as soon as things with the Club where. Clay called everyone to Chapel and Tig went eagerly, figuring the quicker they got the official shit over, the sooner he could get back to his place and make up for lost time.

**~TIKOZI~**

"So will I see you later?" the nameless blonde asked, pressing herself against the muscles body.

Kozik tore his gaze away from Tig as he moved away from the crowd. He's seen the green-eyed monster in those blue eyes and it had sent a spark of desire straight to his dick. Looking down at the blonde croweater he'd been fucking on and off for the past few months, he saw the sparkle in her eyes as she jumped to the conclusion that the bulge in his pants was down to her.

He felt a slight stab of guilt for using her the way he had, but then, that's what came with being a groupie. The lucky ones got promoted to old lady status, but all in all, they spent most of their lives attending to the need of any member free to be with them, until they were too old to gain a Son's attention.

Giving her one of his brilliant award winning smiles, Kozik shook his head. "Not tonight Honey."

Her face dripped and her brows furrowed as she stared up at him with confusion. He hadn't made her any promises but she was young and new and in hindsight maybe she hadn't been the best choice to get him though the year.

He pressed an apologetic kiss to her lips, untangled himself from her arms and headed for the club house, her eyes burning into his patch all the way.


	2. Chapter 2

What was meant to be a quick sit down to catch up with what's going down in Charming swiftly turning into a two and a half hour mission to distract the tail the new Sherriff had put on their arse's, which had almost landed a couple of them in hospital, the morgue or worse back in prison. Tig had really prayed that wasn't going to be the case. At least not until he'd fucked Kozik. - Though if the young blond got sent down to, they could always do it behind bars. That thought had Tig hard in seconds and he had to force himself to concentrate of not getting run off the road by the bastard police officer.

Once the officers had been ordered to let them go, much too all their delight, Tig headed back to his place, Kozik close behind. Before he went inside he'd been staying most of the time at the club house, but for what he had in mind he wanted a level of privacy that the club just didn't afford them. They had a few hours before they had to be at the reservation for Opie's wedding, more than enough time to catch-up.

Tig pulled into his drive way, swing his leg over his bike and grinning at the blond biker pulling to a stop just behind him. His whole body was humming with excitement and lust as he walked at a swift pace to the front door, pushing it open with a glance over his shoulder to assure that Kozik was following him.

As he stepped over the threshold an exhilarating buzz in his veins he turned back to regard his home and froze. He took a few more steps inside, his gaze scanning the mess. Bottles, papers, jeans and boots. His first impression had been that he'd been turned over, but that was clearly not the case. Taking a full note of the items, Tig swung around to glare at the blond behind him, the man's face wrinkled in a regretful wince.

"Shit, I asked Honey to clean the place up." he remarked calmly.

Tig's glare hardened. "You've been crashing here?"

Kozik shrugged nonchalantly. "Made sense. It wasn't like you were going to be needing it." he gave a sexy crooked grin, which died on his lips almost as quickly as he was born.

They stood staring at each other for a long moment. Tig's blue eyes darkening, storm and dangerous. Kozik was unsure if he was more pissed at the fact he'd been staying there or that he'd left the place looking like it had been visited by ATF.

"Well you know what you can fucking do, don't you?" Tig snapped.

Kozik's insides gripped tight, was Tig going to make him leave, move out. Where they not going to have sex? He wouldn't say so to the man but he'd kind of hoped to stay for a while. They could be flat-mates, Tig had a spare room. Though Kozik kinda hoped he wouldn't be staying in it often, if ever.

"You can tidy this shit up." Tig concluded harshly, pulling Kozik out of his day dream.

"What? Now?"

"Damn right, now!" the older man snapped, kicking furiously at a pile of dirty cloths.

Kozik stood still for a moment, scanning the debris of the past few days. He couldn't think why Honey hadn't done as he'd asked. She was probably pissed at him about not taking her to the wedding, and he hadn't exactly told her this wasn't his place. Probably because he'd stupidly hoped it might be.

"What you waiting for, an instruction manual?" Tig said, his hands resting casually on his hips.

The blond plastered his most charming and flirtatious smile on his face and strolled determinedly forward, his eyes locked with Tig's. Stepping into the man's personal space, he slightly by the smallest amount towered over him. There was barely any room for air between them as Kozik cupped the older man though his jeans, giving him a gentle squeeze. Tig barely even flinched.

Kozik didn't allow Tig's lack of response to put him off, it was a familiar dance. He dropped his head, scrapping his teeth up the man's neck and biting slightly at the pulse point that throbbed against his lips. After the forceful bite he carried on up till he reached the man's ear, his hand continuing to squeeze and rub at the swiftly growing bulge. "You sure you want me to waste time on cleaning." he whispered huskily. "A years a long time Tinkerbell." He smiled thrusting his own erection into the man's hip.

Tig growled, turning his head to capture Kozik's mouth in an open mouthed kiss, his tongue licking its way from lips to teeth and deeper. His hand gripping at the blond's denim covered backside, pulling him closer while grinding into his hand.

Kozik removed his hand, too much protest, replacing it with his hips. Thrusting forward to rut frantically against the darker denim, while his hands pushed the cut and hooding off Tig's powerful shoulders, backing him into a wall with a grunt. Shifting his leg between Tigs's he pressed up harder. The cut and hoodies flew haphazardly across the room to land on the couch. Their mouths barely separating for air and Tig joined the desperate display of clothe removal, thankful Kozik hadn't chosen to wear more than his cut and a tee.

Everything moved impossibly quickly, fuelled by months of separation, both knowing they wouldn't be the only ones making up for lost time before Opie's wedding. Tig was tugging at Kozik's belt and jeans when a sound broke his concentration and the pairs heads shot around towards the bedroom door to see the same blond from earlier stood, wrapped in a bed sheet gaping at them with wide glistening eyes.

No one spoke or moved. Tig's hand were still motionlessly settled on Kozik's jeans, while the blond bikers hand was gripping onto Tig's neck possessively, their bodies pressed together in a heated embrace.

Finally the world started moving again and the probably naked sheet-covered blonde spun around and fled into the bedroom, slamming the door behind her. Tig looked up at his lover with a raised bow.

"Friend of yours?"

Kozik continued to stare at the closed door. He didn't looked amused, he looked guilty. "Just someone I've been….."

"Fucking?" Tig finished matter-of-factly. "Is that all?"

Kozik's head snapped around to stare at the sergeant, looking at his feature's intently. "What's wrong? Jealous?" he smirked despite himself.

Tig straightened, pulling his hands away from the man's waist, glaring at him. "Like fuck, moron. - Just…."

Kozik couldn't help but laugh before slamming his mouth back into Tig's, hard and rough, forcing his head back against the wall with a bang, making them both groan. A sound of disgust interrupted the pair, Kozik tried to pull his moth away but Tig clamped possessively down on his lower lip for a long moment, biting it hard and sending sparks of desire straight to Kozik's dick. When the younger biker finally got his freedom the young woman was rushing out the door, slamming it forcefully, causing the walls and windows to shake. He stared at the exit with a worried and guilt ridden look.

"Nice girl you've got there." Tig remarked, his voice deep, husky and filled with lust.

Kozik's head snapped around, fixing the sergeant with an angry stare. Tig smirked questioningly back at him.

The blond swooped in, reconnecting their lip-lock with breathtaking intensity. Tig laughed into his mouth as he fixed his palms once again to the man's buttocks and pulled him close, grinding into him with renewed vigor. The older man dragging his mouth away long enough to take a breath and speak.

"Y-you should have asked her to stay. The more the merrier." he panted laughingly, before fixing his moth to the tattooed curve of Kozik's throat.

"Like hell, I want you to myself." Kozik growled, his eyes heavy as Tig sucked a mark onto his flesh.

Kozik's insides turned to Jello at the feel of Tig's warm breath on the shell of his ear, then they turned to water when he whispered.

"I'm going to fuck you so hard you won't be able to ride for a month."

It was a promise the man had every intention of keeping, Kozik knew and didn't much care. "Christ yes." he groaned, pressing his erection so hard against Tig they both lost the ability to breathe.


	3. Chapter 3

With a grunt Tig clawed at the blonds tanned skin before forcing him back a few steps. Kozik frowned but went where led only to gasp as the sergeant flipped their positions, shoving him back against the wall with another bang. The sergeant finished the job he'd started on Kozik's jean's, roughly yanking the zipper, ripping at the fastening and then shoving them down his hips, grinning wickedly to see the man had gone commando. "Expecting company?" he chuckled glanced up at Kozik with a raised brow.

The blond shrugged. "Never know when some old slut will want to blow you." he smirked.

Tig slapped at the swollen dick. "What it with the old, dick-brain."

Kozik gasped and groaned, his head dropping back to the wall with his eyes close in ecstasy.

"I forgot you liked it rough." Tig growled, dragging his nails along the underside of Kozik's dick, grinning triumphantly when the younger man all but whimpered.

Tig wrapped his fingers around the swollen member and began to give it coarse hard strokes while he let his eyes scan the muscled tanned physic that he'd never admit to missing. He licked his lips as he caught sight of a tattoo, his heart giving a little shameful flip. He hadn't paid much attention to Kozik's body the last time they were together - besides the necessary parts - it had been dark and they'd been too caught up in lust and anger to care about the small things.

Now though Tig was able to see the ink that had probably been view by a lot of lustful eyes, though he doubted any knew the meaning. He had laughed his arse off when Kozik had gotten it done but as ridiculous and amusing as it had been, it had also been highly erotic, knowing his mark was permanently imbedded on the blond's skin for eternity.

He plastered his hands on the backs of Kozik's legs and shifted forward, blowing hot air over the abandoned erection before dragging his tongue over the small tattoo, almost tasting the ink itself; sure he could feel the inked teeth impression that would, if checked, identify him as their owner. In their center three little words that seemed so fitting. _'Just That Good'_.

With the ink covered in his saliva Tig leveled up his teeth with the mark and bit down. The cry Kozik realised was loud and erotic, the blond's hand dropping to cling desperately to Tig's hair as the sergeant sucked harder on the skin. When he finally pulled away he looked up at Kozik, the man's head resting against the wall, his eyes close and sweat beginning to glisten on his neck and chest.

Tig grinned wickedly as the sight filled his body with desire, his breathing becoming heavy. He was tired of the foreplay; there was enough time for that later. Getting to his feet he took a step back.

Kozik's head shot up from its resting place and his gaze locked with confusion on the other man. When Tig unfastened his jeans and forced them down his toned legs, along with his underwear Kozik bent down to remove his boots and kick off his own jeans.

Once they were both naked they took a moment to appreciate each other's form, until the heat, desire and pure need was too much. Neither knowing who moved first. Mouths crashing against one another, hips snapping to create a delicious friction. Kozik's hands clinging to Tig's bare backside, squeezing the pale orbs and sliding his fingers into the crack, pressing one digit against the tight ring of muscle.

"Let me fuck you." the blond pleaded raggedly, pressing his finger deeper, making Tig's hips jerk. "I need to…." he added at the same moment as a second finger joined the party.

Tig groaned unable to control his desire, let alone his body's reaction. Grunting was all he was capable of at that moment, taking a shaky breathing he pulled away, turning, his internal muscles clamping down on the finger so as not to lose them. He moved slight forward before bending forward, bracing his hands on the coffee table, his arse in the air a clear invitation.

Kozik felt his heart skip and he swallowed hard, working his fingers in and out, waiting for the muscles to relax, then it hit him they would need protection. Tig had spent the past year plus in prison and he wasn't a fool, he knew the man wouldn't have gone without, and he'd been with a few girls in that time too. Grunting with annoyance, because it was also so fucking good going bareback, Kozik leant forward, wrapping an arm around Tig, his hand flat against his chest, savoring the pounding of his heart, forcing him up right. "Not here." he grunted against the man's shoulder.

"Bedrooms too far." Tig insisted, once again clamping tight around the digits.

Kozik let out a strangled groan. "Couch."

It took some maneuvering to get to the couch with Tig refusing to release Kozik's hand. Once they reached the battered sofa the blond turned them so he could sit, with one hand still occupied he reach for the end table with his free one, grinning as Tig let out a deep lustful moan of delight.

"Hurry the hell up!" the man snapped between moans.

"Just a minute, I'm just uh…" he pulled the silver packet out of the drawer. "…you've got to….uh, let go…"

Tig grunted a refusal and reached around for the silver packet. As the older man ripped at the foil Kozik curved his finger, hitting the sweet spot and making the man's hips jerk and pant.

The blond eased back against the couch cushions as Tig turned his body, whining as the action dislodged Kozik's hand. He dropped to his knees, his mouth on the blond's dick, sucking him hard before pulling back and rolling the condom into place. With his other hand he yanked a couch cushion onto the floor beside him, shoving the coffee table out of the way.

With the rubber in place, he smirked up at the blond with a gaze filled of hunger, causing Kozik to shift forward, his finger curling into the man's dark hair to drag him into an open-mouthed kiss, forcing him back onto the cushion. Their mouth was still glued together; he heaved Tig's tones left leg over his shoulder, lifting his hips off the cushion.

Angling himself and Tig, before thrusting deep with a grunt. Tig's head falling back to bare his throat that rumbled, his Adam's apple bobbing. Kozik's fingers bit into the thick thigh as he snapped his hips roughly in a quick barrage of movements. The blond hit Tig's spot every time, causing the man to cry out with a hoarse voice.

Tig's fingers clung to the cushion beneath him, his other feet braced against the floor, giving him purchase, allowing him to lift himself to push back onto the invading muscle. Sweat quickly coating both men's bold muscles frames. Kozik grunting out noise that were probably words in his head, Tig's coming out fully formed.

"Fuuuck. Harder. For fuuuck sake…Harder!" he yelled and Kozik complied. "Ahh, Jesus…" the man reached up to drag the man down the blond, not kissing him but sinking his teeth into the join of his neck and shoulder. Biting down and sucking hard. His hand wrapped around his own dick, pumping hard in time with the blonds thrusts, till he let out a strangled cry against Kozik's neck, spilling all over his fingers and stomach.

Kozik followed a few thrusts later, as Tig's internal muscles clenched around him. "T…..Aleeeexxxx!" the blond yelled loudly before falling forward over the older man panting, his body slick with sweat and Tig's cum smearing over his stomach.

Drawing himself free a few moments later, Kozik rolled onto his back and caught his breath. Removing the condom, knotting it and throwing it in the vague direction of the trashcan, before relaxing with his eyes closed.

"That was…I'm missed that." he murmured breathlessly.

"It was alright." Tig replied deadpan, staring up at the ceiling.

"Well, thanks." the blond huffed.

"Now clean my fucking living room up." Tig ordered, his eyes closing and his arm dropping to cover them.

"What?" Kozik frowned.

Tig didn't answer, just waved his arm in the direction of the mess.

"Are you serious?"

"I'm always fucking serious. - And if you expect us to go again, you'll do as I say."

Kozik stared down at the sweat and cum soaked sergeant with wide disbelieving eyes for a long while. "And you're just going to….lay here?"

Tig grunted. Kozik grumbled under his breath as he got to his feet, looking for his clothes. The sergeant peeking out from under his arm.

"Leave the clothes, no point getting dressed just to have to strip once you've finished."

Kozik turned, standing slightly off kilt as was his way, his arms hanging at his side. "You want me to do this naked?"

Tig grinned finally.

"Well, you're going to have to get the hell off the floor, I'm not cleaning around you." the blond huffed, turning toward the mess.

Tig dragged himself reluctantly off the floor, dropped the cushion back on the couch, before falling on it himself. He sat there watching Kozik move around the room, grumbling under his breath as he picked up bottles and magazines, jeans and boots. Feeling all the while Tig's eyes burning into his backside, and catching sight of him with his hand around his dick.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry the chapters are so short but thanks for reading 
> 
> Okay so you remember I said this would probably be PWP, well actually as I'm writing I'm thinking this will actually have a plot. And one you may not like very much as I'm going to cover the whole of season four in one story. At least from Tig/Kozik POV. This mean's it will have spoiler's for what happens to Kozik midseason. Which also means the category has been changed to Romance/Angst. But don't worry the end of this story doesn't mean the end for my Tikozi-ness, I love writing them too much and I have a story involving Dawn that just won't fit in here, so it'll be a stand alone AU and I may even do an AU where what happens in the show doesn't happen. Just to make me and everyone happy.


	4. Chapter 4

By the time Kozik had the living once tidied Tig had already headed for the bedroom. - After messing up the couch cushions with his jiz, which he was also ordered clean up. - He strolled into the bedroom, still naked despite the fact Tig had been out of the room over half an hour and his jeans were right there. He paused at the door to the stare at Tig, lying stretched out, asleep.

Folding his arms over his chest he lent back against the wooden frame and just watched him. He knew it was either completely stalkerish or just plain girlie, but he couldn't help himself, any more than he could help the fact that his stomach flipped and his heart skipped a beat, or that his breath had caught in his lungs when Tig had walked out of Stockton and headed straight for him.

Pushing himself off the frame with a smile Kozik moved quietly across the room, not wanting to wake him. He knew what it was like in prison, you never really ever sleep, always aware if the threat that lurks. It usually took a few days to readjust to the outside, to stop expecting someone to shove a piece of plastic between your ribs. He was actually amazed that Tig hadn't already shot up in bed with his gun pointed at him.

Kozik shifted onto the bed as gently as his large frame could manage, not wanting to wake the sleeping man and get punched in the face. He settled back against the pillow and stared across the room at the blank wall. Maybe he should have stayed in the den and watched TV or take a shower.

He glanced at the night stand clock and saw they still have hours before the wedding. A shower was most definitely a good idea, his skin still clammy with dried sweat. Then he might follow Tig's lead and take a nap, especially as the party was likely to go on most of the night.

He was just shifting towards the edge of the mattress when Tig's deep mumbled caught him. He turned to look over his shoulder to see the man still asleep, despite his lips moving. Kozik had not idea Tig spoke in his sleep, but then a lot can change in nine years. He smiled slightly to himself and moved to get up.

"Oh yeah. That's it….right there." Tig moaned huskily.

Kozik looked back at him with a wide grin.

"Huh, uh, har…harder. Yeah. Jesus."

Kozik swallowed the sound turning him on, unable to take his eyes of Tig. Of course the man would be dreaming about sex, other than the club it was what he loved most in life. He was probably getting blow my some dream girl.

"Faster." he groaned and Kozik shifted closer on the bed, his tongue running over his lower lip. "Jesus, ba….yah ba-by….uh, uh…..oh….da…Danny."

Kozik froze over the older man, his heart leaping into his throat, pounding painfully, his mouth falling open. So he knew he wasn't the only guy Tig slept with, and after nine years there was probably a list. But hearing it, having a name, that…

"Oh god….you're so good." Tig continued to moan, arching his back off the bed. "Best…e-ever."

Kozik swallowed and moved away, sitting on the edge of the bed. Yeah, that most definitely hurt. He turned his head to stare at the opposite wall and took a deep shaky breath, a couple actually. He told himself to pull it together, it wasn't like he was the love of Tig's life or his old lady or some shit, They were just fuck buddies, it was just sex, it had always been just sex. Sex Tig was free to have with other people.

Kozik dropped his head into his hands and tried to breath, fighting back the foolish chick-like feeling that where making tears burn at the back of his eyes and throat, as well as the sharp ache in his chest. For the first time in over a year he wished he never returned to Charming.

"Man you're such a pussy." Tig's voice laughing behind him. "Maybe I should stop fucking you like a chick if you're gonna start acting like one."

Kozik froze at the words. It had been a wind up he realised. Tig hadn't been talking in his sleep, he hadn't been asleep, and he'd done it to get a reaction. And to his shame, Kozik had given the most embarrassing reaction he could; he'd gotten teary and heartbroken like a fucking teenage girl. God what the hell was wrong with him?

The anger that flooded him was more at himself than the man behind him. While he'd always known his feelings for the Samcro Sergeant ran deep, he hadn't allowed himself to actually commit to them. He'd been able to ignore the jealousy of seeing Tig with women, because that's how they were, it came with the patch, the guns and the bikes. And he could deal with that. As for the other guys, the one's he'd doubtlessly been with in prison, well, he'd kinda buried his head in the sand on that one, not wanting to face it. But the fact that he'd been so jealous and hurt - mostly hurt - at another guy's name on Tig's lips, kinda hit Kozik like an eighteen wheeler truck.

He knew what he did next would dictate how Tig treated him from then on. He could shout like the chick the sergeant was accusing him of being, he could turn around and hit the man. Which at that moment was the strongest instinct in Kozik. Or he could do nothing. He chose that option. Getting up as he'd planned, he laughed, told Tig he was a "Vein bastard." and heading for the bathroom, not once looking back at the man.

He closed the door calmly, turned on the shower calmly and got under the hot water, letting it rain down and cover his face. It slightly burnt his skin but he didn't care, he savored it. Swallowing back lump after lump he called himself every name he could think of. Told himself he needed to grow a pair, that this should end, now, before he made a bigger fool of himself. That's when the calm faded and the anger resurfaced. His smashed his hand into the side of the shower, sucking in a breath as the bone hit the tiles. It repeated the action again, and again.

"What the fucking hell are you doing?" Tig snapped, yanking back the curtain and staring at the blond with furious eyes, water splashing over his body.

Kozik turned to look at him with shame, glancing down at his bruised knuckles, small bleeding scratches that if he had continued would become gapping wounds. He clenched his jaw unable to speak. What was he meant to say? Tig's only rule was it was just sex, how could he tell him that it wasn't that for him? That it never had been. - That it was the reason he hadn't been able to commit properly to the girl in Tacoma, or any girl for that matter.

Tig was staring at him with concern and anger, looking between his face and his hand. "Well?"

Kozik shook his head and turned back to the water, letting it run down his face. His wounded hand stinging as it hung at his side.

**~TIKOZI~**

Tig left him to it, heading back to his room and falling onto the bed, staring at the wall, clenching his jaw. Confused by Kozik's reaction to his wind-up, it wasn't like the guy didn't know he spelt with others and what did it have to do with him anyways, the moron wasn't his old lady. The rules didn't apply to him, - And if they did there was the prison rule that cleared both their conscience's.

The sergeant leapt off the bed and stormed from the room to the kitchen, yanking open the fridge and retrieving the bottle of beer. Downing it in one, he reached for another. He leant back against the counter, a fear beginning to gnaw at his gut. Had thing between him and Kozik taken a turn he couldn't afford? If it had, what was he meant to do now? _End it obviously_. His mind said and his stomach lurched. Of course he had to end it. Sex was sex, but this was beginning to feel like more and that just couldn't happen. The club was alright was alright with the casual hook-ups he doubted they'd feel the same way if they began to be serious - not that that was an option.

Tig liked his life just as it was, he didn't do well with commitment, just ask his ex-wife. And he was never going to commit to a guy, he wasn't a queer, he just liked the sex.

He suddenly realised that he hadn't drank any of his beer in a while and took a long drew, then heard movement in the other room and his breath caught, causing him to almost choke of the alcohol. He just stood there, his heart pounding in his chest painfully. He listened intently to the sounds from the other room, feeling ridiculously at odds with himself. Part of him wanting to go in there and clear up whatever was going on, put the guy in his place, while another part of him wasn't too walk out the door, head to the club house and ignore all of it until it just went away. The second wasn't really an option as he was still naked. As for the first option he didn't think he was ready to face the man just yet.

Sadly that was taken out of his hands as Kozik strolled out of the bedroom, fully dressed, Tig looked up at him and tightened his jaw at the ache the filled his chest at the blankness of his features. The blond strolled into the kitchen, not so much as looking at the naked man, he pulled open the freezer and pushed his bruised hand inside, allowing the ice to cold the wounded muscle. A few minutes later he closed the freeze and retrieved a bottle from the fridge. Tig watching him silently the whole times. Kozik stood in front of the fridge staring down at the bottle in his busted hand, breathing nervously, the atmosphere thick with unsaid things.

Finally Kozik turned away and headed for the room, into the lounge, towards the door. Tig marching after him.

"Where you going?" the sergeant asked.

Kozik paused at the door. "I'll see you at the wedding." he murmured.

Tig grunted angrily. "Fine." turning, heading back to the bedroom.

Kozik glanced over his shoulder to see the man vanish, taking a deep breath he opened the door and headed out the door, unsure just wear he was going to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again sorry about the shortness of the chapter. I'll try and get you another as quick as I can, but as I said, I have no patience and started posting almost the moment I started writing. Bad Bad me. 
> 
> One thing before I go, I was thinking that us SOA slash fan aren't really represented in the wider world on sites like Tumblr or DeviantART. (At least from what I can see.) It's a shame really. I've been introduced to the SOA_Slash community on LiveJournal, (thank you soul1essharpy) but that's all I can really find. If you have any Tig/Kozik or Juice/Chibs – Or any SOA Slash on Tumblr or DeviantART could you please either send me the link or Tag Tikozi, Chibuicy or SOA Slash on Tumblr as I'm feeling kinda alone in the world right now with my son's slash. I really want so see some art if any one's go some. Maybe even 
> 
> Anyway, thank you so much for reading and I really will try and get you a chapter ASAP. – As soon as I figure out how to fix their little fight.


	5. Chapter 5

Chibs and Juice were stood beside the pool table in the club house, Chibs smirking as the Puerto Rican missed his shot before he gave into temptation and laughed.

"Jesus Boy-o, your games gone ta hell, guess ya where playing with the wrong kinda ball inside." Chibs chucked taking his shot.

Juice stiffened for a moment before plastering a false smile on his face and chuckling when the Scotsman missed. He turned his head at the sound of footsteps and frowned as Kozik marched into the club house looking like he'd just ran over some kinda puppy. Juice glanced up to see Chibs features mirroring his own. Confusion and concern. Neither man figuring they wouldn't see either Tig or Kozik till the wedding in a couple of hours. The fact that Kozik was sat alone at the bar nursing a beer was cause for concern.

Juice took his shot blindly and by a fluke actually pocketed a ball. Chibs laughed, though his features were still tense. The young man strolled around the table and paused next to his friend, lifting his bottle of beer from the nearby table. "What do you think that's about?"

Chibs brows knotted together and he shrugged, his gaze locked on the man at the bar. "Don't know, but it doesn't look good."

"Lovers tiff." Juice murmured with a smirk.

The Scotsman looked down at the boy and returned the grin with a little laugh.

"Ya gonna to talk to him?" Juice asked moving to make his shot.

"Why me?" Chibs frowned.

Juice looked up from the table. "Cause you're the touch feely type." he deadpanned. "Besides, there's no one else around." Juice took his shot and missed.

"You're here."

"I've heard more than I ever wanted to about their….whatever, in prison. Have you ever shared a cell with Tig?" he shuddered and Chibs nodded understandingly. "Now it's your turn." Juice smirked nodded to Kozik.

The Scotsman didn't move, not at first. Juice watched him and he watched Juice, then with a roll of his eyes and a dramatic sigh he dropped his cue of the table, ending the game, and marched over to the blond. He grabbed a beer and dropped onto the stool next to Kozik. He just sat there silently, staring across the bar, not looking at the man. The blond shifted on his seat and took a long gulp of his drink and didn't look at Chibs. The silence stretched between them until Chibs couldn't take it anymore.

"What he do?"

Kozik looked down at his bottle and shook his head. "Nothing." he murmured.

Chibs still wasn't looking at him, if he was having this conversation he couldn't look at his brother. "He always doesn't somethin."

Kozik remained silent, he wanted to talk, wanted to ask Chibs advice but to do that he'd have to confess what had happened and he couldn't do that. So he rubbed at his head and repeated. "Nothing."

Chibs caught sight of his friend's busted hand. "What the fuck happened?" he snapped, turning in his seat to stare at the man next to him, his voice no longer carrying that casual tone.

The blond glanced over and Chibs nodded at his red swollen knuckles. Kozik sucked in a breathed as he realised he was going to get asked by everyone. His heart raced and he tightened his jaw, shrugging. "Nothing."

The Scotsman huffed with frustration and glared at him. Leaping off his seat he gripped the blonds cut and practically dragged him off the stool and towards Chapel. Passing a worried looking Juice, he shoved Kozik through the door and closed it behind him. Chapel was the most private place in the club and no one interrupted when the doors were closed. Chibs pushed Kozik into the seat he'd been occupying over the past fourteen months, Tig's seat, and stood awkwardly to the side, his arms folded over his chest.

"Okay boy-o, this is the only time we're havin this conversation, okay. Once we leave it never happened. Agreed." he said in a heavily accented rumble.

Kozik stared at the table top, his fingers playing nervously over the wood.

"So? What the fuck happened?" Chibs pressed.

The blond was silent still, mainly because he had no idea himself. One minute everything was fine the next he was acting like a clingy old lady. He heard Chibs huff impatiently and knew he had to give him something. "Really, nothing happened. - Just a misunderstanding." he all but whispered.

"You two get into it?" Chibs frowned, pulling up his chair. "I thought you'd at least last twenty four hours."

"No." Kozik shook his head, rubbing at his knuckles with his thumb. "It was with the shower wall." he laughed, trying to sound lighthearted. Chibs was still frowning. "I - It…." he shook his head, unable to do it.

Chibs shifted around, leaning back in his chair, his right arm resting on the table top and lowered his voice to an almost whisper. "Let's pretend your talkin about a bird okay. You're old lady. - What she do?"

Kozik swallowed. It sounded good, except he was the old lady in this scenario. - But if it helped him get straight in the head, if Chibs had advice for him, then he'd do it. Swallowing against, he took a breath and slumped down in the chair. - Tig's chair. "It….I heard _her_ calling this guy's name in _her_ sleep and I….freaked. - I know what h… _she_ does, what _she'_ _s_ like, it shouldn't have bothered me. I mean it's not like we….it's just sex." He insisted, more to convince himself than his friend.

There was a long silent pause as Chibs tried to figure out just what to say, what advice to give. He thought he had something when Kozik jumped in.

"I don't know how Opie does it?" the blond sighed warily.

Chibs shrugged. "I guess because he loves Lyla." the Scotsman murmured.

A crackling tension descended as Chibs words registered with both men. Kozik knew how he felt about Tig, had known a long time. And he knew the sergeant didn't feel the same. He'd meant it when he'd said it was just sex….at least as far as Tig was concerned. "What if that's the problem." he whispered before he could stop himself.

The tension increased and he fixed his gaze on the oak table, seeing Chibs move uncomfortably in his seat. _Maybe this hadn't been such a good idea after all_. Both men thought.

"He's never going to change Boy-o. It's not just who he is, it's who we all are." the Scotsman sighed warily, rubbing at his eyes. "Normal isn't what we do. There are things expected, thing that make our live difficult. The club, Clay and the others, they ignore you and Tig because they figure it's just you guys being, well….it's just sex."

"It _is_ just sex." Kozik insisted unconvincingly. "At least…."

"Tig's not the commitment type, that's why…."

"He's fucking me." the blond learning further into the table. "Yeah."

Chibs was silent for a moment. "I think you really need to think about what you're doin boy-o? Whether you're willing to carry on like this, cause if you're wanting…." the Scotsman swallowed and shifted. "….more, you might want to…..find somewhere else."

Kozik looked at the Scotsman with knowing and pained eyes. "Away from the club." he mumbled.

Chibs shrugged. "We're allowed to get away with a lot of shit, as long as it doesn't affect the club."

"And us being…..would affect the club." he nodded.

"Can you seriously imagine it not?" Chibs grumbled, pulling his cigarettes out of his pocket. "We're not exactly the pride parade types." he laughed dryly, lifting the white stick to his lips and lighting it, taking a deep drag. "Believe me, I know it's hard…." he paused for another drag. "…but it's just the way it is. The clubs dictates everything, even our….love lives. - You knew that when you signed up."

Kozik stared down at his hands, finding it ridiculous that a member could marry a junkie or a porn star, but heaven forbid they would want to marry another man, not that he wanted to marry Kozik. "Yeah, but that was almost ten years ago, I had no idea then what he was going to do to me." he mumbled. "Then, it really was just sex."

Chibs puffed away on his cigarette, flicking the ash into an ashtray. "Listen Koz, I wish I could tell you that it's all just fine, that Tig's gonna come round, that you and him could do whatever you wanted without trouble from the club, that we could be throwing a big queer wedding at some point. But the truth is, none of that's gonna happen. So you're just going to have to figure out if you can deal with it just being sex, with Tig fucking anything that moves - or doesn't in some cases….." he smirked. "….if you can't, then maybe now's the time to get out."

The blond stared down at the table top, knowing Chibs was right, as always. He closed his eyes and rubbed at them. He had no idea what he was going to do, how he was going to deal with any of this shit. – Or how the hell he'd gotten so fucking deep in the first place. "Maybe I should have stayed in Tacoma?" he mumbled with a life wary sigh.

Chibs didn't say anything; he just pushed back his chair and got to his feet. His hand falling heavily on his brother's shoulder. Understanding and sympathetic. Kozik heard the door open and close, feeling no better now than he had when Chibs had dragged him into the room. In fact he probably felt worse.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember people, this story covering the whole of season four (Tikozi wise) which means I changed the categories to Romance/Angst. (As they don't have tragedy.)

Kozik sat on his bike staring at the front of the house. He really didn't want to go inside but he had little choice, all his clothes and shit were in there because he'd been an idiot. He'd been thinking he could live with Tig, but the club wouldn't turn a blind eye to that, of course they wouldn't. Chibs was right, they could get away with only so much. So he'd decided he'd move back to the club until he found somewhere permanent. - That hadn't been the only thing he'd decided since talking to Chibs.

Swinging his leg over his bike he climbed off and hooked his helmet on the handlebars before taking nervous steps towards the house. When he reached it, he took a deep breath and opened the door, not even thinking about knocking.

Tig was sat on the couch already dressed for the wedding and looking faceable. Kozik clenched his haw at the man looked up at him.

"You calmed the fuck down now?" the sergeant asked in a firm yet calm tone.

Kozik nodded, not moving from the doorway, his hands in his pockets.

"Want to tell me what the fuck that was all about?"

The blond looked at his feet. "I…." he paused to force air into his lungs. "I freaked out."

"No kidding."

"And it made me realize…." he took another couple of breaths before continuing. "This needs to stop."

Tig stared at him, eyes wide and mouth hanging a little open, unsure how to take that.

"I need to get ready. - If you don't mind?…my stuff's…." he nodded towards the bedroom.

Tig shrugged or nodded, he must have done something to grant permission because Kozik was strolling out of the room. The sergeant remained where he was, staring blindly at the TV. He'd just got what he wanted, he'd been thinking they needed to end it, and Kozik had just agreed, had given him an out. So why wasn't he feeling relieved? Why wasn't he happier about it? - Why was he getting up and heading into the bedroom like a storm cloud.

He paused at the threshold. Kozik was sat on the edge of the bed, pulling off his boots, he's already stripped out of his shirt and Tig watched the play of muscles on his arms and shoulders, trying to ignore the hunger the sigh invoked. He hooked his thumbs over his belt and leant his shoulder against the door frame causally. "So that's it?" he tone was cool, almost too cool. Sighing to himself when Kozik stiffened at the sound of his voice. The blond refusing to look at him. "I make a joke, you freak the fuck out and decided we're…..it's over?"

"Basically." Kozik grumbled, getting to his feet and skimming out of his jeans.

"And if I say no?"

Kozik froze with his back to the man. "I transfer."

"You just patched it?"

Kozik shrugged as he before dragging fresh black denim up his thigh. "I know. - But for the good of the club…..it's one or the other."

"What exactly does our lo…..sex life have to do with the club?"

Kozik finished fastening his jean and reached for his black button-down before turning to fact Tig. "Everything had to do with the club."

"Not who I fuck!" Tig replied sharply. Asking himself repeatedly why the hell he was fighting this?" He'd thought the same thing a couple of hours ago. He told himself it was pride, that if anyone was calling it quits on this, whatever, it was him.

Kozik froze and Tig watched his shoulder slump and heard the deep inhale and exhale.

"You're serious about this?" Tig said with a deep frown.

Kozik's head fell forward. "This is….it's too much." he murmured, and Tig wasn't sure he'd actually heart it but if he had, he wasn't sure he wanted to know why.

The room fell eerily silent as neither man moved to speak any further. Kozik finishing buttoning his shirt before lowering himself on the bed to deal with his boot. It seemed to take him forever to get the tied, when they were finally done he stood and reached for his cut. All the while Tig stood at the door flickering between watching him and the carpet. Once Kozik had his cut in place, he turned to look at the older man, his hands in his jean pockets.

"I'll move my stuff back to the club tomorrow, if that's alright."

Tig kept his gaze on the floor. "Sure." he murmured, not really listening.

"I'll pick it up in the morning."

"Wait what?" Tig head shot up to meet Kozik's stair.

"I'll move back to the club until I can find somewhere."

"Oh." Tig shifted, he was not going to voice or even admit that he'd kinda played with the idea of Kozik staying. After all he had a spare room.

As if reading his mind Kozik spoke. "We both know I can't stay here. The club would….they'd see it as….us living together. Can't have that."

Tig stared at him, unsure why he was getting angrily at the club all of a sudden. Why it was fucking him off that the club was dictating his private life?

"We should go." Kozik announced, stepping towards the door and stopping, waiting for Tig to move.

After a moment the sergeant turned and headed away from the bedroom, Kozik following behind him. They left the house, locking up tight and headed for their bikes, neither man saying a single word to each other.

**~TIKOZI~**

They arrived at the reservation together, but after climbing off their bikes and saying hello to their brothers they went their separate ways, the tension obvious between them.

"Hey sweetheart." Gemma smiled wrapping Tig in a warm hug. Pulling back she looked into his face. "You alright?" her gaze flickering over his shoulder to the blond talking with Bobby. "I figured we'd have to drag you two here." she grinned knowingly.

"Yeah, me too." he shrugged, taking his usual stance.

"Tiggy?" she pressed cautiously, her small but firm hand on his shoulder.

"It's nothing Gem."

The first lady of Samcro pulled the sergeant away from the gathering guests. "What happened?"

Tig scuffed his boots at the dirt. "Nothing."

She gave him a disbelieving look and Tig wished she couldn't read him like a book. Taking a deep breath he answered. "He….want to….he called it quits."

Gemma stared at him wide eyes. "What? - Why?"

Tig shrugged. "For the sake of the club apparently." his tone sounded pissed even to his ear.

Gemma rested her hands on her hips and glanced over his shoulder again. "But…why now? It doesn't make sense. He's been like a cat on a tin roof for days."

Tig shook his head. "It's not important. He's right. - It ain't like he's my old lady, it's just stress relief."

Gemma raised a brow at him, unconvinced.

"Look, it's fine. We can't keep doing this now he's patched in, anyway."

"He was patched in before?" Gemma reminded him with a smirk.

Tig shrugged. "That was different."

"Why exactly? Because no he doesn't take you're shit like he used to?"

Tig's head snapped up to glare at the woman. "He never took my shit, that's why I lo….liked about him."

Gemma fought back a grin at Tig's almost slip-up. She knew things were complicated between Tig and Kozik, and even more complicated with the club involved. But she's known Tig for a long time, she's seen him go through women like they were hot dinners, and most of them wound up giving him heartburn. And she's seen what he was like with Kozik. To say it hadn't been weird seeing her friend with another guy would be a lie, especially when she and Tig had almost had something, but she couldn't deny that the pair kinda fit. Always had.

"Listen we've got shit going down, we can't afford to be distracted." Tig added on a sigh.

Gemma looked at him closely and her stomach tightened at the wariness she saw their. She recognized the desire for something more than the club. "Sweetheart. You two have never been a distraction. In fact you tend to work better when your….together." she smirked softly.

Tig scoffed and glanced over his shoulder. "When we're not trying to kill each other you mean."

"Well that's all part of the fun." Gemma laughed, leaning in close. "Besides, I was kinda hoping for a bit of a show."

Tig turned hot excited eyes on her. "Oh really?"

Gemma's laughter increased as she swatted at his arm. "You know me honey, always up for something new."

The conservation was interrupted by the sound of loud voices in the distance and a scuffled. The pair rushed towards the ruckus to find a blonde yelling at Kozik. She was clearly drunk or high, and extremely furious. Tig instantly recognized her from his place a few hours ago.

"Shit." Gemma murmured beside Tig, quickening her pace.

"Your disgusting, I can't believe I let you put your dirty fucking hands on me, or fuck me! God knows what I've caught! You make me sick! Do they know what you do! Do they?! Do they know you're a fucking dirty fag?!" she was looking around the small ground of angry face, each man glaring at her fighting the urge to manhandle her away. "You better watch out, he'll be trying to fuck you soon! Or maybe you want that? Maybe you're all dirty fuck homos!"

She squealed as a set of sharp well-manicured nails bit deep into her arm, dragging her away from the group before they ripped her to pieces. Honey looked up to meet the terrifying furious face of Gemma Teller-Marrow towering over her and she swallowed hard.

"Listen bitch. This is a wedding not some cheap scank bar, so show some fucking respect!" Honey opened her mouth to respond but was silenced as Gemma continued talking. "You not his old lady, you don't get a say in who he fucks, I'm sorry if you're dreams of happy ever after were destroyed but it's time to grow the fuck up. You're a god-damn groupie slut, an easy lay, hoping one of these guys will see back the cheap bottle blonde hair and drug-store make-up enough to shove their dicks up your arse, and you got what you wanted. For a while at least, but it's over now…." Gemma took a step forward and lowered her voice. "And you're pale scrawny backside clearly can't compete with his tight fucking hole." her head jilted slight in Tig's direction. "So I suggest you back the fuck off." Gemma took a moment to calm herself, seeing the hurt in the young croweater's eyes. Taking a breath he met them earnestly. "Listen sweetheart. This is how it works here, a guy can fuck whoever he wants, if you can't handle that, I think you need to quit coming around, find yourself a nice boy and become a soccer mom."

Honey stood shaking, her mouth hanging open, tears pooling in her eyes. She looked over Gemma's shoulder to the guilt ridden face of Kozik and then to the furious one of Tig before taking a trembling breath, turning on her heels and rushing away.

There was a tense silence for a moment before Gemma turned round and fixed the blond biker with a stare that had him squirming. She took a few steps towards him, her voice low. "I had better not just humiliated that girl for nothing." He swallowed at the knowing gleam in her eyes. He's gaze shooting to Tig's a few feet away, and his stomach rolled. Straightening her back Gemma patted him on the shoulder and walked away, sending Tig an encouraging smile as she went.

The other members followed after her, leaving Tig and Kozik alone for a few minutes, not speaking, just watching each other. Finally Tig turned and lead the way toward the seats.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I was a bit harsh on poor Honey. I mean who wouldn't be pissed if they walked in on the guy they'd been sleeping with rutting with some other guy. (Okay, in this case, Us. – We so wouldn't have cared. Hell, we'd probably have grabbed the popcorn and settled in for the show. Rofl.) But Honey isn't a Tikozi girl. Anyway, we know what Gemma's like when she pissed and Honey didn't exactly choice the best time to publically humiliate Kozik, of course Gem was going to rip her a new one. Plus I like the idea that Gem is a Tikozi girl *giggle*
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and for the wonderful feedback. Please keep it coming, it keeps me on my toes.


	7. Chapter 7

Tig sat though the service fighting his guilt while he saw happy for Opie he could help thinking the man would have been happier if he'd still had his first wife. Lyla was a nice girl and she was clearly besotted with the man, but something in Opie's eyes, something in the way he stood and hesitated during his vows told Tip, Opie didn't actually share her feelings like he should.

Tig swallowed hard at the pain in his chest. He didn't think he'd ever forgive himself for what he'd done to Opie and his kids, and he didn't deserve to either. A small usually silent part of his mind remark that his crime was the reason he wasn't get a change to be happy, but he quickly dowsed the thought. It wasn't like that. Fighting hard not to look over his shoulder to the man a seat behind him, he shifted in his seat as the desire to do so grew. - While he wouldn't look he couldn't block out the man's voice as he let out a cheer as Opie and Lyla were pronounced husband and wife. He rubbed at his jaw as everyone rose to applauded.

Everyone made the way to the reception area that was also being held at the reservation. Tig dropped down at a table with a beer, Chibs and Juice sat on either side of him. They held a light conversation but soon Tig's attention was pulled away from his brothers to his lover - or ex lover as the case was now.

Kozik was across the large expanse of table and chairs, talking to a few girls, refusing point blank to look Tig's way. The sergeant tightened his jaw and dropped his gaze to the beer cradled in his hand. Chibs and Juice were still talking over him, oblivious to the internal battle raging inside him. - At least that was what he thought and hoped.

"You know, the whole fun of a wedding is getting to fuck the bridesmaids." Chibs laughed.

Juice looked at his friend with disgust. "I wouldn't let Jax or Opie hear you say that." he gaze slipping over to where said bridesmaid stood. Lyla had asked Tara and Opie's daughter to be her bridesmaids.

Chibs groaned. "Aye, that's why this wedding sucks. You think Lyla would at least have asked one of her porn star buddies to be a bridesmaid." Chibs grumbled like the world was against him.

"There's a whole group of porn stars over there." Juice laughed nodding to the women gathered around Kozik and Bobby Elvis.

"Not the same Boy-o. Traditions a tradition." he laughed.

"Well why don't you say that to Jax and Tara, you never know, they might accommodate." Juice sniggered.

"I'll tell Jackie you said that Boy-o. - Hey Jackie!"

Juice paled, looking from his best friend to his vice-president, his heart leaping into his throat at the man turned. He breathed a sigh of relief when Chibs just lifted a bottle in salute, before turning back to him with a wicked grin.

"You alright Boy-o, you look a little green." Chibs laughed.

"Fucker." Juice snapped, flipping him off.

The pair fell silent, Juice's gaze falling on the man sat between them. It was so out of character for Tig not you make some disturbing comment, Juice glanced across the table to his friend who looked just as concerned and confused at him. Chibs shrugged at him before rolling his eyes when Tig's head drifted up and they followed the sergeant's gaze.

"Hey Juicy-boy, grab me a fresh beer and a scotch."

Juice stared at his friend who gave him a get-the-fuck-out-of-here-so-we-can-talk look. He got to his feet as if nothing was happening. "What did your last slave die of?" he asked with a moan.

Chibs thought for a moment before smirking at the young man. "If memory serves a bottle up the arse." he laughed waving his empty beer bottle at Juice. "Just punishment for not getting me a damn drink."

Juice rolled his eyes, laughing as he headed off to the bar, leaving Chibs to yet another awkward unwelcome conversation.

Chibs sat silently watching his brother out of the corner of his eye. He knew what was going on, or at least he knew that something had happened between Tig and Kozik, he wasn't up on all the detail and he most definitely didn't know what had happened since Kozik had left the club after their talk. But judging by the twitch in Tig's jaw and the way he kept shooting a mix of daggers and longing looks across the reception he figures things hadn't sorted themselves out.

He wondered how he'd found himself being Dr fucking Phil to these too. It wasn't what he'd expected when he'd joined the Sons. And while he had no problem giving Jackie or Juicy advise on their love lives, it was completely different with Tig. After what the fucking hell did he know about gay relationships? Sure he's experimented, prison was a boring place, but that was sex. Sex wasn't a relationship and it didn't lead to complications, well unless you caught something or knocked someone up, which really wasn't an option when it came to man-love. So how was he meant to have a fucking heart to heart with Tig about Kozik? Especially when he knew that the sergeant saw his 'relationship' with Kozik in practically the same light as he saw Chibs saw prison sex.

The long uncomfortable silence dragged out for way too long, Chibs glanced around suddenly wishing he hadn't sent Juice away. He sort the boy out and found him sanding talking to Kozik and Bobby, no sign of a drink in his hands. He turned back around in his seat, he'd have to go get it himself, which meant leaving Tig. - Which was honestly fine with him.

"You two are a right pair, brother." Chibs said lightly.

Tig looked up at him with a frowned. "Huh?"

"All this mooning over you're beers. You like a fucking pair of birds." he laughed, hoping to break the tension.

Tig's eyes shot over the reception to Kozik, who was laughing at something some porn slut was saying. "He don't look like he's _mooning_."

Chibs looked too and huffed. "Yeah, well you should have seen him a couple of hours ago at the club, looking like he'd just ran over a pup….." he trailed off, knowing that mentioning dead dogs would only cause more trouble. "…panda."

Tig rose a brow at his friend, a slight smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth. "So you saw him earlier?" he asked casually.

Chibs shrugged and nodded. "Aye."

"Did he….did you talk?" Something in Tig's stomach was clenching tight. Sure when Kozik had left he'd been a little weird, but coming home and calling a halt to proceedings seemed like way too quick a decision.

Chibs shrugged again. "He need to get stuff off his chest." Chibs murmured casually, reaching out to grab a beer from a passing redhead, giving her a wink and a slap on the arse as she laughed a complaint and walked back to the bar.

"So what exactly did you tell him?" Tig asked, his back getting straight and his teeth grinding painfully against each other.

Chibs looked at his friend, hearing the shift in his tone. He dropped the lightness he'd been using. "I just told him he needed to sort things out."

"And put the club first?"

Chibs stared. "Aye." he watched Tig's face slowly turn red.

"And who the fuck gave you permission to interfere?" Tig snapped angrily.

Chibs leant forward dangerously. "He did, when he decided to talk to me about you fucking up….again."

"What happens between me and Kozy has fuck all to do with you!" Tig's voice was rising in volume as he got angrier, he could feel eyes turning to look at him but ignored them. "Or the fucking club. - I'm free to fuck whoever the fucking hell I want!"

Chibs abandoned his beer. "Not when it starts screwing with club business." he snapped back, keeping his voice low.

"And how exactly is me and Koz doing that?" he fumed.

Chibs lowered his voice further, leaning in closer to the man. "When you make him so fucking miserable that he thinks about leaving."

Tig's eyes turned steel hard as they meet the Scotsman's. "Just keep you're fucking Scottish nose out of my relationship." he growled dangerously.

Chibs didn't blink at what was said. "Like you know what a fucking relationship is." he smirked, getting up from his seat. He walking away only to stop and storm back to the table, leaning over into Tig's face. "I don't give a fuck you're screwing Tig, I just don't want any trouble. But the way you are, they way to think about your 'relationship' that's trouble." his voice was low so no one but Tig could hear him. "I told him you're never gonna change, that you'll keep fucking around, because you're just too fucked up to actually be normal for once in your god-damn life." With that Chibs turned around and headed for the bar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't help putting a Chibs/Juice moment in. I love them. They're my second fave pairing and maybe someday I'll get around to writing a story for them. Once I've finished with my boys of course. Anyway hope you enjoyed the chapter.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and for the wonderful feedback. Please keep it coming, it keeps me on my toes.


	8. Chapter 8

Kozik let his gaze drift across the tables, a false smile fixed on his face. Tig was sat having what looked like a heated discussion with Chibs. Kozik's gut clenched tight as he hoped he wasn't the subject. A hope that was crushed when Tig's angry voice carried over the chatter and music.

"What happens between me and Kozy has fuck all to do with you!"

Kozik felt his face heat and pale at the same instant. He dropped his gaze to stare at his boots, knowing people were watching him. He hadn't felt so embarrassed and ashamed in years; he looked up at the sound of hushed whispers to see Chibs marching away from the table. As the Scotsman passed him, Kozik set an apologetic look his way and the man gave a sharp nod in response.

Kozik turned his attention back to the man now sat alone at the table looking like he wanted to shoot someone, probably Kozik himself. He found it a little hard to believe that Tig was in such a state, that he'd made such a public display. Ever since they'd started, whatever it was, Tig had made it clear that it wasn't for public acknowledgement. An open secret that was never spoken about. To hear Tig announce in no uncertain terms that there _was_ something between them was….overwhelming, and the blond couldn't fight the warmth it sent through him. But it was a little hard to believe that Tig had meant his outburst to sound as it did. He knew deep down that the sergeant's problem was that he was some how regretting the end of their affair, but was rather pissed at not being the one to end it. Tig always had to call the shots, he was a control freak. It had been that way since day one.

Kozik stood with his arm around a blond as she whispered in his ear, trying to push Tig and his outburst from his mind. He was even considering slipping away with her, but part of him was fully aware of Tig across the area, even though he wasn't watching him. When his phone vibrated in his pocket, he didn't think twice about answering. It wasn't a call but a message. His heart skipped at the name flashing on the display, and his gaze snapped towards the table. Tig was already walking away toward the trees that lay a few feet away. Looking back down at his phone he hit the button and read the message.

**Inbox: Tig**

**We need to talk. Now.**

Kozik shook his head, swallowing back his pounding heart at the man's audacity. He knew what was on the other end of that path, he knew what Tig would do and say if he followed. Snapping his phone closed he told himself he wasn't going to go.

**~TIKOZI~**

He caught sight of Tig a few feet away, the soft glow of a cigarette in the tree line. What the hell was he doing? He knew how this was going to end and every part of him said he needed to stop, now. He couldn't keep doing this, couldn't keep pretending but as much as he knew this, he couldn't help but go back time after time. It wasn't healthy, he knew that too, but what was in his life? He was an addict after all, but the drugs had only ever beer a substitute for his true addiction. - Alex Trager.

Tig was in his system again, coursing though his veins, pulling him back, taunting him, seducing him and like most addicts he found it almost impossible to resist. As Kozik got closer Tig moved deeper into the woods and the blond follow the smell of smoke and the soft red glow. Tig was leaning casually against a tree, when he caught up, the man's gaze fixed to the earth.

"What do you want?" Kozik demanded, keeping a grip on his control.

Tig took a final draw on his cigarette before crushing it beneath his boot angrily. "Whatever Chibs said, ignore it, he doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about."

Kozik stared at the older man for a long moment, a little confused until he realised what this was about. "Chibs didn't say anything that wasn't true."

Tig looked up at him with hard blue eyes. "The club doesn't get a say in…. _this_."

"No. - But I do."

Tig groaned and turned his body towards the man. Kozik wasn't thinking when he took a step back, Tig glared at his reaction, his jaw twitching.

"So that's it?"

Kozik sent him a small nod.

"At least tell me why?" Tig asked, hating the desperation in his voice.

"I've already told you, it's best for the club."

"Bullshit. This isn't about the club, I don't believe for a second you're throwing away what we've got because of them."

"What we have?" Kozik scoffed. "Oh you mean that year of secretly fucking in backrooms because you didn't want your best friend to know you actually liked taking it up the arse? You mean eight years of blame and hatred for something that was out of my control? Of avoiding me at every opportunity? Of three weeks of bitching and sending me accusatory looks and pissing on my hand of friendship? - Or maybe you mean the four hours of fighting and fucking before you got sent down? - Oh and lets not forget the eighteen months of letters and quick phone calls to get in the mood to go and fuck some nameless bastard. - Though apparently you remembered their names." Kozik's tone was cold and unfeeling, even as his heart pounded painfully in his chest.

Tig dragged his hand through his hair. "Jesus, I was joking, for fuck sake."

Kozik shrugged. "It doesn;t matter." he sighed.

Tig glared at him, angry at having there past thrown back in his face, but he asked for it. "You're acting like some fucking jealous old lady!" Tig snapped.

Kozik straightened. If he wanted out he was going to have to get Tig to let him go, and the only way that would even happen was if the sergeant was the one to run. Taking a breath Kozik put his head on the chopping block. "Yeah, well maybe I fucking feel like one!"

There was a strained silence as Tig stared at the blond. "What?"

Kozik released the breath he'd been holding, his heart racing but his back was painfully straight and he wasn't going to show Tig a single ounce of weakness, because if he did, the man would eat him alive. "You heard me."

Tig turned his back on his lover, his head spinning.

"You want to know why I'm calling quits, that's it. It's not because of Chibs or the club. I don't give two shits what the club says, and neither do you. If we did this wouldn't have happened in the first place. - It's over because I can't take it anymore alright. I'm getting in to deep, I've been too deep for a long time, and I can't take it, so I'm dragging myself out before it's too late. This afternoon just proved how trapped I was." Kozik shook his head. "Freaking out like I did, can't happen, so I'm out. We go back to being what we're meant to be, brothers, maybe friends - And if you can't deal with it, I'll go back to Tacoma, or somewhere else." Kozik finally fell silent and watched Tig. When the man didn't speak or move, the blond turned and headed back to the party.

**~TIKOZI~**

It was almost twenty minutes before Tig rejoined the party. Kozik was sat at a table with two croweaters, laughing and flirting outrageously, trying to be normal again, but he still noticed the sergeant's reappearance, as much as he tried not to. He felt his stomach clenched tight as the man walked passed his table, heading straight for the bar. While he knew that telling the man the truth about why he wanted out was a sure-fire way of making sure Tig let him go, he couldn't help but wish he hadn't done it. Now there was no going back. - Not that he wanted to. - But if he did change his mind, there was no way Tig would want back in, not with the possibility of it being serious.

Kozik clenched his jaw and turned back to the women to continue their conversation. He'd already came to the conclusion that he was going home with someone tonight, though sadly not the someone he'd planned to this morning, when he'd stood outside Stockton prison feeling excited and lustful. He couldn't quite believe that had only been that morning, it seemed like a lifetime ago. He jumped when a bottle was slammed down in front of him, looking up he stared at Tig but the man looked away without acknowledging him, to pay all his attention to the brunette, a flirtatious smile on his lips. Kozik felt a spark of jealous as Tig took a seat and began to flirt with the woman, leaning into her, grinning when she pressed her curves against him. But two could play at that game, and he turned to the blond beside him.

The next few hours passed with causal conversation, flirting and friendly banter. It was easy to figure out that Tig had decided that ending things was for the best, and while it hurt like hell, Kozik was grateful. Now they could get on with their lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry, not the end, just a bump in the road. You know Tig never gives up this easy. lol
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and for the wonderful feedback. Please keep it coming, it keeps me on my toes.


	9. Chapter 9

The men strolled out from the tree line as if nothing had happened, has if they hadn't just killed three Russians. But they'd deserved it so none of them were feeling bad. - Not that they ever did.

Clay stopped, staring at the party with a fond smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. He glanced over at his sergeant at arms and the man beside him. "Kozik, I want you to go with Happy and Miles. Hap's said we can store the guns at his gran's place until we're ready."

Tig frowned despite himself. "You want me to go?" he heard himself ask and wished he hadn't when Clay stared at him.

"No. I need you here."

Tig and Kozik both nodded as Clay moved to head back to the party. He got a few feet before pausing again, as if something had just occurred to him. He looked back, fixing Kozik with a look neither of the men could read. "You head out in a few hours. Happy'll pick you up at…." he paused looking between them. "…Tig's place." then he walked away before Kozik could correct him over his new living arrangements.

The sergeant at arms looked over at the slightly younger man who didn't look happy.

"I'll text Hap' let him know to meet me at the club." Kozik murmured not looking at his ex-lover.

"Don't bother. You can stay at mine. I've got the spare room." Tig said matter-of-factly.

Kozik stiffened. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"I thought you wanted us to act like nothing had happened. Well, I'm doing that. You're not the first brother to crash at my place while he looks for a place and your stuffs there already. - It's only until you can find somewhere else."

Kozik looked at the man with uncertainly. It wasn't that he didn't trust Tig; it was just that….he didn't trust Tig.

"I really don't think it's a…."

"Let's get a drink." Tig cut in, walking away, ignoring the men completely.

Kozik rolled his eyes slowly, following behind the sergeant, telling himself. It was one night, he'd crash there tonight and when he gets back from Oakland, he'll move back to the club house.

**~TIKOZI~**

It was two thirty when the guys stumbled into the house. They weren't drunk, not really, but they'd drunk enough to relax them and make the tension a distance memory. Kozik dropped down on the couch warily, his head falling back against the cushions, while Tig headed for the kitchen. The blond heard the familiar sound of the fridge door opening and bottles clinking. He cracked an eye to see Tig holding out a bottle to him before he dropped down next to him. Kozik took the offered beer and sat drinking it in a comfortable silence. He was so at ease he almost stopped thinking. The bottle pressed to his lips, his head back and his eyes closed, he was at peace, more than he'd been in months, years even. He knew what gave him that peace and he wasn't sure what he was meant to do without it.

Over the course of the evening it seemed to be the only thing on his mind, he'd heard the members talking about the possible hell that was coming there way, killing the Russians and taking their guns was going to bring a fire storm and Kozik wondered if now was the time to cut the ties to his anchor.

He hadn't been one for second guessing himself but maybe he'd made a mistake? Maybe he'd allowed a moments weakness to destroy something he needed? He knew he was back peddling, that he regretting giving up, but wasn't that what addicts did? They question whether giving up was really necessary. They tell themselves they could stop at any time so what did it matter if they kept going for a little longer. His therapist had told him he had to stay away from the drugs, that being around them would threaten a relapse. Kozik knew she would have said the same about Tig. She would have told him that it was dangerous returning to Charming.

He felt the couch shift beside him and he peered up as Tig got to his feet.

"I'm crashing." Tig murmured, heading towards the bedrooms.

Kozik watched him go and sighed warily. Happy was going to be there in a few hours, he should probably get some sleep too, get the alcohol out of his system. The last thing they needed was to get pulled over on their way to Oakland. With a groan he got to his feet, stretching out his back before following after Tig.

The spare room was across the hall from Tig's, both doors hanging open. The blond glanced into his room. The bed unmade, the room filled with boxes. It was only one night he told himself again. He just needed a mattress to sleep on. His head turned to glance into Tig's room. The man stood with his back to him, stripping out of his cut and shirt. Kozik watched the muscles on the man's back move beneath his flesh. Unlike Jax and Opie and a few others, Tig didn't have the patch tattoo'd there, it was just an expense healed bullet wounds and knife attacks, lightly tanned.

As Kozik continued to watch the sergeant at arms, Tig dropped his jean's revealing his bare arse. The blonds lips twitched at the realization that he'd gone commando once again, meaning he'd expected to get lucky after, if not at, the party. Kozik felt his chest tighten as he wondered who exactly Tig had expected to be fucking tonight.

"Are you going to bed or you gonna stand there staring at my arse all night?"

Kozik jumped at the sudden sound of Tig's voice. "Oh, um…." the blonds eyes widened as his ex-lover turned to face him, his hands on his hips as if he was still fully clothed, his dick slowly getting hard.

"For fuck sake, Koz, stop being a stubborn bastard. We both know you don't want to be in that room, so just get the fuck in here." Tig snapped with frustration.

The blond swallowed hard, torn between his desire and need and what he knew he should do. Ending things with Tig had been the right decision for everyone, but his doubts had started almost the moment he'd done it, and had haunted him all night. But he knew if he took Tig up on his offer now, he would regret it come morning, and they'd be back where they started.

And despite knowing this, Kozik took that step, stripping himself of his cut and shirt as he crossed the threshold to the room. Later he would blame the drink, even though he knew that he wasn't that far gone, but now, all he cared about was the fix.

**~TIKOZI~**

Tig grinned triumphantly as Kozik marched towards him. He'd known the man wouldn't be able to stay away, so he'd played along with the idiot's little game, all the while knowing they'd end up here.

His hand shot out, grabbing the waistband of Kozik's jeans and yanked him up against him, his hand clenching the man's short blond hair to pull him into a hard unforgiving kiss.

The route to the bed was a tangle of hands, clothing and tongue's. Kozik fell back onto the mattress with a huff, Tig not waiting a moment before crawling over him. The frame complained under their weight, but neither cared. Tig drew back to drag off the blonds boots and jeans, tossing them aside without a thought of where they would land. When they did, there was a muffed bang.

Tig hovered over his lover once again, grinding himself down hard, making the man moan loudly. Tig grinned wickedly as he dropped his mouth to Kozik's, biting hard on his lower lip before sucking it into his mouth, and slipping his tongue between the man's teeth. The kiss was hot, passionate and rough, leaving no corner over looked.

After a few minutes, Kozik pulled back breathlessly. "Fuck." he panted, staring up at Tig, his gaze harsh, filled with lust and self-loathing. "Fuck me." he demanded.

Tig grinned. "That was my plan."

Kozik met the man's gaze firmly. "I mean it Tig. Really fuck me. Remind me it's just sex. It's all it's ever been."

The sergeant paused for a moment, just looking at the man beneath him, unsure how he felt. Finally he gave a sharp nod and shifted to reach for the night stand. Kozik's hand snapped up, stopping him. The look in the blonds' eyes told him everything he needed to know and his stared into the man's pale blue eyes. Torn between his desire to give Kozik what he wanted, and his desire to actually live with himself. He decided self preservation came first and he shook off the man's hand, continuing his hunt for the lube and condoms. His heart jumping as Kozik swore at him and fell back against the bed.

Despite choosing the righteous path, Tig wasn't gentle or caring as he prepared the blond. Each movement was rouge and harsh, unforgiving in ever instant, causing the man to groan and hiss. Kozik's head snapped back as Tig rammed himself inside, a deep half pained, half relieved cry being ripped from the blonds' throat. Tig kept his promise, it was just sex, sex in its most brutal and primal sense. Hard, hot and manic. Neither man looking at each other.

Kozik's eyes closed tight. It was just what he wanted. It was what was going to make the next day, week, month bearable. Because all this was was lust, desire and plan emotionless sex. Just as it had started out being for both of them. Before feeling seeped him and softened his core.

Tig slammed into him hard, sending sparks rocketing through his body, bright white lights dancing behind his eyes and the world seem to scream around him. His eyes shot open in surprise and instantly connected with Tig's and something happened. Tig's frantic pounding pace stopped….just for an instant. When it started again it was different. What had been hard and primal became….something else entirely. The older man shifted his weight, causing the blonds legs to slip from his strong tanned shoulders to curl around the sergeant's waist. Tig's body shifted further till he was hovering over his blond lover. The pace settled into a calm and steady rhythm they had never really shared before. The room growing quiet as the loud grunting and groans and cries morphed into more gentle moans and pants. Even the bed stopped protesting their actions.

With the new steady pace, Tig began kissing the man beneath him once more, their mouths matching the rhythm of their bodies. Tig's hand slid between them, helping bring Kozik to his climax, and following swiftly behind the blond, groaning a noise that may have been his name before collapsing on top of the man, breathless and satisfied.

Rolling away a few minutes later, Tig stared up at the ceiling, bemused and amazed. "Fuck." he murmured, still breathless. "Shit! What the fuck was that?"

Kozik didn't answer the question. He turned to look at the man he'd tried to keep his distance from. Tig ran his hand over his face as he tired to recapture his breath and Kozik watched him closely. He seemed more relaxed than usual, flushed and at ease. The blonds' stomach tightened and he refused to allow himself to think about what that meant. He sighed and pushed himself up, wincing when his body protested. It hadn't been subjected to any excitement in over a year, and was out of practice. He moved to the edge of the bed and just sat there in silence.

Tig glanced out from under his hand. "Where the fuck are you going?"

Kozik didn't look at him. "To….the other room."

The sergeant removed his hand and pushed himself up on his elbows to glare at the other man's back. "Don't be a fucking idiot."

Kozik's head snapped around to glare right back at Tig. "This is all your fucking fault." he yelled angrily. "Why couldn't you just let me alone? Why did you have to….?" he growled and got to his feet, grabbing his jeans and stepping into them, while complaining under his breath.

Tig lifted a brow. "What? I didn't do anything fucker!" he yelled back.

"You…..didn't you? You taunted and lured me back into your fucking bed and now look what's fucking happened."

Tig stared at the man furiously. Unsure what the hell was actually going on? "We had sex." he stated, not so calmly.

"That wasn't sex and you fucking know it….or at least you would if you weren't a completely fucking emotional cripple! It started out as sex and then you went and fucking changed the rules. I told you I couldn't do _this_! That I was getting in too deep and you didn't listen." Kozik snapped, angry at himself as much as Tig, angry at being an addict. "Now look at me, I'm acting like a fucking chick because you just couldn't go and find some other fucking moron to fuck!"

Tig narrowed his gaze. "I thought you didn't want me fucking other guys?"

"Don't. Don't try and turn this into a joke. This is completely screwed up. I should never have come back to Charming. I should have left when you told me too. - I should never have gotten involved with you again. I knew this would happen again. _I knew it_."

Tig shifted to the edge of the bed. "Jesus, calm the fuck down, man. Shit." he ran a hand through his hair, before searching out the man's gaze. "Look I get it okay. I get what this is. I acknowledge things are different." Tig gave a wary sigh, never breaking the eye contact he'd established.

Kozik stared at him in amazement, unsure if Tig really did understand what the fuck was going on. But one look at the man and he knew he did, because he saw pure terror in his blue eyes. A look he was sure was mirrored in his own.

The pair were silent as the ramifications of what had changed settled between them.

"Can we just…" Tig sighed again, shaking his head, He shifting back on the bed. "You've got to ride out in a couple of hours, let's just deal with all this old lady shit when you get back."

Kozik couldn't believe what he'd just heard, he watched in amazement and confusion as Tig moved onto the other side of the bed, turning his back to him. Kozik stripped out of his jean without even realizing it, then climbed in next to Tig. They lay back to back, silent as sleep dragged them under, neither sure where this was going to take them.


	10. Chapter 10

Tig's arm shot out with a groan to grab at the mobile as it buzz against the wooden nightstand, his head was still humming. He lifted the piece of plastic to his ear without opening his eyes. "What!" he snapped groggily. He groaned at the sound of Happy's voice. The sound of a hand connecting with flesh filled the room, swiftly followed by the cry of pain. He smirked as Kozik leapt off the bed.

"What the fuck!" the blond yelled.

"He'll be out in five." Tig grumbled down the line before hanging up and tossing the phone on the nightstand. "The guys are waiting." he informed the blond with his eyes still closed.

"And you couldn't just nudge me awake?" Kozik complained, searching for his clothes. "I've got to ride man."

Tig cracked open an eye to see the bright red hand mark on the other man's butt-cheek. He didn't stop the smirk. "Oh, you've had worse." he chuckled.

Kozik flipped him off while shrugging into his cut.

Strapping his knife to his belt, Kozik grabbed the keys to his bike and his mobile, which had two missed calls and turned back to look at the naked man on the bed. He paused for a moment, taking in the man's mass of unruly hair, and the smirk still pulling at his lips. He had the desire to kiss him goodbye, but knew that would be awkward and would no doubt pissed Tig off, and he really didn't want an argument before riding out, instead he kicked the side of the bed and grumbled a "See ya later." before strolling out of the door.

Tig lay listening to the heavy fall of Kozik's boots. "Hey moron!" he called after the man.

"Yeah!"

"Ride safe, okay."

Kozik's head popped back around the door frame with an arrogant smug grin. "Will do babe." he winked.

"Blow me." Tig replied, showing the blond the finger.

"Would love to sweetheart, but I don't think Haps' would be willing to wait. - Even if it is only two and a half minutes."

Tig glared at the man, yanking his pillow out from behind his head and flinging it at the door. "Fucker!"

"Love ya too Tinkerbelle." Kozik laughed as he marched away, the sound following him all the way to the door.

"Maybe if you knew how to do it properly it would last longer!"

Tik lay in bed with his eyes fixed to the ceiling, listening as the front door opened and closed, then for the sound of an engine starting. He tried to ignore the lead weight in his chest as the sound vanished into the distance. Taking a deep breath Tig turned over and buried his face into the abandoned pillow, closing his eyes he drifted back to sleep, the smell of his lover in his nose.

**~TIKOZI~**

Tig woke alone a couple of hours later when his alarm went off. Groaning he ran a hand through his hair as he rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling, fully aware that the house had that empty feeling again, just like it had eight years ago when he'd lost Missy and then Kozik. - Not that Koz was living with him; he just stayed over some nights. Sighing warily he rolled out of bed and strolled into the bathroom. He turned on the hot water and stepped under the stream, savouring the feel of having a shower without the fear of getting jumped. He let the water run down his face as his hand slipped down to deal with his morning hard-on. He hadn't expected to have to do this for himself again once he was free.

He still couldn't believe Clay had sent Kozik on this run, couldn't he have sent Chibs and Juice? It wasn't like they'd complain. Juice didn't have an old lady to catch up with. - Not that koz was his old lady. Even if he was acting like one. - And if it was really that important for whatever reason that Kozik go, then couldn't he have sent him too.

Tig pushed the thoughts aside to concentrate on what he was doing. He couldn't stop the image of a pair of blue eyes and a head of blond spiked hair appearing in his mind. Despite what Kozik thought, he hadn't been that much of a slut inside. He'd fucked a couple of guys, sure, fourteen months was a long time, but he hadn't allowed any one to fuck him. - Though he'd never been up for that, before or after Kozik. But the few guys he had been with inside hadn't been anything more than a frustrated five minutes. Most of the time he was reduced to his own hand.

He reached his climax finally and wasted away the evidence before finishing his shower and getting ready to head to the club. As he dressed he thought about Clay and how his best friend had been with him of late. There was something different between them and he wasn't sure what it was. It had started inside; Clay had found his sudden disinterest in fucking his way through the block first amusing and then annoying. It didn't make much sense to him if he was honest. It wasn't like Clay was on his bunk-buddy list. But over the last few months, the closer they got to getting released the weirder he'd been acting around him.

Tig strapped on his knife and headed for his bike, wondering if it had anything to do with him and Kozik.

**~TIKOZI~**

Tig spent the next few days feeling strangely like hell. Clay was continuing to act distant towards him; though he had to admit he was distant with everyone. - Well, except Jax, and Tig had to agree with Bobby that that was strange and in a way rather unsettling. But life at the club wasn't what was really making him uneasy, it was the apartment. It kinda freaked him out that the blond had gotten under his skin so completely after only a day. - Only it hadn't been a day. Kozik had been under his skin since the moment the moron had knocked him on his arse. Most of the time it was out of irritation, the rest was lust. He didn't know which had pulled him in the first time, or the last. All he knew was that he couldn't help but want more. It had been the promise of more that had made prison bearable. Though he'd never admit that to anyone, it barely felt comfortable admitting it to himself.

Tig groaned to himself and lifted the bottle of beer to his lips, taking a deep gulp. It was his fifth since getting home an hour ago, the empties scattering the table. He glanced at the clock. 3AM. He knew he should go to bed, he had to get up in the morning to work on the crates with the others, but the idea of going to bed alone was unappealing. He'd been furious when what had started out as an excellent home coming had turned into a disaster. And he'd hated the fear that had gone through him when he'd thought that everything he'd been holding onto, everything that had gotten him home could be lost. He'd been so relived when Kozik had changed his mind. - And then it had gotten complicated and fucked up. He'd meant what he said to the younger man, he did know that something had changed between them. He'd known it before he'd even returned to Charming. Hell, he'd know before he'd gone. From the moment Kozik had stepped foot back in Charming, wanting his patch back.

He knew, and he suspected Kozik did too, that he'd only been angry at him, bitching at him every five seconds because he hadn't wanted to acknowledge how much he'd missed him. He could brush it off when Kozik was simply passing through, he could ignore him, but having him around all the time, he just wasn't ready for that, or what it meant. Things had been progressing that way before Missy, he knew it, the club knew it. But then he hadn't cared. It was strange what eight years could do. Now, after losing Missy and everything he'd done since, the idea had freaked him out. Because the last thing he could afford to lose was his club. His eyes were drifting closed as his head fell back against the cushions, when his phone buzzed on the table. Groaning again he reached for it.

**MGS: Kozik.**

**Are you still awake?**

Tig smiled to himself, not bothering to text back; instead he scrolled down his contacts and hit call. It rang twice before the familiar warm sound of Kozik filled his ears. "What the hell do you want?" Tig said, fighting a grin.

" _Thought we could talk. "_

"Talk?" Tig frowned.

" _Yeah."_

"Where are the others?"

" _Sleeping."_

Tig's lip curled into a mischievous smirk and he shifted on the couch, his beer forgotten as he tugged at his zipper. "Oh, in that case, I think I could spare the time to talk." he laughed and knew Kozik understood him when he sighed.

Tig’s arm shot out with a groan to grab at the mobile as it buzz against the wooden nightstand. His head was still humming. He lifted the piece of plastic to his ear without opening his eyes. “What!” he snapped groggily. He groaned at the sound of Happy’s voice.

The sound of a hand connecting with flesh filled the room, swiftly followed by the cry of pain. He smirked as Kozik leapt off the bed.

“What the fuck!” the blond yelled.

“He’ll be out in five.” Tig grumbled down the line before hanging up and tossing the phone on the nightstand. “The guys are outside.” he informed the blond with his eyes still closed.

“And you couldn’t just nudge me awake?” Kozik complained, searching for his clothes. “I’ve got to ride man.”

Tig cracked open an eye to see the bright red hand mark on the other man’s butt-cheek. He didn’t stop the smirk. “Oh, you’ve had worse.” he chuckled.

Kozik flipped the guy off while shrugging into his cut.

Strapping his knife to his belt, Kozik grabbed the keys to his bike and his mobile, which had two missed calls and turned back to look at the naked man on the bed. He paused for a moment, taking in the man’s mass of unruly hair, and the smirk still pulling at his lips. He had the desire to kiss him goodbye, but knew that would pissed the man off, and he really didn’t want an argument before riding out, instead he kicked the side of the bed and grumbled a “See ya later.” before strolling out of the door.

Tig sat listening to the heavy fall of Kozik’s boots. “Hey moron!” he called after the man.

“Yeah!”

“Ride safe, okay.”

Kozik’s head popped back around the door frame with an arrogant smug grin. “Will do babe.” he winked.

“Blow me.” Tig replied, showing the blond the finger.

“Would love to sweetheart, but I don’t think Haps’ would be willing to wait. - Even if it is only two and a half minutes.”

Tig glared at the man, yanking his pillow out from behind his head and flinging it at the door. “Fucker!”

“Love ya too Tinkerbelle.” Kozik laughed as he marched away, the sound following him all the way to the door.

Tik remained in bed with his eyes fixed to the ceiling, listening as the front door opened and closed, then for the sound of an engine starting. He tried to ignore the lead weight in his chest as the sound vanished into the distance. Taking a deep breath Tig turned over and buried his face into the abandoned pillow, closing his eyes he drifted back to sleep, the smell of his lover in his nose.

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

Tig woke alone a couple of hours later when his alarm went off. Groaning he ran a hand through his hair as he rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling, fully aware that the house had that empty feeling again, just like it had eight years ago when he’d lost Missy and then Kozik. - Not that Koz was living with him; he just stayed over some nights.

Sighing warily he rolled out of bed and strolled into the bathroom. He turned on the hot water and stepped under the stream, savouring the feel of having a shower without the fear of getting jumped. He let the water run down his face as his hand slipped down to deal with his morning hard-on. He hadn’t expected to have to do this for himself again once he was free.

He still couldn’t believe Clay had sent Kozik on this run, couldn’t he have sent Chibs and Juice? It wasn’t like they’d complain. Juice didn’t have an old lady to catch up with. - Or if it was really that important for whatever reason that Kozik go, then couldn’t he have sent him too.

Tig pushed the thoughts aside to concentrate on what he was doing. He couldn’t stop the image of a pair of blue eyes and a head of blond spiked hair appearing behind his lids. Despite what Kozik thought, he hadn’t been that much of a slut inside. He’d fucked a couple of guys, sure, fourteen months was a long time, but he hadn’t allowed any one to fuck him. - Though he’d never been up for that, before or after Kozik. But the few guys he had been with inside hadn’t been anything more than a frustrated ten minutes. Most of the time he was reduced to his own hand.

He reached his climax finally and washed away the evidence before finishing his shower and getting ready to head to the club. As he dressed he thought about Clay and how his best friend had been with him of late. There was something different between them and he wasn’t sure what it was. It had started inside; Clay had found his sudden disinterest in fucking his way through the block amusing but then annoying. It didn’t make much sense to him if he was honest. It wasn’t like Clay was on his bunk-buddy list. But over the last few months, the closer they got to getting released, the weirder he’d been acting around him. - Tig strapped on his knife and headed for his bike, wondering if it had anything to do with him and Kozik.

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

Tig spent the next few days feeling strangely like hell. Clay was continuing to act distant towards him; though he had to admit he was distant with everyone. - Well, except Jax, and Tig had to agree with Bobby that that was strange and in a way rather unsettling.

But life at the club wasn’t what was really making him uneasy, it was the apartment. It kinda freaked him out that the blond had gotten under his skin so completely after only a day. - Only it hadn’t been a day. Kozik had been under his skin since the day the man had knocked him on his ass. Most of the time it was out of irritation, the rest was lust. He didn’t know which had pulled him in the first time, or the last. All he knew was that he couldn’t help but want more. It had been the promise of more that had made prison bearable. Though he’d never admit that to anyone, he barely felt comfortable admitting it to himself.

Tig groaned to himself and lifted the bottle of beer to his lips, taking a deep gulp. It was his fifth since getting home an hour ago, the empties scattering the table. He glanced at the clock. 3AM. He knew he should go to bed, he had to get up in the morning to work on the crates with the others, but the idea of going to bed alone was unappealing.

He’d been furious when what had started out as an excellent home coming had turned into a disaster. And he’d hated the fear that had gone through him when he’d thought that everything he’d been holding onto, everything that had gotten him home could be lost. He’d been so relived when Kozik had changed his mind. - And then it had gotten complicated and fucked up. He’d meant what he said to the younger man, he did know that something had changed between them. He’d known it before he’d even returned to Charming. Hell, he’d know before he’d gone. From the moment Kozik had stepped foot back in Charming, wanting his patch back.

He knew, and he suspected Kozik did too, that he’d only been so angry at him, bitching at him every five seconds because he hadn’t wanted to acknowledge how much he’d missed him. He could brush it off when Kozik was simply passing through. He could ignore him, but having him around all the time, he just wasn’t ready for that, or what it meant.

 

Things had been progressing that way before Missy, he knew it, the club knew it. But then he hadn’t cared. It was strange what eight years could do. Now, after losing Missy and everything he’d done since, the idea had freaked him out. Because the last thing he could afford was to lose his club. His eyes were drifting closed as his head fell back against the cushions. Then his phone buzzed on the table. Groaning again he reached for it.

 

Inbox: Kozik.

Are you still awake?

 

Tig smiled to himself, not bothering to text back; instead he scrolled down his contacts and hit call. It rang twice before the familiar warm sound of Kozik’s voice filled his ears.

“What the hell do you want?” Tig said, fighting a grin.

“Thought we could talk. “

“Talk?” Tig frowned.

“Yeah.”

“Where are the others?”

“Sleeping.”

Tig’s lip curled into a mischievous smirk and he shifted on the couch. “Oh, in that case, I think I could spare the time to talk.” he laughed and knew Kozik understood him when he sighed. - The next hour was well spent.

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

He couldn’t wait to get home. As Kozik helped Miles load another of the crates into the back of the van, he sighed. While Happy’s Mom was a lovely woman, who made them feel welcome, he couldn’t wait to get back to Charming. It had only been a few days, but after already having spent fourteen months separated from Tig, he’d expected to spend more than sixteen hours with him. But he had a job to do and you don’t argue with the president of the club.

 

He grunted as he lifted another create, his mind already turning towards his homecoming. It amazed him slightly that he could even walk, the way his jeans had suddenly grown too tight. If Miles noticed the strange way he was struggling to move, he didn’t say anything.

“Hey, dickhead, you the one made pancakes?” Happy called as he joined them in his mom’s backyard.

“Yeah.” Miles groaned back as he helped lift the heavy crate into the van.

“Gonna clean your shit up?”

“Now?”

“Yeah. Now.” Happy ordered. “Who you think’s gonna do it?”

“Your mom and aunt?”

“Ain’t your maids.”

“We should load these first.”

Kozik bit back a grin, listening to the pair. He knew him and Tig were a thousand times worst than them, but he didn’t much care if they sounded like an old married couple. “No, go. He hates mess.” he laughed.

Miles groaned at he turned to head back into the house.

“Get inside there.” Happy ordered, practically chasing Miles into the house.

 

Kozik laughed to himself as he pulled the back down on the truck. He turned at the sound of something being thrown over the fence. Turning he saw a basketball. Soon there was two heads poking over the top.

“Yo, Gomer. You wanna toss me that rock?” one of them called.

Kozik glared at the pair. “Yo, Buckwheat, wanna keep your shirt on?” he called back. He finished locking the back of the truck, before sweeping up the ball and throwing it back.

“Thanks.”

Kozik nodded and turned back to the house.

“Hey, you ball?” one of the kids called.

“No today.” he just wanted to get the truck filled so he could get back home.

“What’s the matter, surfer dude, scared of a little ‘hood ball?”

Kozik smirked a little.

“Come on, 10 bucks a point.”

“Shut up, bitch. You ain’t got no money.” the other kid commented.

“Bullshit.” the first one grinned, pulling out a wad of cash.

“How much you got?” Kozik asked, suddenly interested. It was going to take Miles a while to clean up the mess he’d made, and he could not only use the money, but the distraction too or he’d end up in the toilet bashing the bishop just to ease his frustration.

“Like, 300 and something.” the first kid replied, counting the cash.

Kozik glanced back at the house for a long second. “All right, me and you, LeBrown. One on one, Winner takes all.” he agreed, marching determinedly to the fence

“Shit, yeah, my lemon-headed sucker.” the kid grinned.

Kozik leapt over the fence with a grin on his face. Not knowing the shit that was going to come his way.

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

Tig stared as Bobby followed Clay out of the warehouse, his frustration growing by the second. He didn’t know what Clay’s problem was, mainly because the guy had barely said two words to him over the past few day, and it was beginning to get to him. He tried telling himself it was the stress over the new Cartel connections and the shit with the new sheriff, but somewhere deep inside a voice told him that wasn’t the real issue. There was only one thing that had really changed, Kozik.

 

It didn’t make much sense to him, Clay had been fine with him and Koz before, but this time it seemed to be causing problems. He didn’t get. Everyone else was acting just the same. The guys would wind him up about his relationship, but Clay seemed to get irritated when it was brought up. It wasn’t even like it was news to the guy.

 

Tig ground his teeth with annoyance. Well, if Clay was going to be like that, fine. What did he care? He’d just do his job as Sergeant at Arms of the SOA, and fuck his….moron, and if Clay Morrow didn’t like it? Tough shit.

 

The ringing of a phone drew his attention to Jax, watching as he spoke, or more accurately yelled, down the line. Hanging up with a curse.

“What’s going on?” Opie asked

“That was Miles. Some kind of hiccup with the guns.”

“Should I call Clay?” Tig asked with a concerned frown.

“No, him and Bobby need some quality time.”

Tig clenched his jaw tighter, grabbing his cut.

“Stay here; get the other prospects to help finish these up. - Take care of him.” Jax laughed as he pushed a suffering Chibs back down on the work bench.

 

Tig headed for the door. “I’m going with.” he announced.

“Clay wanted you to stay here.” Jax reminded him.

Turning sharply he meet the VP’s gaze. “I’m not gonna be his little ammo bitch. I’m not gonna do it. If there’s a problem with those guns, I should be there.” he said harshly, storming out of the building.

“All right, Tiggy.” Jax sighed, following after him.

 

He climbed onto his bike and stared the engine, his anger and frustration reaching boiling point. They were five miles away from the warehouse when he finally calm down, riding always did that. Then his thought’s turned to the man that would be at the other end of the journey and his insides tightened while relaxing him at the same moment. He’d only been gone a few days but they had been frustrating. He’d spent that time telling himself it was because he wanted a fuck, but he knew that wasn’t quite true. He actually missed the moron. If he was really honest, he’d missed him eight years ago when he’d left, but then he’d been so angry and grieving that he hadn’t allowed himself to notice it. Now he didn’t have that anger towards the blond, which made things difficult.

 

It wasn’t just the club, or more accurately Clay, that was weird, it was his own feelings. He’d be the first to happily admit he didn’t do love. He’d been burnt too many times for that, and he had to face it that he just wasn’t made for it. - But Kozik had been right when he’d said things had changed between them. That that last night together had been different. He wasn’t going to say the L word, but it certainly wasn’t just sex anymore. And he had to admit that scared him more than a little.

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

They arrived at Happy’s mom’s house an hour or so later. Miles met them out front, rushing to fill Jax in on what happened, probably desperate to cover his own ass. Tig groaned at the news that Kozik had lost their guns. He could already see the fury flooding the VP’s face.

“Where is he?” Jax snapped.

“Round back.” Happy nodded to the side gate.

Jax stormed off, Tig rushing to keep up, know this wasn’t going to end well.

“Someone stealing our guns is a hiccup?” Jax snapped the moment he saw the blond.

“You shitting me.” Tig added. He wasn’t exactly calm about the situation. After all, the last thing they needed was Clay on their asses. He knew the man would blame their ‘relationship’ for the screw-up, somehow.

“They thought the truck was full of booze. It had one case of AR-15s.” Kozik defended.

“Those guns are already sold, asshole!” Jax yelled. “The cartel is expecting _all_ of them in two days.”

“I get it!” Kozik yelled back.

Jax flipped, going for the blond in a fury. “No, what you get…”

Tig leapt forward, dragging Jax off his lover before he killed him. Opie dragging Kozik away in the opposite direction.

“….is jacked by a bunch of ghetto babies, asshole!” Jax added scornfully.

“Alright, Jax!” Tig yelled, pushing him further away as he went for the blond again.

“Let’s go!”

“Hang on!” Tig yelled to be heard.

“Save it for church!” Opie announced, pushing Kozik back.

“Let’s just get the guns back, bro.” Tig said a little calmer.

“They’re not gonna hit the streets with that shit.” Kozik said from a few feet away. “They’re gonna try and sell them.”

“Alright, shut up!” Jax snapped, trying to calm himself, turning to Happy.

Tig sent Kozik a warning stare that didn’t exactly have the impact he was meant to have when hidden behind sunglasses, but the blond seemed to get the warning, he sighed and dropped his gaze to his feet.

“This hood? Only one place to do that.” Happy said in his usual bland emotionless manner. Like losing a create of guns was no more of a problem than forgetting to pick milk up on a grocery run. “Vivica, French fence.”

“They better be there.” Jax warned, storming away from the yard.

As they followed after him, Tig walked at Kozik’s side. “What the fucking hell were you thinking?”

The blond glared at him. “I don’t need shit from you too.”

Tig stared at him but didn’t say anything back; instead he silently climbed on his bike, fastened his helmet and waited for Jax and Happy to lead the way.

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

It took them a little over an hour to locate the truck, then it was back to Happy’s mom’s place for the rest of the guns. Jax told Kozik to keep away from them, didn’t want them getting jacked again. Tig saw he was about to argue so he dragged his ass away.

“Calm the fuck down.” he ordered. “You screwed up man, what did you expect?”

Kozik glared at the slightly older man. “Thanks for the support.”

Tig grinned. “Hey, I could have let him rip you to pieces hours ago.”

Kozik shrugged, glancing over to his brothers. “He’s never going to trust me again.”

Tig rested his hands on his hips. “Aw, don’t be such a bitch. He’ll be fine.”

Kozik didn’t look convinced.

Tig frowned at the man. “Listen. When we get back to Charming there’s gonna be a vote.”

“What? Why? - Jesus, it was one fucking mis….”

“Not to do with you dip-shit.” Tig swallowed, knowing this wasn’t going to go down well. “The deal with the cartel…it’s more….”

Kozik’s brows drew together. “What?”

“It’s more complicated than we thought. The deal Clay made, it….they need us to run for them.”

“We do that anyway.” Kozik shrugged, not getting what the man was trying to say.

“Not guns.” he took a breath. “It’s guns for drugs.”

“What!” Kozik snapped in surprise. “Since when….? We don’t do drugs.”

“Now we do. - Or at least we will if the table vote with Clay.” Tig replied, scratching at his brow.

“Are you…? Stupid question. - You telling me to vote with Clay?”

Tig shrugged. “It’s not just Clay, it’s Jax too.”

“What?” the blonds’ eyes widened. “After everything that happened with his son, he’s up for that?” he shook his head disbelievingly.

Tig shrugged. “I don’t understand it either.” he murmured, staring over at the VP. “But if Jax is okay with it, then I guess we should be.”

Kozik stared at the back of Jax’s cut, confused and more than a little angry. “You can’t seriously expect me to vote for this?” he said after a few moments, turning back to the sergeant. “Not after everything I’ve gone through.”

Tig stared at his feet. If he had any choice he wouldn’t vote for it either, let alone expect Kozik, the ex-addict too. He nodded. “It would smooth things over with Jax, and Clay for that matter.”

Kozik shook his head. “I can’t Tig. - I know what that shit does to people.”

“I know, okay. I know. But we’re in some deep shit right now, we need the cartel. - Listen just think about it.”

Kozik still didn’t look convinced but he nodded.

“Oh, and might be a good idea to…you know…grovel.” he nodded towards the VP.

“I don’t grovel to anyone.”

Tig grinned wickedly. “Oh come on, we both know that’s not true.” he winked and laughed, dragging him off the picnic table. His arm remaining around the guys shoulder as he lead him to Jax. “You boys still love each other?”

Jax looked up at them for a moment, before a smile spread across his face. “Yeah.” he laughed, pulling Kozik into a man hug.

“Cool.” Kozik replied, hugging him back.

“It’s all about the happy ending.” Tig smiled.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, let’s go. Come on.” Opie moaned, rolling his eyes at the two blonds. “Got a vote to get to.”

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

 

“You’ve all had time to think on this. Yea or nay. We get in business with the Galindo Cartel?” Clay asked from the head of the table. “Yea.”

Tig watched Kozik as the president spoke, seeing the indecision on his face, he turned to look at his friend. Was he really going to agree to this? He’d never had a problem dealing guns, drags were different. He paused before giving his answer, turning the decision over in his head.

“Yea.” he finally murmured. Because what other option did he had. As Clay’s Sgt at Arms, he had to follow the man’s lead, no matter what. That was how the chain of command worked.

The rest of the table voted. Chibs, a ney. Opie and Miles both agreeing, Piney, apposing, not an unexpected move. Juice surprising them all with a no. Bobby siding with his conscience, no. Happy also voting against the president. The whole thing rested on Kozik.

Tig watched the man, watched him struggle with the decision. Part of him hoped he’d ignore his earlier request and vote no, then the whole thing would be void. He waited with baited breath for the blonds’ decision.

“Backing my pres and VP. Yea.”

Tig swallowed hard as he saw the pure self-loathing on the man’s face.

Jax cast his vote of yea and the gavel fell. Before the sound had even stopped ringing in the air, Kozik was out of his seat, heading for the door, Tig at his heels.

“Hey.” he called catching up with him.

Kozik didn’t look around, pausing at the bar, he took the bottle of beer offered. “Not now, okay.” he said, downing the bottle and marching over to the couch.

“Is he okay?” Jax asked from beside Tig.

The sergeant stared at his own beer. “He’ll be fine.”

“I appreciate the support. From both of you.” Jax said knowingly.

“Whatever.” Tig grumbled, marching away from the bar and taking a seat at a table.

Jax looked between the pair with a guilt on his face. He hadn’t expected Kozik to vote with him. With his history it was a certainty that he would be against the drug runs. Which meant that Tig had talked him round, which in turn had put a strain on them. As weird as it was seeing two of his club brothers together, he hated that Clay’s shit was screwing up their relationship. Sighing he turned back to the bar and grabbed his drink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I didn't write the phone-sex, I'm sure you're all disappoint but I have that planned for a later moment, and I don't want to repeat myself. - That and I'm not very good at it. I also apologize for the shortness of the chapter. I'm having a little case of writers block, but I'll try and keep the chapters coming as often as possible. Anyway, hope this chapter wasn't too disappointing.


	11. Chapter 11

They returned home early, a tension still hanging between them. They hadn’t really said anything to each other since Kozik sided with Jax and Clay on the cartel deal. Strolling into the house, Kozik headed straight to the bedroom, while Tig marched with purpose into the kitchen. The blond dropped his bag in the corner with a sigh, before turning and walking into the bathroom.

 

He stood in front of the mirror, looking at his reflection, the dark circles under his eyes. The day hadn’t turned out the way he’d wanted, in fact the week hadn’t. For months he’d been looking forward to Tig’s homecoming, as well as that of the other club members, he’d been looking forward to them returning to normal. This wasn’t anything close to normal. Not just the sudden change in Jax and the club but his relationship with Tig.

 

He wasn’t complaining really, but at the same time he was tired of all the tension, the stress, everything. All he wanted was for Samcro to be the same club he’d left nine years ago. And Tig to be the same man. But he’d change a lot since then. Kozik had his suspicions it had something to do with Opie’s old lady, and Tig’s role in her death.

 

Kozik turned on the shower and stripped quickly. Climbing under the water he hissed at the heat, but he didn’t bother altering it, instead he just let it flow, scalding his skin, washing away the grim from the ride home and the disgust he felt over the cartel deal. With his palms braced on the wall, Kozik bowed his head, closing his eyes he allowed the water to run over him, not caring about the scolding water. He felt sick to his stomach. Getting clean had been the second, no the third hardest thing he’d ever done. The first year after leaving Charming had been the worst of his life. He’d fallen in with the wrong girl. What had begun as an occasional joint to block out the pain had soon turned into something far more serious and dangerous thanks to Jen Cassidy. Amazingly he’d been able to hide his habit from the club, at least for the most part. Lord knew how? And he was pretty sure that if it hadn’t been for Bobby and Chibs, he’d probably have found himself six foot under.

 

Opening his eyes he glared down at the crook of his arm. The track marks had long since faded, but he knew where they were. His eyes could see them clear as day. His mind travelled back to that time, to Jen, the girl who’d helped ease the loneliness and pain, but who never quite filled the hole left by Tig and Missy. That was where the drugs came in. She’d been sneaky, easing him into that world before he’d realised. If he was honest, he hadn’t really cared; he’d already lost everything he cared about, what was his life?

 

And now here he was helping the club he trusted and believed in, a club that had been determined to get him clean, spread the same poison that had very nearly killed him. He wondered what the hell he’d been thinking siding with Jax and Clay? What they’d been thinking making the deal in the first place? - Had he been feeling guilty over almost losing the gun shipment? Or was it because Tig had asked him to? He feared the answer. But there was one thing he knew beyond a doubt, he hated himself.

 

Dipping his head once more he tried to let the water burn away that self hatred but it wasn’t working. He took a deep breath before pulling his fist back and slamming it into the wall, hard. He did it a couple more times, until the shower water was tainted red with his blood. Tears burnt his eyes and he turned them into the cooling water.

 

His breath hitched a few moments later at the touch of large firm hands on his damp skin, short nails digging into his hips and the scrap of short stubbly facial hair on his spine. There was a heavy silence, the only sound coming from the spray of water. Kozik waited for his lover to say something, to do something, but there was nothing but still silence.

 

The tension was too much. Kozik didn’t want silence, didn’t want calm. Lifting his battered, bleeding hand. He reached round to grasp at the older man’s hip, directly behind his own, pulling him close. Swallowing hard at the feel of the other man’s solid erection against his ass. It took him a few moments before his pounding heart allowed him to speak. “Fuck me. - Right now! Here!” he said, pressing backwards. It wasn’t a request, it was a demand. Spoken with a hard rough voice that seethed hatred.

 

Tig’s moment of hesitation surprised the blond, and for a moment he wondered if the man was going to do what he demanded. Of course he should have known, this was Tig after all. He silently sighed with relief as Tig lifted his hand from his hip and pressed his fingers against the tightness of Kozik’s rear. The long rough fingers worked swiftly but not for long, they were barely in there long enough to properly prepare him before they were gone and replace by the older man’s dick. Tig gripped Kozik’s waist in a firm biting hold as he pushed himself inside the tightness. Kozik closing his eyes tightly against the pain and pleasure that shot through his body. Tig didn’t give him the time to adjust, ploughing forward with hard unforgiving thrusts.

 

It was rough and fast and left Kozik breathless. When Tig shifted his hand to take hold of his lover’s painfully hard dick, the blond stopped him. If he was going to find his release it would come unassisted.

 

Tig took the hint and returned his hand to the blonds’ hip, his own snapping forward with punishing ferocity and speed. His hot breath ghosting over Kozik’s shoulders. This wasn’t the first time he’d fucked a guy in the shower, and it probably wouldn’t be the last, but it was the only time he hadn’t enjoyed it, unable to understand the uncomfortable feeling in the pit of his stomach. He counted the seconds till it was over. With that in mind he quickened his pace, coming sooner then either of them were expecting. At least if the disappointed moan the blond gave was any indication. Tig pulled out in time to coat Kozik’s ass and thighs with his cum, his head rested on the man’s left shoulder blade, panting into the damp skin, still buried inside him. He was about to pull out when Kozik stopped him with a firm hand to his ass, his nails biting into the flesh.

“Don’t stop.” it was part way between a demand and a plea, and Tig felt his stomach tighten at the sound.

 

The sergeant frowned into the muscled back of his lover, his heart pounding dangerously fast in his chest. As much as he hated to admit it, he doubted he had it in him to go again. Instead he reached around the large body once more, intending to finish the job manually, only to have his wrist caught by the man. Grunting he pulled free of the man, forcing him to turn and face him, staring into the blonds’ furious and almost broken gaze he dropped to his knees. Tig pinned Kozik’s arms to his side as he took as much of him into his mouth as he could. Neither noticing that the water had turned ice cold above them.

 

Tig drew a reluctant Kozik to his climax, grunting as the blond struggled against him. When Tig was sure there was no going back for the blond, he realised his arms. Kozik’s fingers instantly curled into the older man’s dark locks and Tig used his newly freed hands to push the man over the edge, inserting a finger into his already sore and battered behind. Kozik came only a few moments later, grunting and swearing. Cursing Tig a son of a bitch.

 

When he was done, Tig spate the cum into the shower water and climbed to his feet, as Kozik slumped against the wall breathless with his eyes closed to the world. The sergeant looked at him for a second before turning and exiting the shower, marching out of the bathroom wet and naked.

 

It took Kozik a few more minutes to regain his equilibrium. When his head had stopped spinning and his heart had returned to as close to normal as it could, he shivered and turned to face the cold spray. Reaching for the soap he quickly cleaned himself before finally stepping out. Wrapping a towel around his waist, he avoiding looking at his reflection in the bathroom mirror.

 

He walked into the bedroom to find Tig lying on the bed, sipping at a beer, still naked and by the way the lights gleamed on his skin, wet too. Kozik rolled his eyes as he moved towards the bed. He lowered himself to sit on the edge, hissing at the pain that shot through his ass. He stared down at his feet. “The sheets will get wet.” he said in a matter-of-fact monotone voice.

“Yep.” Tig grunted, his gaze fixed on the wall across the room.

“We can’t sleep in wet sheets.”

“There not wet, there damp. It’ll be fine.” Tig replied, his tone matching that of his lovers.

 

Silence fell between them for a few moments, the bed shifting slightly.

“How’s the hand?” Tig asked finally. “Remember you’re heading north day after tomorrow.”

Kozik looked down at his battered knuckles, flexing them. “They’ll be fine. Just bruised.”

“Good. - So….what was all that about?” he asked, taking another swig of his drink. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m all up for the rough and ready in the shower, but it’s not….you.”

Kozik’s head snapped around with a deep frown. “Meaning? - We’ve been rough a….”

“I meant that wasn’t you. In there.” Tig finally met the blue eyes. “I know how you like it.” there was a small smirk that couldn’t help pulling at his lips.

Kozik turned away, shrugging. “Things change.”

“Bullshit!” Tig snapped. “That….that was about the vote. You’re what….punishing yourself….or more precisely getting me to do it.”

Kozik stared at his hand, continuing to flex his pained fingers as another silence stretched between them. Anger bubbling under the surface of Kozik’s skin.

 

“You have no idea what I went through. You weren’t there. - That stuff almost killed me, and now you want me to help flood the streets with it. - And like a fucking dick I actually agreed. Is it really any wonder that I hate myself.” he snapped angrily, getting to his feet and marching over to the dresser where his things still lay.

 

Tig watched him move around the room, felt the hate and anger roll off him. He was wrong when he said he didn’t know what the drugs had done to him. He knew everything. He’d made sure of that. And if Kozik should hate anyone, it should be him, for asking the ex-addict to vote for the deal. - Or better yet, Clay for making it in the first place.

 

Getting up he yanked back the sheets and climbed under, settling his bottle on the nightstand. They had a day befor they’d be separated again, Kozik heading off to Washington, while he headed to Tucson. He didn’t want another fight, he was tired of fighting. Taking a breath he settled back against the pillow and watched as Kozik slipped on a pair of loose underwear, before turning and walking back to the bed. He yanked back the covers and settled down, his back to the sergeant. Tig watched the muscles in the strong broad back for a few moments before reaching over and switching off the light. Turning to face the window, away from his lover, he closed his eyes and waiting for sleep to come. - It was a long torturous wait.

 

 

 

 

~Can’t Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

 

Kozik groaned as the sunlight poured into the room, pulling him out of his peaceful sleep. Lifting his hand to block out the light he cringed as sharp stinging pain vibrated through his hand. Cracking an eye open he stared down at the battered and bruised remains of his fight with the shower wall the previous night and sucked in a breath. It probably wasn’t the best decision of his life, but considering what had lead up to it, who would blame him.

 

Stretching beneath the covers, he gave a sigh of contentment at the warmth radiating from beside him. Turning his head he stared at the mass of black hair against the blue cotton pillowcase, his chest tightening at the sight. Smirking to himself he shifted closer to the heat of his lover’s body, his hand tugging at the covers to reveal the man’s tanned naked form. His eyes scanned the subtle muscle, his hand following their trail.

 

Kozik rolled even closer, bracing himself so that he hovered over the older man’s body. He pressed his lips to the shell of Tig’s ear. “Tiggy.” he whispered in a low seductive voice. The man didn’t move or respond, he just continued to lay there, his face buried into the pillow. Kozik narrowed his gaze, biting lightly at the ear. When there was still response, he licked at the shell, and then trailed his tongue down Tig’s neck, shoulder and back. Sweeping alone the bumps of the man’s spin, all the way to the dip in his lower back. Kozik didn’t stop, but continued on slipping his tongue lightly between the crease of the man’s ass, pausing only for a few seconds to glance up at his lover, hoping to see some kind of reaction to his ministration but Tig was stubbornly still asleep, or at least playing at being asleep.

 

Kozik glared at him, he would have the man begging to be fucked. Shifting his weight further down the bed, the blond continued on, his tongue breaking free of the canyon of Tig’s ass to play at the place behind his balls, smirking when he thought he heard a sharp intake of breath. Looking up through his lashes he found Tig’s head still buried, seemingly unaffected, but Kozik knew better. He began licking his way back up the man’s body, back towards his ear. His hand stroking the man’s flanks gently. When he reached Tig’s ear he whispered again. “Tiggy. If you want me, you’re going to have to say so.”

There was nothing and Kozik clenched his jaw tight. Growing frustrated, the blond upped the stakes, reaching down between them to grasp his morning erection, moving it to press between the older man’s butt-cheeks, pushing against the tight ring of muscle, but not penetrating it.

“Come on Tiggy. If you want it, you’re going to have to open you’re eyes and beg.” Kozik whispered before dropping his mouth to suck on the man’s shoulder, biting at the flesh. When Tig still refused to speak, the blond pressed just a little harder, before rolling off and onto his back.

 

Finally there was a sound as Tig groaned at the loss of Kozik’s weight. “Don’t fuck about!” he snapped.

A bright white grin spread across the blonds face. “I’m not fucking. That’s the point.”

“I’m _not_ joking moron.”

Kozik rolled, leaning over the other man’s shoulder. “You want me?”

Tig cracked open an eye and glared up at him.

“Then say it.”

Tig’s lips turned into a thin pale line.

“If you want me to fuck you into the bed….you’re gonna have to beg for it, Tiggy.”

 

The pair stared at each other for a long moment. Suddenly Tig’s hand gripped tight at the blond head of hair, pulling him down into a deep filthy kiss, before grumbling against the other man’s mouth. “I want you to fuck me. Hard. Now.”

Kozik grinned. “Magic word, Tinkerbelle.”

There was a long tense silence. “ _Please_.” Tig growled out.

Kozik release a burst of laughed, as he shifted his body over his black hair lover, reaching for the nightstand drawer to retrieve the condoms and lube. Falling back onto his knees he quickly slipped on the condom and coated himself with enough lube that it was practically dripping off. Slicking up two fingers he went to work, stretching out Tig as quickly as both of them could stand.

 

Finally after only a few moments Kozik moved, pulling Tig up onto his knees and thrusting into him with desperation. Tig let out a groan of satisfaction at the action, one hand fisting at the pillow his face was pressed into, while the other reached around to claw at his lover’s thigh and hip. Kozik’s own fingers biting into the hard bone of the man’s waist.

 

They moved together, Tig meeting each thrust with a deep animalistic groan. Pulling his hand away from Kozik’s flesh he reached for his throbbing erection only to have his progress halted when Kozik took a hard grip of his wrist.

“No.” the man panted. “I…have…other…plans.” he growled into Tig’s ear, his body pressed flush against the sergeants back as he continued to thrust fast and deep.

 

They kept going at the punishing pace until Kozik felt himself getting closer to coming. After three more thrusts he was pouring himself into the condom yelling. “ _Aaaalex_!!!!!” he grunted as his body shook through the orgasm until finally he collapse on top of Tig, flattening the man against the bed. Fighting to catch his breath, it took Kozik a few moments before he was able to move. Rolling off of the sergeant finally, to grin up at the ceiling.

 

He didn’t get much time to relax. Tig flipped himself over and elbowed the blond in the ribs. “Don’t you fucking think about leaving me like this.” he snapped, staring down at himself.

 

Kozik cracked an eye open and his grin widened as he followed Tig’s gaze to the thick throbbing red muscle pressed against the man’s stomach. “What do you want?”

 

Tig narrowed his eyes, causing Kozik to laugh as quickly he rid himself of the condom, tying and fling it blind in the direction of the trash can. Reaching back into the nightstand he pulled out another, swiftly rolling it onto Tig’s overly sensitive dick. The man hissing at the discomfort the act brought, fighting to stop himself from coming too soon. With the condom in place, Kozik rose onto his knees and searched around for the lube he’d discarded a while ago. Finding it, he quickly coated his fingers before reaching around to slowly prepare himself, not taking his eyes of Tig.

 

The sergeant watched the display with blazing dark eyes, his breath coming it shallow laboured pants as he continued to fight the desire for release. Swallowing hard every few seconds as Kozik’s groan perversely in front of him.

“G-get on w-with it!” snapped Tig breathlessly.

Kozik grinned, removing his fingers and swing a leg over the older man waste. “What do you want?” he asked, hovering frustratingly over Tig.

The sergeant narrowed his eyes. “To fuck you senseless.”

“I’ll hold you to that.” Kozik chuckled, lowering himself down onto Tig’s dick, both men sucking in a breath as he did so.

 

Tig shifted his feet to give himself purchase to thrust up, grunting with frustrations at the lack of friction. Kozik braced his weight on his knees, rocking back to meet the thrusts that weren’t fast or deep enough for either of their liking. Tig grunted angrily, lifting himself off the bed and forcing the larger man to the side. Kozik tumbled sideways onto his back, his head lulling off the edge of the bed as Tig grabbed his thigh, his unkempt nails biting into the tanned flesh as it was thrown over the older man’s shoulder.

 

In the new position Tig was able to find the friction and purchase he needed, allowing his hips to thrust forward in harsh rough movements, the bed the only thing protesting. The creaking sound mingling with both men’s grunts of pleasure and pain. Sweat glistened on both their bodies, the heat in the room climbing like they were trapped in a mid-summer heat wave. Tig was close; Kozik could feel it through his own body, causing the man’s grunts and moans to become more frequent. He reached up and tugged harshly at the older man’s hair, pulling his down into a rough, heated kiss that was all teeth and tongue. After only a few moments, Tig pulled away to stare down at his lover, Kozik not allowing him to create too big a space between them. Tig was reaching his climax, and Kozik could feel his second closing in.

“Ahh….Ahhh….K-K….” Tig grunted; his head rolling back as he quickened his pace.

Kozik yanked on the sergeant’s hair once more, forcing him to look at him again. “M-my n-na-me. Ca-ll m-y _name_!” he said between breaths.

Tig frowned down at him, his jaw clenched almost painfully tight.

 

Kozik had no idea why he did it, why he needed to hear his name, just once on Tig’s lips, but it looked like the man was going to refuse him that gift. Probably for some shitty fucking reason like not wanting this to be real. Cause a name, a real name. That meant something. At least to Kozik.

 

He felt Tig’s body begin to shake as he pistoned into him at speed, his hands gripping tight at Kozik’s thighs. Kozik’s fingers curled into the sheets, moaning nonsense into the silent room, allowing the pleasure Tig was providing to block out the ache in his chest.

“Ahh….God…” Tig panted between thrusts. “Oh….fucking…God…B…Be…Ben!” he yelled as he came.

Kozik’s eyes shot open to stare up at the man above him, his heart pounding as he followed Tig over the precipices.

 

Tig dropped forward onto Kozik, limp and breathless, his breath and facial hair brushing the man’s neck. He lay there only for a few moments before pulling himself free and rolling onto his back, staring up at the ceiling.

 

They continued to lay in silence as they came down from the high. Tig shifting around on the bed so that his head could rest against the pillow, Kozik quickly following suit. The blond glanced over at his lover to see Tig laying with a satisfied grin on his face and his arm behind his head.

“Now that’s how a guy should get woken up on a Sunday.”

Kozik couldn’t stop the arrogant grin that spread over his face. “Glad you enjoyed it.”

Tig turned slightly, meeting the man’s eyes. “Certainly beats a deafening bell.” he smirked before leaning over and surprising them both by actually kissing the other man slowly.

 

They kissed like that until they needed breath. Tig pulling away reluctantly and staring into Kozik’s blue eyes. “If you tell anyone I just did that….I’ll…cut your fucking balls off.” he threatened.

Kozik chuckled. “Don’t worry sweetheart, as far as anyone outside this room knows, you fucked me into the mattress and then made me sleep on the couch. Naked. With no covers.”

Tig narrowed his gaze. “Call me fucking sweetheart again, and that’ll be true.” he said in a low voice, rolling off the bed. “I need to pee.” he announced like it was the most important moment in world history.

Kozik chuckled as he watched Tig swagger - yes, swagger. - to the bathroom. His bare ass just a little red. The sighted gave Kozik a sense of triumph and he dropped back onto the pillow feeling exceedingly pleased with himself. The worries of the previous day forgotten.

 

He groaned when Tig’s phone began to ring on the nightstand. Rolling over with a wince, Kozik answer it without a thought of who might be on the other end, or how he’d explain answering his ‘brothers’ phone this early in the morning.

“Hello. Tig’s phone.”

“Kozik?” Gemma’s voice rang down the line.

“Yeah.” he swallowed nervously. He wasn’t sure why, it wasn’t like everyone didn’t know what was happening between him and Tig.

“Family dinner. One O’clock.”

Kozik nodded. “Okay.” he knew better than to argue. It wasn’t a request, it was an order.

“Sure you boys can ride and walk?” Gemma said with amusement and Kozik flushed.

“We’ll be there.”

“Good. See you later. Have a fun morning.” she laughed before hanging up.

 

“Who was that?” Tig asked from the doorway, a cigarette and two bottles of beer in his hand.

“Gemma. We’re ordered to dinner at one.” Kozik replied, shifting up on the bed.

“Oh.” Tig nodded, not looking at all pleased about the development.

“Is it okay? - Though if you don’t want to go, your telling her.”

“No, it’s fine.” Tig replied, handing over the bottle as he climbed back onto the bed and stared at the wall opposite.

“Are you sure?”

Tig turned to meet his lover’s eyes. “Sure…. just… well was kinda hoping to stay in bed, relax.” he said meaningfully.

“Oh.”

“But we can’t defy Gem.”

“No.” Kozik sighed.

They were silent for a long while before Kozik broke it.

“But we only have to stay for dinner, right?”

Tig looked at him. “Yeah.”

“And it’s not till one.” Kozik’s voice dropped as he glanced at the nightstand clock.

“Good point.” Tig nodded.

“So we could…..well….go for a run.” Kozik laughed. “Maybe tune the bikes?”

“Moron.” Tig snapped, flinging his beer over the man, only to bow over him to lap it up.


	12. Chapter 12

Tig shrugged into his cut and glanced over to the bed where Kozik sat pulling on his boots. He really didn’t want to do this, he wanted to just stay in and watched TV, drink beer and maybe fuck Kozik some more. Instead he was going to be heading over to Clay and Gemma for a large family dinner. It wasn’t the first he’d attended. Gemma loved having everyone around and after them being out of commission for the past year and a bit, Gemma obviously wanted to keep them close. He just wished it wasn’t today. Kozik had only just gotten back from Oakland and tomorrow he was heading off to Washington, while Tig headed to Tucson.

 

He knew how fucking pathetic it sounded, and hated it, but couldn’t help wanting to spend a little time with his lover. They hadn’t exactly had smooth sailing since his release. Tig grunted as he strapped on his knife.

“You alright?”

“Fine.” Tig replied coldly.

“Listen, if you don’t want to go, just call Gemma and tell her.”

Tig sent him a disbelieving look. “Sure, you do that.”

Kozik swallowed. “Me? Nuh, I said _you_ called her. Do I look suicidal to you?” Kozik smirked.

Tog nodded his head and fidgeted with his belt. “Lets just get this over with.” he sigh, turning for the door, but was halted when Kozik grabbed his arm.

“What’s wrong?”

“I said I’m fine.”

“Right. Fine.” Kozik grunted, staring at Tig with a raise sceptical brow. “Just fucking tell me, already. - Is this about what happened yesterday? About the vote?”

Tig frowned up at him. “No.”

“Then wha…” Kozik’s back grew stiff. “Ah…this.” he gestured between them and Tig clenched his jaw and looked away. “You don’t want me to go?” the blond said in a low voice.

Tig’s gaze snapped up to stare at the blond. “Why would…”

“This isn’t the first time I’ve been to Sunday dinner at Gemma’s you know. I ate there a lot while you were inside. - Ah, but never as your….what…bitch?”

Tig’s confused gaze turned rock hard as he glared. “You’re not my bitch!” he snapped.

Kozik huffed.

“Look I just didn’t want to do this today okay.” Tig said reluctantly.

The blond watched him. “Why?”

“Because.” Tig shrugged, attempting to leave the room again.

“Hey.” Kozik tightened his fingers around the older man’s bicep. “Why?”

“Look, we’ve had a lot of shit thrown at us over the last few day and a truckload more heading our way, I just wanted one fucking god damned day to myself.” Tig snapped growing angry and frustrated. “I just didn’t want to deal with club shit. I just wanted to sit on the couch, watch the fucking game, and just enjoy the peace for one fucking day.”

 

Kozik’s hand dropped away and he lowered his eyes, staring silently at the dirty grey carpet. “Right. Well I could go on my own.” he sighed, moving around the older man. “I’ll tell Gemma that you aren’t well. Let you relax.” he strolled out of the room, Tig right behind him.

“Hey.” Tig grabbed the back of his cut. “I meant both of us, fuck brain.”

“Huh?”

Tig rolled his eyes at the man and grunted. “Jesus, all those fucking drug must have really fucked up your brain. I fucking meant for us to relax. Jesus…I’m beginning to sound like a fucking old lady or something.”

Kozik couldn’t stop the grin spreading over his face. “Oh.” he cooed. “So you wanted to spend the day with me.”

Tig’s blue eyes narrowed. “Don’t get any fucking idea, moron.”

Kozik took a step into the sergeant’s personal space. “Me ideas? I leave that up to you sweetheart.” he dropped a caste kiss on Tig’s lips, receiving a punch to the shoulder for his trouble. “Come on honey, let’s go….” he laughed, heading for the door. “The soon we get there, the sooner we get back and you can fuck me on the kitchen table.”

Tig’s lips twitched. “We don’t have a kitchen table.”

“Semantics.”

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

They arrived at the Marrow house just as dinner was being finished up. It looked like Gemma had invited everyone. Everyone turned as they strolled in and Tig saw the smirk on Jax’s face.

“Glad to see you can still walk up right.” the VP said with a laugh, his gaze flickering between the pair.

“Blow me.” Tig grinned and he joined the group in the den.

“Hey.” Kozik snapped, punching him hard on the shoulder. “At least wait until after dinner. - He’ll need to loosen up first.”

 

Jax stared up at the blond with wide eyes as Kozik rolled his jaw, rubbing at it. There was a long silent moment before Jax burst into laughed. Tig seemed to relax instantly, dropping down on the couch next to Chibs and Juice, Kozik lent against a door frame across the room. As much as their brothers were alright with what was going on, at least outwardly, Kozik knew he had to walk a line. Making jokes about their love-lives was one thing, sex was sex and no one cared much one way or another. But he knew being all touching feely old lady with the sergeant at arms wouldn’t go over with the same ease.

 

He couldn’t help watching Tara and Jax as they sat on the floor of the den with the kids, practically wrapped around each other. Jax kissing the dark haired doctor lovingly, no consideration for those around them because they didn’t need to have any. Kozik could only image how they would react if he kissed Tig like that. - Not that the sergeant would let him. Hell he couldn’t even sit next to him for fear of making things awkward.

 

He dragged his gaze away from the couple as Tara got to her feet to go help Gemma in the kitchen, and it instantly fell on Tig, who from the looks of it was trying not to look at him.

“Want a beer?” Jax asked as he followed after Tara like a lost puppy.

“Huh, yeah, thanks.” Kozik nodded with a smile.

“Tig? Beer?”

“Stupid question.”

Kozik watched after Jax, as he strolled into the kitchen close behind Tara, his hands never leaving her till he reached the fridge. He pulled open the door and retrieved the two bottles, before turning and pulling Tara to him, kissing her. Kozik swallowed hard, wanting to look away, wanting to glance over at Tig.

“Sickening, ain’t it?”

Kozik turned to find Bobby stood next to him. “Totally. - But I guess that’s what happens when you’re in love. Completely lose the concept of decorum.” he forced a laugh.

“Huh.” Bobby grunted. “Like you know what decorum is? I still remember your time prospecting.” he winked, laughing. “At least she’s not getting him off in there were we all could see.”

Kozik felt the heat climb up his face, into his cheeks, which only made Bobby laugh harder as he went to join Gemma.

 

“Alright, you lot. Get your ass in here! Clay!” Gemma yelled from the large dinner table.

“What was all that about?” Tig asked as he strolled at Kozik’s side into the dinning area.

“Huh?”

“With Bobby?”

“Oh. We were discussing decorum, and you’re lack there of.” Kozik laughed, pulling up a chair.

 

Tig glanced around the table and found every seat occupied except for the one next to Kozik. Reluctantly he took a seat, his leg brushing his lovers briefly and once again reminding him that this was _not_ where he wanted to be. He turned his head as Clay strolled in from wherever he’d been hiding himself and clenched his jaw as his best friends gaze scanned the table and settled on him and Kozik. He didn’t fail to notice the look on the man’s face as he stood by the large roast. Tig shifted as Clay attacked the meat, sawing it. He didn’t want him there, or maybe more accurately he didn‘t want him there with Kozik.

 

No one else seemed to notice, so Tig tried to ignore it, as the plates were passed along the table, swiftly followed by the vegetables. Everyone seemed at ease, though maybe there was a slight cloud of tension over the table. Conversation was varied and tended to stay away from club business. Opie’s kids told Gemma about school. Tara talked about the hospital. Chibs, Bobby and Jax talked about the repairs to the club - after the new Sheriff decided a few days earlier to throw his weight around and smash up the place with an axe. - Then the conversation turned towards Tara and Jax’s engagement. All the while Tig just sat there, forcing food down his dry closed off throat, wishing Clay would stop staring at him from the other end of the table.

 

Tig didn’t get nervous, he got agitated, and that was what caused him to drop his fork. He groaned to himself as he pushed the chair back and crouched down to fetch the silver cutlery.

“Hey!”

His eyes lifted over the edge of the table to Gemma.

“Don’t think I don’t know what you’re up too. No blowjobs at the dinner table.” She warned with a laugh, waving her own fork back and forth.

Everyone laughed and Tig quickly snatched up the implement, pulling his chair back against the table.

“Then maybe you should put more salt on the potatos.” he winked at her, grabbing Kozik’s thigh hard suddenly, causing him to jump.

“Great, thank for that.” Juice complained, dropping his forkful of potato mash, with a disgusted face.

“Oh please. Like you don’t enjoy salt once and a while.” Chibs teased, throwing a roasted potato at the boys face from across the table.

“Not as much at Tig.” Jax added. “Hate to think what his blood pressures like.”

“As long as it gets were it’s needed, I ain’t complaining.” Tig countered with a wink.

“Yeah, neither Koz.” Opie laughed, kicking the blond beneath the table causing the msn to almost choke on a piece of beef.

“Jesus man. Would have thought you’d lost your gag reflex by now.” Jax laughed, looking between the pair with a wicked grin.

Kozik swallowed hard, took a gulp of water before answering the jib. “Maybe if he hadn’t gotten himself locked up for a year, I would have.”

“But it’s way better when you gag.” Tig grinned lustfully at the blond to his left.

“Okay, okay. Cool it.” Clay said from the end of the table. “We’ve got kids here.”

Tig looked over at his best friend, as the laughter died and normal conversation resumed.

 

 

 

 

~~Can’t Get Rid of You~~

 

 

 

It was three in the afternoon when the pair strolled back into their place. It had taken some effort to get away from Gemma, and they’d receive a shower of lurid comments and cat calls as they’d bid farewell to their brothers. Tig had seen the look Clay had sent their way as they left and it clawed at his insides, but he wasn’t going to let it get to him.

 

Kozik swung the door closed behind him and dropped down onto the couch like a sack of potatoes. His head rolling back against the cushion with a wary sigh. Tig headed for the kitchen to grab them two cold beers before lowering himself down next to the blond.

“Glad Gemma didn’t make us stay. There’s only so much roasting a man can put up with.” Kozik laughed, excepting the cold bottle while reaching for the TV control.

“Now you know why I didn’t want to go.” Tig grumbled, slouching low on the seat, lifting his booted feet onto the coffee table.

“I thought you didn’t want to go because you wanted to spend the day fucking me into the mattress.” he laughed, not taking his eyes off the screen.

A smile finally tugged at Tig’s lips. “That too.”

 

He’d been stressing out all afternoon. Never really feeling at ease around his club brothers. It was actually strange; he’d never had a problem before. He didn’t want to think it was because of Kozik. He didn’t want to think that they knew that things had changed between them. That he’d changed. And he had. Ever since he’d screwed up with Donna he’d been different. He’d been carrying around a level of guilt he didn’t think he’d ever get rid of.

 

He glanced over at the blond beside him, the man’s attention fixed on a NASCAR race. Tig wasn’t the sentimental type but he couldn’t help but be grateful and maybe a little pathetic over the man’s return. He’d needed something, someone. That was probably why he’d almost slept with Gemma. As much as he loved her, that hadn’t been why he’d done it. He hated to admit it, but she’s been a convenience. They’d both been buckling under a painful weight and like a magnet it had drawn them together.

 

Thankfully he’d come to his sense before anything had really happened and he’d continued carry that weight. Then fate, or the universe, or maybe just plan luck had stepped in and dropped Kozik back into his lap. Right when he’d needed him the most. Of course he’d fought against it, he didn’t want to admit even to himself that he’d missed the blond idiot, but there was only so much denial a man could do. And Tig had never been very good at denying himself what he really wanted. - And he’d wanted Kozik almost from the moment they’d met ten years ago.

 

Tig’s arm stretched out along the back of the couch as he continued to puzzle over the change in his life. It seemed that his head was determined to meditate on the meaning of life. Especially his. A small voice in the back wondered if his history of failed marriages and relationships had anything to do with his current situation. Sure he hadn’t even known Kozik when he’d married Bethany or Colleen. But maybe they hadn’t worked for him because he wasn’t being himself, not really. Sure he’d slept around, with anything at hand and everyone from his ex to his club knew about his bizarre habits, but it had only ever been sex, he’d never actually allowed himself to care. And while he loved his wives, well while he’d had them at least, he’d never really been in love with them. He just didn’t think he was capable of it. He was too hard, too broken to care that deeply about anything that wasn’t his club. - Well, and Missy.

 

Tig frowned as he took in his lovers profile. He couldn’t deny it though; he cared about Benjamin, more than he thought himself capable of, and probably more than he should. He wasn’t going to say he was in love with the man, because he’d already establish he wasn’t able to be in love with anyone, but having Kozik in his life did give him an insane sense of peace he hadn’t thought possible. He hadn’t been haunted by the nightmare since Kozik’s return; he hated and loved arguing with him at the same moment. And he hadn’t even thought about looking elsewhere for a fuck.

 

Tig’s stomach cramped, but it was probably the large meal he hadn’t long eaten. Turning his head, he fixed his sight on the television screen and tried to stop his mind from working. His heart jumped into his throat when a heavy weight pressed against his side, and he turned wide eyes to stare as Kozik curved his upper body into him. The man’s head dropping back to rest on his shoulder. Tig’s heart pounded painfully against his ribs and he was sure he was going to pass out from lack of oxygen. His gaze still locked on the mass of blond gelled hair only inches from his face.

“Comfy?” he said with a tight breathless voice.

“Hmm.” Kozik nodded, seemingly unaware of the havoc he was causing. “You?”

Tig didn’t answer, didn’t know how to. He was comfy? He was also uncomfortable and freaking the fuck out at the same time.

 

Kozik pulled away a little, looking up to meet Tig’s deep blue eyes. “You okay?” he asked with a frown, before nodded, suddenly understanding something that Tig didn’t even understand. He prepared to move away from the older man, but was stopped by a hand on the back of his neck.

Tig shook his head, holding him still. Surprising them both with his reluctance to let Kozik abandon him. There was a drawn out, breathless silence before Tig pulled him close, pressing their lips together in a surprisingly gentle kiss, that while quickly growing deeper and more passionate, still held that softness to it.

 

Kozik shifted closer, pressing himself back into Tig’s side, his hand blindly depositing his beer on the coffee table, before it took up a natural and comfy position on Tig’s thigh, squealing it lightly as Tig’s tongue swept across his pallet and teeth.

 

Tig’s fingers combed and curled around the blond greased strands of his lover’s hair, tugging it as much as he could. His other hand wrapping into the man’s cut, pulling him closer, wanting him closer. The couch shifted under Kozik’s weight as he manoeuvred himself to straddle Tig’s lap, his hips grinding down against the man’s hardened groin. Tig’s hands gripping the side of the man’s neck, his thumbs rubbing lazily at his jaw as he lost himself in the moment. Tig had never really been one for just kissing, never really saw the appeal. It was usually just a way to seduce some chick into letting him get between her thighs. Now he had to admit he got it. He couldn’t say why, he just knew he didn’t want to stop.

 

The room filled with deep moans, merging with the sound of screeching tires and crushing metal. The whole world outside of that room forgotten, just as Tig had wanted.

 

Cuts and shirts were abandoned while they made-out like horny teenagers. Only coming up for air when they needed to or when Kozik decided he wanted to mark Tig as his own. Sinking his teeth into the side of his neck and sucking a deep red bruise onto the flesh. Panting he pulled back to admire his work with a smug cocky grin.

“Maybe you should get that tattooed there permanently. Just so you don’t forget.” he said in a lustful husky voice.

Tig stared up at him with a raised brow, his hands cradling the larger man’s hips. “Do I look like the matching tattoo type to you?” he grumbled, his voice rough.

Kozik’s grin grew. “Actually, now you mention it.” he nodded. “We both know you’re a pussy cat under all this Tiggy.” he ran his hand over the man’s chest and stomach, rocking his hips in the process.

Tig narrowed his gaze, growling in the back of his throat. “I know what your doing?” he said finally. “If you want me to get my claws out, just ask.” dragging his nails down the man’s back, causing him to hiss.

 

Kozik leant forward, licking the shell of Tig’s ear. “You promised me the kitchen table.” he whispered seductively.

“We don’t have a kitchen table.” Tig reminded him.

“Guess I’ll have to make do with the coffee table then.”

Tig grinned at the block of wood. He doubted it would hold their weights, but he was all up for finding out. Gripping Kozik’s hips, he shoved him off his lap. Kozik scrambled to his feet quickly, his hands working at his belt and jeans. Tig impatiently yanking them down the man’s thighs, before spinning him roughly around and forcing him to bend, Kozik’s palms flat against the wood.

 

Tig swung an arm over the surface, knocking everything off the top before pushing Kozik further, till his bare chest was touching the polished wood, before quickly stripping out of his own jeans and dropping to his knees.

 

To both men’s surprise, considering how turned on and close to the edge they were, Tig took his time. Not just in his preparation, but in the act itself. Savouring every touch of flesh, every moaned word. When it was over the pair slumped down on the couch, exhausted and at ease. Kozik’s head lulling back onto Tig’s shoulder, Tig’s hand brushing thoughtless circles into his shoulder, as they watched TV in silence.


	13. Chapter 13

 

Tig just wanted to be at home. Something he’d never thought he’d want this badly. He saw the same feeling mirrored by Jax across the bar. It wouldn’t have been so bad if Kozik had been part of their road-trip but he‘d been sent north with Opie. He knew he sounded like a whiny old lady or worse a love-stick high schooler, but what could he do. He was lost and he knew it.

 

It also wouldn’t be so bad if Clay wasn’t bitching at him every five seconds, sending him suspicious looks. Yeah, he definitely wanted to be at home, in his own bed, a sexy blond with a body to kill for beside him. He groaned to himself and took another deep gulp of his Jack Daniels. Forty eight hours, that’s all he had to do, then he’d have that.

 

He ordered another beer and settled into one of the dark corners. He could feel club members watching him, knew what they were thinking, but right then he couldn’t give a shit. He’d done a lot for the club over the last couple of years, more than at any other time; he was entitled to have something. An escape. A retreat. He was entitled to have what the others had, what Clay, and Jax and Opie had. Someone who seemed to actually care about him. That was something Tig realised he hadn’t had in a long time.

 

He let his head drop back and played with the idea of sneaking off to call Kozik. But that would only bring more problems, especially with Clay. And the Tucson charter were watching them just a little too closely for his liking, they couldn’t be seen to be weak. It was bad enough that Bobby was giving Clay and Jax a hard time at every opportunity. So no, sneaking off to talk to his male lover wasn’t on the cards.

 

He opened his eyes when he felt someone hovering over him and was met with the sight of a pretty Latino. He narrowed his gaze at her while forcing a smile.

“Clay said you might like some company.”

Tig shot a glance over to the far end of the bar where Clay was sat with the SAMTAS president. They locked gazes and Tig knew it was in some way a weird test. Like he had to prove he was still who he was. Swallowing hard he nodded for the girl to sit down next to him. The moment she took the seat her hands were all over him, squeezing his thigh while her mouth worked at the curve of his neck. His body reacted like it always did. Sex was sex after all. And Tig loved sex. But inside he wasn’t feeling the high.

 

He closed his eyes once more and let his head drop back again, breathing through his nose while clenching his jaw. It surprised and in a way disgusted him that he had to fight the desire to push her away. But he needed to go with it. Clay was already struggling with his change in circumstance, he feared what would happen if he gave into his uncharacteristic emotions.

 

The girl moved to straddle him, rocking her hips while continuing to kiss his neck and jaw, when his phone began to ring in his pocket. He answered it on instinct, not even looking at the screen.

“Yeah?” he grunted, his voice rough as sexual adrenalin rippled through his body.

“Hey, fucker. How’s Tucson?”

Tig’s heart skipped humiliatingly, and his hips rocked forward against the girl above him. His dick instantly hardening at the sound of that deep cocky voice. He had to take a couple of shaky breaths before he could talk. “Fine.”

 _“Just fine?”_ Kozik pressed, his smile clear from his tone. _“What you doing?”_

Tig’s eyes shifted to stare at the girl who was sliding down his body towards the floor, where she knelt, her finger working at his belt.

 _“Or should I ask who your doing?”_ Kozik laughed. And Tig felt a blanket of heat burn his neck.

“What makes you think I’m doing anyone.” he whispered, his gaze flickering to the bar where the others were concentrating on their own conversations. Thankfully.

“Oh I don’t know. Maybe because I know you. So who is she?”

Tig turned his attention to the girl at his feet, as she pulled him free of his pants.

 _“Or is it a he?”_ Kozik asked. This time his voice was tight. Tig recognized it instantly. It was his I’m-jealous-but-I’m-still-a-tough-fucking-biker-so-I’m-not-going-to-say-anything voice. The one he’d used when he’d come home from Stockton talking shit.

“ _She’s_ got my dick in her mouth as I’m…ahhh.” he trailed off when the girl drew her teeth up the sensitive muscle.

“Huh. Sounds like you’re enjoying yourself.”

The jealousy was gone, mostly and Tig couldn’t help but wonder if it was more the idea of him fucking another guy that pissed Kozik off, than him fucking someone else in general.

 

“It’s…..fine.” Tig replied.

 _“As good as mine?”_ Kozik asked; his voice lower and gravely. Sex practically seeping off it.

“Never.” Tig groaned, his head falling back against the cushion.

“Oh?”

Tig moaned slightly as the Latino worked her magic on his dick.

“God, I love listening to you moan. It gets me so hard.”

Tig moaned again and grinned when Kozik moaned back.

“Are you touching yourself?” Tig asked in a low husky whisper. His head shooting up when the girl at his feet stop. “Hey.” he snapped at her, glaring until she went back to her job.

“What happen, she stop?”

“Yeah.” Tig replied, returning his head to the restful position. “Now answer me.”

“Of course I’m touching myself.”

Tig moaned again, grinning from ear to ear.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No!”

Kozik laughed down the line and Tig growled.

“Are you being rough?”

“Of course. I’m imagining it’s you after all.”

“Use your nails.”

Kozik groaned filthily as he followed Tig’s instructions.

“Are you in bed?”

“On it.”

“Stripped?”

 _“Totally naked.”_ Kozik smirked. Tig could hear it in his voice.

“Good. - Stop.”

 _“Why?”_ Kozik whined.

“I want you to finger yourself.”

 

The girl pulled away again, looking up at him with a wide eyes and confusion. Tig didn’t bother looking at her, he just wrapped his fingers in his long dark hair and pushed her head back to his crouch, and thankfully she went. She wasn’t a date, she wasn’t an old lady, she was just a crow-eater and that meant she did as she was told and didn’t complain. And if that meant sucking a member off while he had phone sex with his lover, that was how it went.

 

“No lube.” Tig growled in warning.

 _“Wouldn’t think of it.”_ Kozik replied breathlessly. His harsh grunts telling Tig that he was pushing a finger into the tight ring of muscle.

“How’s it feel.”

“It hurts. I’m so tight. - Not having you inside me the past few days.”

“I’ll make up for that when I get home.” Tig promised.

“Really? How?”

“I’m going to fuck you into next week.”

 _“Oh. That….ahhh….sounds soooo…oohhh…gooood.”_ Kozik panted.

“I’m going to shove my dick so far up your tight little arse that you’ll choke on it.”

“Ahhh. God. Yes.”

“I’m gonna ride you so hard till your screaming for me to stop.”

“Never.”

“You’ll be begging.”

“Nuhhh.”

“I’m going to tie you down. Your face buried deep into the pillow as I fuck you. Rough. No preparation. And I won’t stop till your battered and bruised and unable to walk or ride for a month.”

 

Tig’s hips thrust up into the crow-eater’s mouth as he spoke, taking him closer to his climax. Heat pooling in his stomach with every moan Kozik made. The sounds telling him the blond was just as close as he was.

“And when I can’t fuck your ass anymore, I’ll shove my dick into you mouth and fuck that instead.”

 _“Go….od….Ahhhhleeexxxx!”_ he yelled so load down the line it hurt Tig’s ears.

 

But it also sent the man over the edge himself. “Fuuuuuckkk. Kooo…” he snapped his jaw close, clenched it tight to stop from yelling out his lover’s name. Not wanting to draw any more attention than he already had. He shot his load, holding the Latino head in place, forcing her to take everything he had. Spent, he let her go, shoving her away, more roughly than he intended, and let his body go limp on the couch.

 

The pair panted down the line to each other, catching their breaths and waiting to come down from the high. Tig hit the ground first and used his free hand to tuck himself away. He glanced around and was thankful that no one was watching him, all too busy with their own entertainment. Almost everyone. He felt Clay’s gaze burning into him without looking. But he ignored it. He wasn’t going to let Clay get to him any more, he’d decided. If Clay suddenly had a probably with him fucking a guy, then tough shit. Clay had known about his preferences for years, he had no right to be acting like a fucking bastard now. And if he couldn’t take it, then…well, Tig would just have to face that bridge when they came to it.

 

“That was fucking brilliant.”

“Hmmm.”

“How was the blowjob?”

“Not as good as yours.”

Kozik chuckled. _“I remember a time you didn’t like them all that much.”_

“Yeah, well…that was before I had you properly trained.”

“Right, course. - Are you really going to follow through on what you said?”

“Huh?”

“The whole tying me to the bed and fucking me senseless promise.”

“Sure.” Tig grinned. “Just as soon as I get home.”

 

Kozik was silent for a long minute and Tig could almost see him cleaning himself up with a wide grin on his face. _“When will you be home?”_ Kozik asked; his voice softening.

Tig glanced over at the Clay and Jax, who were sat in a corner talking, or maybe arguing, it was hard to tell these days. “A couple of days if everything goes to plan.”

Kozik sighed. _“Good. I mis….I’ll see you then.”_

Tig swallowed the lump that had suddenly appeared in his throat. “Yeah…..me to.” he said before he could stop himself, grateful that none of the others could see or hear him. He really was turning into a chick.

“Call me if you want to…..talk.”

“Will do. But I don’t think I’ll need another ‘talk’ until I get back.”

Kozik laughed. A shallow, almost empty sound. _“Alright. Well, I’m going to crash.”_ he left a long drawn out silence before finally adding. _“Night Tiggy.”_

“Night Moron.”

There was another long pause and then utter silence as the line went dead. Tig lifted the phone from his ear and stared down at it for a bit before putting it back in his pocket.

 

The rest of the night dragged by. Tig stretched himself out on the couch and closed his eyes, falling happily into the abyss of sleep.

 

 

 

~~Can’t Get Rid of You~~

 

 

 

It was five in the morning; the sun was barely up, unlike Kozik. He’d been awake half an hour and taken a shower, checked his bags and had breakfast. Now he sat on the edge of the bed, fully dressed pulling his boots on. Behind him Tig lay staring up at the ceiling, one arm behind his head, the bed sheets barely covering his naked form. He watched the blond out of the corner of his eyes, frustration eating away at his insides.

 

“You know if I didn’t know better I’d say Clay was doing this on purpose.” Tig grumbled; his throat still rough from sleep.

Kozik turned a questioning look on the slightly older man.

“Sending you on all these runs. It’s almost like he wants you out of the way.” Tig reached for his cigarette packet.

“You think he’s trying to keep us apart?” Kozik frowned.

Tig ran a hand down his face and heaved a heavy sigh, scratching at the night’s growth on his jaw. “I don’t know. But he could send someone else for a fucking change. Chibs, Opie. - Hell it wouldn’t kill Jax to go once in a fucking while.”

“Opie’s just got married; Jax has spent a year and a half away from his family…”

“Hey, we weren’t exactly sunning ourselves in Bermuda.” Tig snapped, glaring at his lover.

“We don’t have kids.”

“Fine, what about Chibs? - Clay could send Chibs. - He could send him and Juice, and keep you here.”

Kozik had no reply for that. Chibs really could go in his stead. He turned his attention back to his boots. “I guess it just makes sense for me and Happy to go. - You know, us being the toughest and all.” he said to the floor with a grin.

 

Only Tig wasn’t in the mood for jokes. The thing with Clay was really getting to him now. They’d barely gotten back from Tucson before the president was ordering Kozik out of town again. He’d at least given the guy a couple of days to rest, and they’d made the most of it. Tig had to admit, he’d even began openly flirting with Kozik just to piss Clay off. Maybe even trying to push him into saying something to his face. Instead Clay just locked himself in the chapel and ignored him.

 

“You think he’s got a problem with us?” Kozik asked, turning to watch Tig.

“I don’t know. I suppose he could just be having trouble readjusting, and with all this cartel bullshit.” Tig shrugged.

“Maybe it’s that. - Cause he was fine with us before.”

Tig glared at him. “Fine? Have all those drugs screwed up your memory; he was far from fine with us.”

“He didn’t kick me out.”

Tig sighed. That was true. “That doesn’t mean he was cool with it. - But it was ten years ago. People change. Maybe now, he’s even less fine with it.”

“Now we’re living together, everyone at the club knows what’s going on with us. It’s not an open secret anymore.” Kozik added thoughtfully.

“Exactly.”

 

Kozik bit back a smile at Tig acknowledgement to their living arrangements. “If you’re that worried, why don’t you talk to him? He’s your best friend after all.”

“Is he?” Tig murmured more to himself that to Kozik. “I can’t and you know it. I’d sound like some fucking whiney old lady.”

Kozik snorted a laugh at the through and received a kick to the ribs for his trouble.

“Then I guess your just going to have to put up and shut up.” Kozik smirked, getting to his feet and shrugging on his cut. “And just keep in mind its doing wonders for our sex life.”

Tig gave him a narrowed glare.

“I got to go.” Kozik whispered, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to Tig’s lips. When he pulled back the man was staring at him.

“Did you just fucking kiss me goodbye?”

Kozik swallowed hard. “Uh, I…sorry. Instinct. Didn’t mean to….”

Before he could finish what he was saying Tig’s fingers were gripping tight to his hair, yanking him down into a hot open mouthed kiss. It only lasted a few moments before Kozik was pulling away.

“If you’re going to start kissing me goodbye, at least fucking do it right. Pussy.” Tig said with a grin.

Kozik was more than tempted to kiss him again just to show him how right he could do it, but instead straightened up, walked over to the dresser and grabbed his gun and knife, before heading for the door. “I’ll call you tonight.” when Tig gave him a nod of agreement, he walked out of the room.

 

“Hey moron.” Tig yelled after him.

Kozik’s head popped back around the door. “What?”

“Ride safe.” he said with a sharp nod.

“Always.” Kozik smiled, and left.

 

Tig lay on the bed alone, listening to the sound of Kozik’s engine starting up and pulling away from the house. Completely convinced that Clay was sending him away on purpose.

 

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

“Everything okay?”

Tig leant back against the side of the warehouse, a cigarette between his fingers. “Not really. Shit’s hit the fan.” he glanced back to where everyone was standing.

“Why what’s happened?”

“A bricks missing.” Tig sighed warily. “That’s why I’m calling. Jax wants Happy back here. ASAP.”

“Hey, Hap! V.P wants you back in Charming, like yesterday! - He’s hitting the road now. Any idea who took it?”

Tig shook his head even though there was no way Kozik could see him. “Not a Goddamn clue. My money’s on one of the Mayans.”

“It has to be. Can’t be one of ours.”

 

“How’s everything else?”

Tig took a long draw on his cigarette before answering. “Stressful.”

“You talk to Clay?”

Tig’s gaze shifted to the barn. “What do you think?”

“Is he still being weird?”

Tig grunted an answer, stabbing out the bud with his toe. There was a long silence where the pair just listened to each other breathing.

 

“How’s things up there? - Enjoying yourself?”

Kozik groaned. _“Hardly. I left Tacoma for a reason you know.”_

“Yeah. - You seen her?”

Kozik was quiet for a long few seconds before letting out a long breath. _“Yeah. Bumped into her in town.”_

“Huh. - And?”

“And….it was awkward.”

“I bet.”

“She asked if I planned on coming back at any point. And if I was seeing anyone?”

“And you said?”

“I told her the truth. That my place was in Charming now. - And yes I was. I didn’t go into details. She doesn’t need to know that.”

Tig grunted.

“She figured it was you through. I mean not you, you. She doesn’t know your name or anything. She just asked if it was **‘just that good’**.”

Tig felt his stomach tightened at the reminder of Kozik’s tattoo. He couldn’t help the cocky self-assured smile that spread across his face.

“You’re grinning aren’t you?”

“What do you think?”

“I think you’re a jerk.”

“But you love me anyway.”

“Good thing I do.”

 

There was a sudden awkward silence as the revelation settled between them like a lead weight. Tig swallowed hard three or four times but couldn’t quite get the lump to shift from his throat. The discomfort was broken by his cell beeping indicating another call coming through.

“I’ve got a call waiting, I’ll call you later.”

“Tig, I….”

“Later.”

Tig cut the line before Kozik could say anything else. His head spinning as he hit the button as answered the other call.


	14. Chapter 14

Tig stared down at his mobile, then up across the garage to the club house. Dawn was sat talking with a couple of the prospects. It was great seeing his little girl again. One of them at least. Though he wasn’t too impressed with her decision to change her name. Dawn was a perfect acceptable name, unlike Margeaux, with an X. Now if Fawn had decided to change her name he wouldn’t blame her.

 

His stomach clenched as he thought about his other little girl. He couldn’t believe she was in such a bad way. He glanced down at his phone again. They’d get her straight; all it was going to take was one phone call. He just wasn’t sure he was ready to make it.

 

He was still reeling from that morning’s conversation. What he’d said was meant as a joke, he hadn’t even really been thinking about what he was saying. But Kozik’s reply had held a ring of truth about it and it threw him through a loop, cause as much as he was willing to accept that he was in a relationship, he wasn’t sure he was ready for it to suddenly have meaning.

 

“Daddy!”

He looked up and smiled as Dawn strolled over to him. “Hey sweetheart. - You okay?”

“Yeah. That Chuck guy is so weird.”

“What’s he do?” He growled protectively.

“Nothing.” Dawn rolled her eyes and sat down next to him on the swings.

 

They sat there for a moment in silence, before Dawn began to riffle through her back. Pulling out her phone. “You’ve got to see this.” holding out the mobile to Tig.

“What is it?”

“Fourth of July, 2000. You came down to see us and took us to the carnival. Fawn got sick after eating all that cotton candy. - Do you remember?”

Tig frowned down at the picture of him and his girls.

“No. Yes. No. - Maybe.” he smiled.

“Was I there for sure?”

Dawn chucked. “You were.”

Tig laughed. Clearly he’d been high, or he was just getting old. - No, he had to have been high.

“Lemonade!” Chuck yelled from the club house and the pair got up to go get some. Anything to distract him from calling Kozik.

 

“Tig.”

He turned to see Gemma and Bobby heading for him. “You go.” he whispered, pushing Dawn towards the club while he stopped to talk to the pair.

“I spoke to Colleen.” Gemma announced with a sigh.

“What?” Tig frowned.

“Fawn is fine.” Bobby continued. “She’s in Chicago with her boyfriend for two weeks.”

Tig’s stomach tightened, his dark brows pulling tight together.

“No bulimia.” Gemma added, shaking her head sympathetically. “Dawn’s playing you, sweetheart.”

Tig stared at them. He thinks he’d kinda already figured that out but hadn’t wanted to believe it. “Well, what does she want the 12 grand for?”

“Well, I don’t know. Why don’t you ask her?” Gemma replied, her hands on her hips.

 

“Maybe.” Tig murmured.

“You okay, Tig?” Bobby asked with a concerned frown.

“Yeah. Thanks.”

 

Tig turned and started off towards Dawn, who smiled innocently. He shouldn’t really be that surprised, after all she was his daughter. - And Colleen’s. They hadn’t exactly been the most honest of people. But it kinda hurt that she’d lied to him. That she’d thought she had to. If she wanted, or needed, the money she should have just said so. He would have given it to her. He’d give her and her sister anything. Didn’t they know that? Had he really been that bad a father that they didn’t know that.

 

Tig stopped beside her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders as he took the plastic cup of lemonade she handed him.

 

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

 

Tig was sat at the office table, staring at his phone once again. The idea of calling Kozik about the money had been a little easier when it had been about saving his little girl, now that he knew it was a con, that Dawn just wanted the money for whatever reason, he…he wasn’t sure what to do.

 

He rubbed at his temples, a pounding headache slowly taking hold. They’d had such a nice day together, chatting, laughing. It felt wonderful. He wanted this again, but if he refused to give Dawn the money she wanted, she’d probably never come back. He knew he shouldn’t be buying his kids love, but it wasn’t like he had anything else to offer. He’d never been there for her, for either of them. Not really.

 

Taking a deep breath he hit Kozik’s name and the phone began to ring. The man answered after only a single ring, like he’d been waiting for the call.

 _“Tig.”_ he said quickly, causing the sergeants heart to leap into his throat.

“Yeah.”

They were silent, uncomfortable for the first time ever. Kozik cleared his throat and spoke first.

“Listen about what I said, I didn’t….”

“I’m not calling about that.” Tig said, cutting him off.

There was silence again.

“Okay.”

 

Tig winced at the coldness in the other man’s voice. He hadn’t heard it like that since their blow-up over the vote a week or so ago. “I…Listen, I know….I need to borrow your cut of the cartel money.” he said in a rush.

“Huh?”

Tig could practically see the man’s face crumbling up.

“What for? Is something wrong?”

“My kid needs it. - She’s….”

 _“Sure.”_ Kozik cut him off in an instant.

“What?”

 _“I said sure. Take it. It’s not like I’m in desperate need for the pay out. - I don’t exactly have bills piling up.”_ he said.

Tig swallowed; his head dropping into his hand with a sigh. “I…Thanks.”

 _“Not a problem.”_ Kozik sighed. _“Is that all you wanted.”_

Tig winced again. “Uh, hum….okay so we need to talk, but I can’t now. I need to see to my kid.”

“Yeah. Right. - So, call me when you’re ready.”

 

Tig opened his mouth to agree only for the line to go dead on him. He slumped low in his chair and closed his eyes, rubbing at the bridge of his nose. Now he knew why he’d stopped doing relationship. There were just too many minefields, too much stress. Yet the idea of calling it quits never even crossed his mind. He simple pushed himself up out of the chair and headed for the door, planning to call Koz later and hash things out.

 

An hour later he was handing Dawn the cash, hugging her tight and kissing her goodbye.

 

 

 

 

~~Can’t Get Rid of You~~

 

 

 

 

Tig was as on the bed in his room at the club house. Things had turned to shit with the cartel. He still couldn’t believe Miles had stolen from them, he didn’t seem stupid enough to do something like that, but Juice had caught him, so obviously his judge of character was a little off.

 

He’d been avoiding making the phone call all evening; it wasn’t something he really wanted to talk about. He glanced over at the clock and groan when the 2:00 flash accusingly at him. He really should have called sooner, straight after Dawn had left would have been best, but he hadn’t wanted to get into it then. He didn’t really want to get into it now, but he knew if they didn’t it would just hang there until Kozik got back and it would be all awkward. And it was always easier to have these kinds of conversation over the phone.

 

Taking a breath and throwing back the last of his beer, he hit dial and waiting. Unlike his last call, Kozik didn’t answer after the first ring. In fact he didn’t answer for six. By the time the line picked up Tig’s jaw hurt.

“Hello?”

Tig frowned at the unfamiliar female voice. “Where’s Kozik?” he demanded.

“Oh, he’s….”

“Put him on.”

“Ben, Ben. You’re phone.”

 

Tig’s stomach tightened at the familiarity in the name, the hair on the back of his neck standing on end. That couldn’t have been a crow-eater, something in his gut told him that, which meant….he heard muffled sounded and then the very distinctive _“Oh shit.”_ Finally Kozik came on the line, his voice rough. _“Tig. Uh….”_ there were more muffled sounds and then a door closing.

Tig clenched his jaw tighter. His heart pounding in his chest. “What you doing?” he asked as casually as he could, despite already knowing the answer.

 _“I didn’t think you were going to call.”_ Kozik insisted, his voice rushed and echoing.

“Where are you?”

“Uh…I…In the bathroom.”

Tig glared at the dresser across from him like it had murdered his beloved grandmother. “Do I want to know why you’re hiding in a bathroom?”

There was a long drawn out silence.

 

“I didn’t think you were going to call.”

“Well I have, so you want to tell me who you’re fucking or should I make a guess?”

He heard Kozik swallowed hard. _“It’s….Tig it’s not….”_

“What it sounds like?” Tig frowned. “It wasn’t your ex that answered the phone?” He was more than a little surprised at the force behind his words. It wasn’t like they didn’t continue to sleep around. Hell a week ago Kozik had called him in the middle of having his dick sucked. But there was a big difference between a crow-eater and an ex-old lady. A very _big_ difference.

 _“Look, it’s nothing okay.”_ Kozik snapped, now sounding less guilty and more angry. _“I was drunk and pissed off and wanted to get laid, alright. It’s no big deal.”_

Tig’s hand tightened around the beer bottle, breathing heavy through his nose. “Well seeing as your busy I’ll let you get back to it.”

“No! Tig, come on. It’s just sex.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Fuck. You don’t have to; I can hear it in your voice. Just fucking yell or something, will you.”

“I have nothing to yell about.” Tig replied, his voice becoming harsher by the moment the angrier became . “I don’t know how many times I have to tell you I’m not your fucking old lady.” his voice rose. “You can fuck whoever you want. Just like I can. You have a good night.” he hung up instantly and flung the bottle across the room, where it shamed. “Fuck it.” he growled to himself.

 

He dropped his head into his hand and took a couple of sharp breaths. This had been what he hadn’t wanted. Getting into this shit. It was meant to have been easier with Kozik. They got each other; they didn’t do stupid shit like jealousy. Except that they did, they just usually covered it up with sex and fist fights. He raked his hand through his hair. No wonder Clay didn’t trust him any more. Didn’t respect him any more. He’d turned into a fucking chick.

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

Kozik dropped down heavily onto the toilet seat, his head in his hands. He’d fucked up, hugely. He wasn’t even sure what he’d been thinking if he was honest. Except he hadn’t been thinking. Tig distancing after their conversation that morning had knocked him back. He’d just wanted it not to feel so hard for a change. Then Bethany turned up, all sweetness and comfort, and he’d been too frustrated and maybe a little too stoned to turn her down. It had been like slipping back into a comfortable pair of shoes.

 

He’d known before Tig had even called that it had been wrong. For more reasons than just using the woman because he was pissed at his boyfriend. - Huh, Tig would love being called that. - But that had been another reason why it was wrong, because he was with someone else. Someone he actually cared about. Had cared about for ten year. - Hell, who was he kidding, he loved Tig. Always had, always would.

 

He knew the club had a weird way of dealing with relationships, weird rules. Prison rules, out of town rules. Sleeping around was fine as long as it wasn’t anything and it didn’t follow you home. But Kozik knew what the knot in his stomach meant. He’d cheated, because Beth wasn’t some random crow-eater, she was his ex. They’d been living together, practically on the verge of marriage. Except he hadn’t been able to lie to her or himself after seeing Tig again. So he’d broken it off and headed back to Charming. That’s what made it cheating.

 

“Ben? Is everything okay?” Beth called through the door.

Kozik cringed at her voice. “Its fine.” he replied harshly. Why couldn’t she have stayed away? He’d told her he was with someone else, but it hadn’t seemed to bother her. He’d obviously given her more credit than she deserved while they were together, because he never thought she’d go after someone else’s man.

“You sure?”

“I said I’m fine!” he picked the phone he’d dropped on the bathroom tiles up and hit the speed dial.

“Okay.” she said in a small voice.

 

Kozik couldn’t bring himself to care if he’d been too harsh. He was too busy trying to figure out how he was meant to fix his relationship. He listened to the line ring out, over and over. After a few minutes it went to voice mail and his stomach lurched.

 _“Leave a message.”_ Tig’s voice demanded.

“Tig, pick up, or call me back. Please Tiggy. We need to talk.” he let out a sigh and hung up. “Dammit Tig.”

 

He got to his feet and yanked open the door. Stepping out into the bedroom of the apartment he’d left a year and a half ago. His eyes fell on Beth, sat on the bed in his shirt watching him with curious eyes. He didn’t say anything as he picked up his jeans and stepped into them.

“Is everything alright?” she asked softly. “Is there trouble with the club?”

Kozik didn’t speak until his had his tee and socks on, then he glanced up at her and sighed. “No. The clubs fine. - My relationship is blown to hell though.”

Beth frowned. “What?”

Kozik shook his head. It hadn’t been said, but he knew that his and Tig’s thing was to be kept behind the clubs closed doors. No one outside Samcro was to know about it. “He’s kinda related to my new…girl.” he lied.

Beth’s eyes went wide. “Oh. I….But I thought…” she shrugged, glancing at her hands. “…there were rules about this sort of thing.”

“There are. - But if your dad had found out I was playing away with an ex while away on club business, would he really care about club rules?”

Beth looked even worst. “No. I guess not.” she sighed. “I’m sorry. - I guess I just hoped….” she trailed off.

“That you’d chance my mind.” he said harsher than he intended.

Beth shrugged.

 

Kozik inhaled slowly and sat on the end of the bed. “Listen I know we were good together. And I swear I did love you….just ….”

“Not as much as you love her.”

“I can’t explain it, Beth. We’re just….us. We fight and bitch, but we just kinda work.” He watched her for a few moments before reaching for his boots. “I should never have let this happen. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I should have known better.”

 

Kozik got to his feet and grabbed his cut. “I hope you find someone, Beth. You deserve it.”

“I hope you can fix things with your old lady.” Beth whispered apologetically.

Kozik couldn’t help the smirk. “Me too. - See ya, Beth.”

“Bye Ben.”


	15. Chapter 15

Kozik sat at the bar, his head in his hand. It had been two days and Tig still hadn’t answered his calls. He was more than tempted to head back to Charming to have it out with the man, except for the fact he had a shipment to wait for. So he did the only thing he could do, he waited and drank.

“Hey,”

Kozik turned to look at his old friend, Russell. “Hey.”

“Just heard from one of our boys in Charming. Some shits gone down at Samcro, Club got shot up. Thought you’d want to know.”

“”What? When?” Kozik asked, staring up at the other man with wide concerned eyes.

“Few hours ago. As far as I know, everyone’s fine.”

Kozik nodded. “I better just go check in.” he excused himself and headed for the back rooms, pulling his phone out of his pocket at he went. It rang out as usual.

“Leave a message.”

“Fuck it Tig, pick up. I want to know what’s happening. I’m giving you ten to call me back then I’m calling Chibs! You get me!” he snapped the phone closed and leant back against the wall, cursing the racing of his heart and the fear in his gut.

 

It was nine minutes before his phone rang. Kozik answered it like it was on fire. “Tig?”

“I’m fine. We’re all fine. - Call you later.”

“No! Don’t you dare hang up on me.”

There was silence. Kozik was sure he’d been ignored.

“I’ve got shit to do.”

Kozik released a deep painful breath. “Fine. - But your alright?”

“Fine.”

“Okay. - You better call me later. When you can talk. - We _need_ to talk.”

There was another long silence before Tig finally spoke. _“Sure.”_ then the line went dead.

 

Kozik dropped back against the wall and took a breath, waiting for his pound heart to calm down and his fear to subside. Sure that Tig was going to be the death of him.

 

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

 

Tig hung up the phone with a wary sigh. He knew he should have called Kozik straight away, he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. He wasn’t going to deny he was still pissed at the guy. At least he had enough shit to take his mind off him.

“You ready sweetheart?” Gemma asked as she met him at her car.

“Anytime you are.” he smiled.

 

They headed back to her place in silence and Tig helped her collect the stuff Gemma needed for the Fund-raiser.

“Hey, Gem. I’ll take that.”

“Thanks.”

“Hey, what happened to Chaney?” he asked, glancing at the birdcage and the new bird.

“Heart attack.”

“Oh. So who’s this?”

Gemma gave him a soft secret smile. “Clay. - Long story.”

 

“Hey, I’m not gonna let anything happen to you, Gem.”

“Peace of Mind.” she murmured. “Where you land with all this drug stuff?”

“I’m backing Clay.” Tig nodded.

“And Koz?”

Tig lowered his head, turning his attention to the box in front of him. “Him too.”

Gemma gave his a suspicious narrowed look, but ignored it. “You think he’s got it handled?”

“Much as I can tell. You know, he doesn’t tell that much to me anymore.” Tig sighed. “I’m mostly stuck doing bitch work.”

“Literally.” Gemma smirked.

“No. No. Watching you is a pleasure.”

Gemma stared at him with a serious hurt face. “I wasn’t talking about me.”

Tig sucked in a breath. “I…Hey you know I don’t…..”

“Chill Tiggy, just playing with ya.” Gemma laughed. “He loves you, Tig.”

 

Tig shot her a look, his brows raised.

“Wouldn’t trust anyone else to watch me.” she added.

Tig released the breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. “Yeah. Yeah.” he murmured, grabbing an armful of supplies.

 

Tig packed all the stuff in the back of Gemma’s car and slid into the passenger’s seat to wait for her. She got in a few moments later and they were on their way. It was five minutes before she pressed him about Kozik.

 

“So what’s going on with you and Koz?”

“Nothing. We’re good.”

Gemma glanced over at him. “When did you last talk to him?” she asked suspiciously.

“This morning.” Tig murmured, turning to look out of the car window. “Hey what you doing?” he snapped as the car swerved onto the side of the road and stopped.

Gemma turned in the seat to stare at him. “Alright, what’s going on?”

“Nothing’s going on. Don’t we have to get somewhere?”

“It can wait. I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what’s wrong.”

Tig huffed. “There’s nothing going on alright. We’re just…we’ve just had a bit of a blow up, it’s cool.”

Gemma looked at him unconvinced and turned in her seat, leaning back and pulling a cigarette out of her bag.

 

Tig groaned and rolled his eyes. “You really just gonna to make us sit here? Why, what does it even matter what’s going on with me and Koz?”

“Because you’re my friend and I know there’s something troubling you. Has been for days. So the sooner you tell me the sooner it’s forgotten.”

“God you’re relentless.” Tig sighed.

“It’s part of my charm.”

 

Tig stared out at the dirt. He really didn’t want to go into this with anyone, but if he had to talk, Gemma was probably the best person, she’d always been weirdly accepting of him and Kozik. “I called him.” he looked at her. “Don’t laugh.” he warned with a wave of a finger. “I called him a couple of nights ago, when Dawn left and….” he groaned at himself, turning to look out the window again. “A girl answered.”

“So?” Gemma frowned. “It’s not like you two don’t…..”

“His ex.” Tig clarified.

Gemma fell silent, watching her friend from the driver’s seat. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“And?”

“And nothing. I left him too it.”

“You hung up?”

“What was I meant to do, listen?”

Gemma shrugged. “Why do you even care? You know how things are when there away?”

“I know, _alright_. Out of town rule, I _know_.” he shook his head, raking a hand through his hair. “I just….I don’t know. I can’t explain it. It’s all so fucked up.”

 

Gemma was quite for a long moment. “Have you talked about it? Told him…”

“What?” Tig snapped, glaring at her. “What am I meant to tell him? That I don’t want him fucking anyone?” he snorted. “You know what I’d do if he tried that shit on me? - It was meant to be easier with Kozik, you know? None of that shit was meant to happen. We were supposed to just fuck and shoot and ride.” he groaned again, his head falling back against the headrest. “Now it’s all screwed up and I don’t know what I’m doing.”

 

Gemma brushed the back of her fingers down his face. “Oh Tiggy. Looks like it’s too late to avoid that shit.” she took a deep breath.

“What am I meant to do, Gem? I didn’t want this. - And Clay’s acting weird around me and I know it’s because of Kozik.”

Gemma frowned. “What? Sweetheart, it’s nothing to do with that. Clay’s just….he’s just stressed out with all this shit and the Cartel. You know he’d never push you away because of that. He’s known about you and Kozik for years, it’s never changed how he feels about you.”

Tig looked at her unconvinced. “Yeah.”

“Yeah. - And as for not wanting all this relationship shit, you should have thought of that ten years ago when you started it. Honey…” she sighed, squeezing his thigh. “there’s nothing wrong with loving him you know.”

Tig glared at her again. “I never….”

“Oh come on Tiggy, I’ve known you too long, you can’t fool me as easily as you can fool yourself. You’ve been in love with Kozik almost since the day you met him. And it freaked you out back then too. - That’s why you pushed him away after what happened to Missy.”

 

Tig sucked in a sharp breath. “I kicked him out of town because he got her killed!” he snapped.

“Did you really? You sure it wasn’t because losing her made you realise something you weren’t ready to deal with? - Honey I get its weird, with the club and shit. But believe me, it’s worth holding on. You might not get another chance.”

 

Gemma turned back to the steering wheel, flicking her cigarette out the window and started the engine. “And as for the scank, I have a skateboard you can use.”

Tig stared at her before burst into laughter.

 

 

 

 

~~Can’t Get Rid of You~~

 

 

 

 

It was late, Tig was still playing bodyguard to Gemma at her place, waiting for Clay to get back. He sat at the large dining table, slouched low in his seat while Gemma busied herself in the kitchen. Finally she strolled to the table and placed a mug of coffee in front of the man, and leant down to press a kiss to his cheek, a hand on his shoulder.

“I’m heading to bed, you know where everything is.”

Tig looked up at her with a small smile. “Yeah, thanks. Night Gem.”

“Night Tiggy.” she turned her back and headed for the back of the house, only to pause a few feet away and look back at him. “Call him. Tonight. Don’t let it go on too long Tiggy.” she smiled reassuringly.

Tig returned the smile nervously, giving her a nod. “Okay.”

Then she was leaving him alone.

 

Tig sat with in hand on the coffee mug and the other resting on his thigh as he stared into the black liquid. It took him a few minutes to make up his mind and pull out his phone. Now probably wasn’t the best time, Clay could be back any minute, but Gemma was right, he couldn’t leave it any longer. They had to talk about what was going on. Swallowing hard, he hit speed dial and waited. Unsurprisingly Kozik answered after the first ring, his voice anxious and rough. Tig could tell he hadn’t slept properly, that that realisation made his stomach cramp.

 _“Tiggy?”_ he asked breathless.

“Obviously.” Tig replied quietly, shifting in his seat to lean on the table. Running one hand through his hair and closing his eyes. “So I guess….” he inhaled a sharp breath before continuing. “We’re never having this conversation again. You hear me. This is it, so don’t expect us to start sharing when you get back.” He heard Kozik open his mouth to speak, and jumped in before he could say anything. “I was jealous alright. I know it’s fucking stupid and out of line of me, but I don’t want you fucking that woman, I don’t want you anywhere near her…” he sucked in another breath, pushing himself out of the chair and strolling over to the window. “I know there are rules, and it’s not like I’m your…..but I don’t like it alright!” Tig snapped; his fingers tightening around the phone. “In fact I fucking hate it. I hate knowing that you fucked someone else. Cause I didn’t fuck anyone, I haven’t fucked anyone else since you came back.” he almost choked on the revelation. He hadn’t even thought about it. Sure there’d been the blowjobs and hand jobs but nothing else. From the moment Kozik was back in his life he’s lost interest in fucking others.

 _“Tig?”_ Kozik whispered down the line.

Tig remained silent for a few more minutes, his head spinning.

“Tig?”

“So, that’s why I’ve been a little off.”

Kozik sucked in a breath and Tig heard him gearing up to speak and his heart began to race.

“And what you said, even though I know it was just you kidding around, it throw me, and alright it might have just freaked me the fuck out because we’re guys and that shits for chicks, but I think the reason it freaked me out was because….” he paused, his thundering heart stealing his breath for a few moments. He expected Kozik to jump in and fill the silence but all he heard was the man’s breathe travelling down the line. He almost thought he could feel it against his ear.

 

After a few moments, when he was able to drag just enough air into his lungs, he finished what he was saying. “Because I…kinda…you know. The same.” he grumbled, barely whispering the final words.

 

There was utter silence and his stomach began to crap. In a desperate need to distract himself he began pacing the room, the phone glued to his ear as his eyes scanned the walls and floors. He half expected Kozik to hang up, but he knew he wouldn’t. He wasn’t an idiot; he knew how the man felt about it. Kozik was just in shock, unsurprisingly. So he just waited.

 _“What have you taken?”_ Kozik finally asked; his voice harsh and rough, and disbelieving.

Tig pinched the bridge of his nose. “Nothing. I’m a hundred per cent clean and sober. - I just….we needed to have this out before….well, before I fucked it all up.”

More silence followed.

 

 _“So you actually….”_ Kozik didn’t finish the sentence; he’d known Tig long enough to know that saying the word would have him running for the hills. And he didn’t really need to hear them, not really. Because, well just knowing was enough. _“…I’m sorry. About Be.....about what happened. I hadn’t been thinking. It won’t happen again. I swear.”_

Tig’s breath caught in his throat. “I don’t….” he started to tell him he just didn’t want him sleeping with his ex, but he realised he didn’t want him sleeping with anyone. Now that that flood gate had been opened. “It’s cool. We’ll just forget it happened. - Unless you’ve decided….”

 _“Don’t even!”_ Kozik snapped. _“I came back to Charming for a reason, and it wasn’t to get away from Beth. - It was to be close to you. So no I haven’t decided to get back with her. - And it’s so not cool, but I can’t change it so I really do hope we can forget about it. Cause I swear it didn’t mean anything.”_

 

Tig was silence for a long moment, trying to get his mind to focus on one thing at a time despite it being filled to the brim with new information. In finally inhaled deeply, held his breath for a few seconds before letting it go. “It’s forgotten.” he murmured, turning and heading for his coffee. He lowered himself into the chair and felt his whole body relax. “So….” he took a sip of his cold coffee. “….how’s everything in Tacoma?”

 _“Boring.”_ Kozik replied easily, like they hadn’t just been having ‘The’ talk. _“The sooner that shipment comes in and I can get back there the better. I’m going stir crazy here on my own.”_

“Trust me, your better off up there.”

“Yeah. You want to fill me in.”

 

Tig spent the next twenty minutes filling Kozik in on the drug war they’d been pulled into, the club being shot up, the severed heads and Chuckie’s incident with the chilli. - Which Gemma had told him about earlier that evening. - until he heard the lock in the door. He turned to glance over his shoulder as Clay strolled in looking wary and broken.

“Got to go. Call you later.”

“Alright. Later.”

Tig hung up the phone and got to his feet, meeting Clay half way from the door. “You okay.”

 

Clay stared at him for a few moments, his jaw clenched tight before giving him a harsh nod and brushing past him. “You can head home. See you at nine at the club.”

Tig stared after him for a few, then ripped his cut off the back of the chair and headed for the door, not even bothering to call back a goodnight.


	16. Chapter 16

“I’ll be home it a couple hours.”

Tig sighed as he let his head fall against the pillow, glancing over at the cold empty space beside him. “Can’t wait.”

“Me neither. - How’s Tara doing?”

“As well as can be expected.”

“Well, I better be going. I’ll see you soon, Tiggy.”

“Yeah.”

 

There was a long pause where words weren’t spoken aloud, before Kozik hung up and Tig dropped the phone and closed his eyes. Being woken up by Kozik for a stint of morning phone sex wasn’t as good as having the guy actually there to get him off, but beggars can’t be choosers, so what could he do? Tig lay there basking in the after glow for a while, before rolling out of bed and heading for the shower. In a few hours Kozik was going to be home, and they could make up for lost time. Tig was already determined to put his foot down if Clay tries to send him away again. He could send Opie next time, it’s not like the guy has an old lady anymore and he’d probably be grateful for the time away.

 

Tig showered quickly, dressed and headed for the club. His whole body was buzzing with frustration, and the need to see Kozik. He kept glancing at his watch. Only a few hours and he’d be home.

 

It was almost ten when Clay strolled into the club house, his face battered and bruised. Tig’s insides clenched tight at the sight. Clay dropped down on a stool and poured himself a cup of coffee.

“Kozik got there with the guns.” Tig informed his friend. “I talked to Jax, he’s gonna meet us at the warehouse.”

“Okay.”

Tig watched his friend. He really missed how close they’d been. He missed knowing that Clay would tell him everything. “You get into it with Gemma?” he murmured, hoping to draw the old Clay out.

“You don’t need to know.” Clay replied harshly, getting up from the bar and heading to a table.

Tig clenched his jaw. “And what do I need to know, Clay?”

“I ain’t gonna talk to you about my old lady.”

“You don’t wanna talk about nothing no more.” Tig insisted. “Ever since we got out, man. I mean, you cut me off. I got no idea what’s going on with you.”

“Jesus Christ. You and fat Elvis!” Clay snapped. “Couple of chicks.”

Tig’s gut clenched at the look Clay shot him and he marched around the bar to confront his friend.

“I marry you too?” Clay added sarcastically.

“Yeah. Sort of. You did. Because I’m the guy at your side, steps between you and the shit that tries to kill you. I’m your right hand, Clay.” Tig snapped, finally having enough of his friend bullshit.

“What do you want; a pat on the back every time you climb on your Dyna? It don’t work like that around her, pal.”

Tig glared at his old friend. “Oh. You know why you’re losing this club? Do you? Ain’t because of the drugs. It’s because you crawl in there and you shut those doors and you lock all of us out.”

Clay huffed, turning his gaze away angrily. “Don’t you have shit to do?”

 

Tig watched. “And I know what you’re problem is with me.”

Clay shot him a side ways look.

“It’s Kozik. You can’t deal with me and him. That’s why you keep sending him away. And why you’re pushing me out.”

Clay meet his friends gaze full on. “You know. You’re right. I don’t like it.”

Tig straightened his spine, lifting his chin.

“I told you ten years ago it was going to cause problems, and I was right. It’s going to end badly and we’re going to have to clean up your shit again.”

Tig swallowed. “Then why let him back in?”

“I didn’t.” Clay murmured. “He patched in while we were inside, remember.”

“You could have put a stop to it.”

Clay shook his head. “We need him out here, looking after the club. Unlike you, and the others, I put the needs of the club first.” Clay pushed back his chair and got to his feet. “We’d better get to the warehouse.”

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

The moment Tig saw Kozik stroll through the warehouse door next to Clay; he felt heart skip and his blood race. The blond smiled at him goofily as he headed over to him. It took all of Tig’s self control not to grab the moron and kiss him, instead settling for the usually hug. His arms wrapping tight around the other man’s shoulders. He could feel Clay’s eyes on them; watching, judging, but he ignored it. He didn’t care what Clay thought. He’d already give the man too much of himself over the years, it was time to have something of his own and damn the club.

“Hey. Missed you.” Kozik whispered before pulling back. He looks into Tig’s eyes for a long moment before turning to talk to Clay and the others. Tig resting his forearm on the man’s shoulder.

“Talked to Seamus. They’re all coming. The west table: Rourke, Galen and Leary. They’re worried about the Cartel, Clay. This rival beef.”

Everyone’s head turned as Jax marched in. “Hey.”

Tig did absolutely not want to grab hold of Kozik possessively as he moved to greet the VP.

“Good to see you.”

“You too, man. How’s Tara doing?” Kozik said, hugging the VP in a very bro like manner.

“She’s getting through it, thanks.” Jax replied with a smile. “Give me a minute?” he said, turning to Clay.

 

As Jax and Clay strolled out of the warehouse everyone started chatting idly, awaiting their return. Kozik turned. “You okay?” he frowned, looking at Tig with concern.

“Fine?”

Kozik took a small step forward and dropped his voice a little. “Tiggy?”

“I’m fine, really. Just haven’t been sleeping well.” he gave the younger man a meaningful look.

Kozik smirked a little, shifting his body to block the view of his Tacoma brothers, and settling his hand in the belt of Tig’s jeans. “That we can fix.”

Tig’s eyes became heavy with want. It had been too long and all he wanted was to crawl up on a warm bed with a strong warm body and forget all the shit that’s gone down over the last couple of weeks. “Can’t come soon enough.” Tig murmured quietly.

Kozik’s hand slipped a little lower to grip the sergeant through his jean, chuckling at the pathetic attempt Tig made to keep quiet in front of their guests.

“You’re going to pay for that.” Tig growled, narrowing his eyes.

Kozik didn’t say anything, just pulled his hand back and turned as Clay and Jax marched back in and they got down to business.

 

“Well now all we have to do is wait for the call.” Clay announced.

“In the mean time, Kozik, why don’t you take a couple of hours?” Jax announced; ignoring the glare Clay was sending his way.

“Huh…” Kozik frowned, looking from the VP to the President. “…Thanks. If you’re sure you don’t.”

“It’s fine.” he nodded.

Kozik turned to glance at Tig before he headed for the door and his bike. Tig watched him go with a heavy heart, his gaze flickering to Clay.

“Oh, Tig.” Jax said after a few minutes, as if suddenly remembering something. “Gemma, wanted you to drop by the house.” he added, sending the sergeant a silent message that told him there was no such request from Gemma, only a leave of absence from the VP.

Tig nodded and marched out after Kozik, not even bothering to give Clay as second glance.

 

“What do you think you’re doing?” Clay whispered harshly to Jax.

Jax just glared at him with a silent fury before excusing himself with the excuse of going to visit Tara and leaving a furious Clay behind him.

 

 

 

~~Can’t Get Rid of You~~

 

 

 

Tig had expected hot and heavy passion upon entering his house with Kozik. They’d been apart for almost two weeks; they’d had a long distance argument, so he’d expected the make-up sex. He’d expected one to be roughly throwing the other against the nearest surface and the ripping of clothes.

 

He had _not_ expected the calm and quiet. They strolled into the house in silence, Kozik heading straight for the kitchen and beer while Tig casually shrugged out of his cut and slouched low on the couch. His head falling back with a wary groan, his arm dropping to cover his eyes.

“Hard day?” Kozik asked softly.

Tig’s peeked out from under his arm, staring at his lover as the man stood in the doorway of the kitchen cradling two beers. His shoulder pressed against the wooden frame as he watched him. “You have no idea.” he grumbled. He dropped his arm and sat up straight, watching Kozik walk slowly towards him, bottle out stretched. “Had it out with Clay this morning.” he sighed, staring at the unopened bottle. “I was right. - He’s not okay with this.”

 

Kozik dropped down beside him, his eyes fixed on the older man. “Oh. - So he has been sending me to keep us apart?” he asked. He hadn’t really believed Tig accusations against their club president. It hurt to know he’d been right all along if he was honest. - It hurt more to see what it was doing to Tig. He reached out and ran his fingers through the man’s dark hair. “Does he want us to stop?” he asked nervously, his heart pounding with fear.

 

Tig’s head snapped around to fix the other man with a stern look, his cheek brushing against the inside of Kozik’s wrist. “I don’t give a fuck what he wants. He can’t handle this, that’s his shit. And that goes for everyone else.”

Kozik smiled. “So your not dumping me then?” he said lightly, though his heart was still racing from the fear that had been coursing through him a few seconds ago.

“I fucking should, after that stunt with….” he couldn’t bring himself to say her name and he didn’t really need to.

“I said….”

“Shut up.” Tig huffed.

 

“…Look…” Tig settled his beer on the table, he shifted forward to lean on his knees, separating his hair from Kozik’s warm fingers. He stared down at his feet and hands. “We want this, we want the club to accept it and treat us like anyone else. Then that means we have to follow the same rules.” he said in a rough anxious voice. “That means out of towners and all. - I can‘t bitch at you for doing what we all do.”

Kozik shifted forward. “You really want that?” he asked quietly.

Tig shrugged, reaching for his bottle and opening it, gulping down half in a few seconds. He was panting when he pulled the bottle from his lips. “It’s what it is.”

Kozik stared silently at the bottle. “You know it’s not like a command right?” he said firmly. “It’s not like we have to fuck someone while you’re away. Not everyone does. It’s not an actual rule. It’s just that if you do, I….neither of us can bitch about it.”

Tig glanced over his shoulder with a raised brow.

 

“But what happens in the club and what happens here are two very different things, Tiggy. We can’t start flinging our personal shit around in front of the others, but that doesn’t mean you have to let me off just to keep the peace. I fucked up. I slept with someone else, someone who wasn’t just some random nameless crow-eater. What I did wasn’t an out of towner, it was….it was worse. We both know that and you have every right to be pissed at me about it. To yell. - And hell, you could even hit me if it makes you feel better. I totally deserve it. This is our home, what goes on here has nothing to do with the club and the rules.”

 

Tig stared at him over his shoulder then pushed himself to his feet and paced the room silently. Kozik watched him move, watched his face shift through a myriad of emotions. None of them good. When Tig stopped suddenly and turned to fix him with a hard unforgiving stare he braced himself for the fall out.

 

“What the fucking hell where you thinking!” Tig yelled, his bottle flying into the wall to his right.

“I wasn’t.” Kozik murmured, dropping his gaze. Feeling strangely more at ease with the man’s anger than his acceptance and forgiveness.

“Obviously. Fuck it Kozik! Jesus!” Tig dragged a hand through his hair. “I should fucking kill you! - Why the fucking hell did you drag me back into this if you were only going to fucking cheat!”

Kozik’s eyes lifted to stare at Tig. “ _I_ dragged _you_?” he scoffed. “Excuse me but I think you’ll find you marched into _my_ fucking room and stuck your fucking tongue down _my_ throat!” he defended forcefully.

Tig narrowed his gaze. “You were baiting me. You fucking know you were. - You’d been pushing me for the whole fucking week. Waiting for me to break.”

Kozik smirked despite himself. “And if I was?”

“Why? If you were only going….” his face fell and anger, pure fury flooded in. “Oh fuck!” he yelled turning and slamming his fist into the fire place wall. “…you fucking used me to get back in! God I knew it! - Just like the first time.”

“Hey, hold the hell up there.” Kozik snapped, leaping to his feet and marching around to stand in front of the older man. “I never fucking used you for anything. _Ever_. Not when I came back and not when I was a prospect. You _used_ me; you used the weight of your position in the club to get me to do whatever you wanted me to. _Remember_. So don’t fucking stand there acting like the fucking innocent wounded party in this!”

“Excuse me fucker but you’re the bastard that cheated!”

“Yeah, you know what, I did. And I hate myself because of it. Because it shouldn’t have happened. It wasn’t fair on Beth….Or on you. But you know what, I wasn’t in my right mind at the time. I’d slipped up and told you that I loved you and like the fucking bastard you are you cut me off. For all I knew you were kicking me to the damn curb!”

Tig grunted threateningly. “So your first reaction was to go fuck some bitch.”

 

Kozik’s fist connected with the side of Tig’s face, the force making him stumble. “Watch your mouth, Tig.” he warned, his finger pointing into the man’s face.

Tig spat out a small clot of blood onto the carpet. “Defending your whore’s honour, how sweet.”

 

Kozik gripped the man by his shirt and slammed his back into the fireplace. “I’m warning you Tig. Beth isn’t to blame for this, _you_ are. - _I_ am. If you want to hate someone, hate me, but leave her out of it.”

Tig snarled. “Not to blame? Innocent?” he laughed harshly. “She knew you were with someone else. You told her and she went after you anyway. Yeah, real innocent.”

 

Kozik swallowed hard, narrowing his blue eyes at the man. “What the fuck are you, a god damn teenage girl? Shit happens. She hit on me, yes, because _she_ actually cares about me and wanted me back. I could have walked away though but I didn’t. Because I wanted it. I _wanted_ to actually feel like I wasn’t just a convenient fuck. I wanted…for once…it to be more than _just sex_.”

 

Tig’s lips drew into a thin line, Kozik‘s words hitting him like a psychical punch. “Convenient?” he grunted, shoving Kozik roughly away before swing at his jaw. “Convenient!” he yelled as the blond stumbled slightly. “You’ve _never_ been fucking convenient! All you’ve ever fucking done since the day you arrived was screw my damn fucking life up!”

 

Kozik rubbed his jaw and stared at the man. His heart pounding painfully against his ribs and he hated that there were tears pooling behind his eyes.

 

“I was happy, I fucked who I wanted, when I wanted. No emotions. No shit come back. Just sex. I’d had enough stupid emotional shit with my damn ex-wife, I didn’t want that again. Didn’t want the hassle. - Then you fucking screwed me up! Even when you’re not around you’re always in the back of my fucking head, telling me that there’s more than just nameless fucks and bathroom blowjobs. _Jesus_!” he turned, slamming his fist onto the mantelpiece, his head hanging as he took deep breaths. A strange haunting silence falling in the room. “It killed me losing Missy, not because she was my baby girl, not because she was a doppy bitch who made me….us happy, but because she was ours.” he murmured to the wall. “And when I lost her, I lost you.”

“You kicked me out of town.” Kozik murmured. “I left because you threatened to kill me.”

 

Tig’s grip tightened on the polished wood, his knuckles turning white. His chest heaving as he fought to breathe and speak. “That’s….I got scared. I freaked out.” he murmured. “It could have been you. Hanging from that gate and the fear I felt at realizing that….I didn’t want it. It’s not what we were.”

Kozik frowned. “Are you saying you kicked me out of Charming because you didn’t want to face losing me?” he asked cautiously.

Tig didn’t reply, his silently stood there with his head hanging.

 

Kozik stared at the man’s back, watching the slump of his shoulders, unsure just what he was hearing. He inhales sharply as he realized what the older man was saying. Something he’d never thought he would ever say. He stepped forward, his hand out stretched only to paused. He wasn’t going to push this. Tig wasn’t ready for anymore open heart confessions right now. They had time. He smiled softly at that. They had all the time in the world.

 

Taking a calming breath, Kozik headed back to the couch and dropped down with a quiet huff and a groan of ancient springs. Giving Tig the time he needed to calm himself down. It took a few moments before Tig’s back straightened and he turned to stare at Kozik.

“Just…don’t do it again.” Tig said firmly, his eyes locked with Kozik’s. The tension evaporating immediately.

Kozik shook his head. “Wasn’t planning on it Tiggy.” he smiled softly. There was another long silence before Kozik’s face slip into a wider, goofier smile. “After all, no girl in the world can get me off the way you can.”

Tig narrowed his eyes as he stalked slowly towards the sitting man. “I should fucking well hope not.” he growled, wrapping his fingers into Kozik’s short blond strands and yanking his head back, their mouths crush together.


	17. Chapter 17

Tig rolled over onto his back, sweat freckling his skin. Kozik panting beside him with a grin the length of the Mississippi across his face. Tig rolled his eyes as he reached for his cigarettes. Yanking one from the packet and sparking it up. He took a couple of puffs before handing it to Kozik.

 

“I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. We really should fight more often.” Kozik laughed around a puff of smoke.

“More often? We’ve practically been fighting our entire relationship. How much more often do you want?”

Kozik shifted up the bed, his foot braced against the mattress. He turned onto his side slightly, pressing the tip of the cigarette to Tig’s lips. “I’m sure we could find a way to fight more.” he smirked, pulling the cigarette away and replacing it with his lips. His tongue swirling around Tig’s as he inhaled the man’s smoke. He pulled away and released it into the air.

“You’re probably right.” Tig laughed.

 

They lay there in silence, Tig’s body pressed pathetically close to Kozik’s side. The cigarette passing between them.

“So…” Kozik sighed. “How do you think this shit with the Cartel’s going to go down?”

Tig groaned. “Honestly…” he sighed. “…I think Bobby’s right. It’s going to end bloody for all of us.”

Kozik looked down at the older man. “You regretting siding with Clay?”

Tig didn’t answer.

“You think Clay will continue to keep us apart?” Kozik asked. His fingers playing aimlessly with his lover’s hair.

“I think he’ll try. - But I’m not taking his shit anymore. Not when it comes to this.” he said firmly.

Kozik nodded and glanced over at the clock. “We’ll have to head back to the club house soon.”

Tig groaned, burying his head into Kozik’s side, causing the man to chuckle.

“You really have turned into a teenage girl.”

“Blow me, princess.” Tig snapped.

 

Kozik laughed as he used his weight to force Tig onto his back once more, before bracing himself over the man. Smirking wickedly. “If you insist sire.” he laughed. Dragging his tongue over the man’s chest and abdomen before wrapping his lips around the throbbing length. It still tasted of the lubricate they’d used only a few minutes ago. Kozik pulled back for a minute, looking up at Tig with a shit-eating grin. “Okay, so either you’ve found the fountain of youth, or you really did see Tara about those blue pill.”

 

Tig clenched his jaw and wrapped his fingers into Kozik’s hair as the man laughed, forcing him back to work. His hand keeping his head in place as he fucked up into the warm moist mouth. Grinning when he hit the back of Kozik’s throat and the man didn’t even flinch.

 

He was so close to his climax when the phone started to ring on the nightstand that his hand tightened in Kozik’s hair to keep him from stopping as the other reached for the phone. He didn’t even check the caller ID.

“What?” he snapped harshly, his voice heavy with desire.

 _“Tig?”_ Juice’s voice asked down the line.

“Yeah….ahhh…ahhh…fuck…shit…h-harder!” he panted, his hips snapping forward faster.

 _“Shit, not again. Jesus man.”_ Juice groaned.

“You phone me pri….ahhh Jesus yes….ahhh…wha…what you…?”

“Chapel. An hour. Jax wants everyone there.”

“An ho…ohhhh…hour? Fine.” he smirked. “Yeah, moron, we’ve got an…” he panted. “Hour. I get to fuck you tight ass…ahhhh…at least another….five times.”

 _“Jesus man!”_ Juice yelled, hanging up on them.

Tig dropped the phone, laughing and moaning. His head rolling back against the pillow and he shot his load straight down Kozik’s throat. The man pulled back, tilted his head. Tig watched with heavy eyes as the blonds throat moved to swallow every last drop.

 

Kozik dropped down next to him, panting. “Was that….a promise or a wide up?” he asked breathlessly.

“It was Juice.” Tig chuckled, and so did Kozik. “But with an hour to spare, I’m sure we can try to make it a promise.”

Kozik turned to stare at him with a raised brow. “Seriously, did you speak to Tara?”

“Fuck you.”

“Where’s the pills and we can get on with doing just that.”

Tig swung for him, slamming his fist into the man’s ribs. Kozik quickly gripped his wrist in a vice grip and used it to force Tig over onto his stomach. His chest pressing against the man’s back and his lips at his ear.

“How about I fuck you and we’ll see about fucking me after.” he whispered.

Tig glanced over his shoulder at him. “Sounds like a plan.”

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

Forty five minutes later the pair were dragging themselves reluctantly out of bed and into the shower, though thankfully after forty minutes of rigorous make-up sex and blow-jobs, neither man had recovered enough for shower sex too. So they washed away the sweat, lube and cum, then got dressed, talking casually about club business, whether they should maybe think about getting another dog, and what to have for dinner. - Other than more sex. Then left the house feeling relaxed and at ease. They climbed onto their bikes. Kozik’s backside complaining at the sudden pressure after such harsh treatment, and then they headed off to the club house.

 

They arrive to find everyone gathered. Juice sent Tig a murderous look for making him listen to them fucking again, he’d obviously complained to Chibs because the man took one look at them then Juice and burst into laughter. Bobby informed them that Jax had met with the Cuban’s about Tara’s attack and had called the chapel met.

 

Tig and Kozik got themselves drinks and settled onto the couch to wait for Jax and Clay to arrive and get the meeting started. The pair strolled in a few minutes later and led the way to church.

 

“This Galindo deal. It’s already spilled too much blood.” Jax said from the corner of the room. “I don’t expect you guys to take that risk. Going after these Lobos is about Tara. It’s my shit. I’m gonna handle it.”

“This ain’t just about Tara, brother.” Tig insisted. “This is about hurting those assholes that shot up our clubhouse and killed Armando.”

“Jax is right.” Clay sighed. “This Cartel run’s turned into one bloody ride. Nobody saw it coming, including me.”

Tig’s eyes turned to Bobby. He’d seen it. Him and Piney had known this was going to turn bad.

“But we’re in the homestretch now, bro.” Clay continued. “I say we close this door, we get back to business as usual.”

“I’m not letting you go into do this alone.” Bobby insisted, staring up supportively at Jax.

“Me neither.” Chibs agreed. “I’m in.”

“Yeah, me too.” Tig nodded. Glancing from Jax to Kozik.

“All right, let’s do it.” the blond said firmly.

“Yup. I’m there.” Happy agreed with his usual enthusiasm.

“What about you, Ope? You in?” Clay asked.

“Yeah. I’m in.”

“Okay.” Jax inhaled deeply, pulling out his chair and finally taking a seat.

 

 

 

~~Can’t Get Rid of You~~

 

 

 

Tig strolled back out of the club house, zipping up his hoodie over his cut, Bobby and Opie at his heel as the parade of Harley headed for the gate. He’d much rather be heading out with them to deal with the Mexican’s, but Clay wanted him to deal with Georgie, and as the good sergeant he was, he followed orders.

 

He flagged down Kozik as he passed. The blond pulling to a halt in front of him, his engine still running. Happy paused too, looking between them with a head shake and eye roll. Tig stepped forward, fully aware of the eye that were on him.

“Ride safe.” he murmured, as he always did when they were forced to take separate jobs.

“You too.” Kozik nodded with a grin and a nod.

There was a moment of silence as they pair just looked at each other, then Tig turned to head for his bike, Bobby and Opie already sat waiting for him.

 

“Hey Tiggy!” Kozik called as the older man took a few more steps.

Tig turned with a frown as Kozik waved him back. “What?” he grumbled; his hands on his hips.

 

He was surprised by the gloved hand that snapped out to grip the collar of his shirt and pulled him in, crushing their mouths together in an open wet kiss that held promise of more later. Tig drew back and glared at his lover, blue eyes narrow. “Oh, you’re so paying for that, fucker.”

“Should hope so too.” Kozik smirked wickedly, his eyes gleaming.

“If you two are finished. Can we go?” Happy remarked with a huff.

Kozik nodded and shifted his weight on this Harley. “Later, Tinkerbelle.” he winked before shooting off out of the gate to catch up with the others.

 

Tig was still smiling when he turned and headed for his bike, Bobby and Opie grinning like Cheshire cats.

“Oh, aren’t they adorable.” Bobby cooed with a laugh.

“Fuck you.” Tig snapped, throwing his leg over the sleek black machine.

“Yeah. Right little Burt and Ernie.”

Tig’s flipped the pair of them the finger and started his engine as they laughed at him. “Can we just get this fucking done with?”

“Yeah. - After all, you got dinner to make for your old man, right.”

Tig glared at the chuckling hippy. “Listen Elvis, if anyone’s the old man here, it’s me.” with that he pulled his Harley away from its parking space.

 

 

 

~Can't Get Rid of You~

 

 

 

The shit with Georgie didn’t take all that long; they were back at the club house after two hours, propping up the bar. Bobby had been quiet since they gotten back, losing himself in a bottle. Tig busied himself behind the bar; just too keep his mind of the need that was curling inside him. He felt ridiculous and pathetic, they’d only been apart for two hours and Tig felt like he was practically climbing the wall. Like he needed to see Kozik, make sure he was in one piece. He figured it was because they hadn’t had much time together since Kozik’s return to Charming. Club business just kept separating them. But he’d meant what he’d said to Kozik that morning. He wasn’t going to let Clay send him on another run, if it meant butting heads with his president then so be it.

 

He was in the men’s room when he heard the first growl of engines heading into the club car park and he’d never in a million years admit the joy that filled him, or the skip his heart made. And certainly not the way he practically ran from the small bathroom. Grabbing Kozik’s cut from the back of the chair he’d left it hanging from.

 

He had to dodge out of the way as Juice came barrelling past him, a broken look on his face. He wouldn’t meet Tig’s eyes and a knot tightened in the sergeant’s stomach as the boy vanished into the back of the club house. Tig looked up as the other strolled in, Chibs rushing after Juice, but not before pausing to look at Tig. He didn’t need to say the words; Tig read them in the man’s face. The sympathy, the guilt. It told him what he didn’t want to hear. Tig inhaled deeply, his fingers tightening around the cut in his hand and he gave the man a sharp nod of acknowledgement and then Chibs was gone, rushing after his boy.

 

Tig’s legs felt like jelly on the inside but he managed to make it to the bar, pouring himself a drink in silence as he lay the cut in front of him. As Jax finally strolled in. “Shit.” he whispered, running his hands over the battered leather, smoothing it out. “Did he go fast?” he asked, his heart pounding in his chest. His mind buzzing with shock. He felt numb, unable to think or realize just what it all meant.

“Yeah. He was dead before he felt it.” Jax replied, his eyes showing the sympathy he felt.

 

Tig nodded, turning back to stare down at the leather beneath his hand. His fingers absently brushing over the patch. He swallowed hard against the lump that was rising in his throat.

“Everyone else whole?” Bobby asked softly.

“Yeah.” Clay replied, marching around the bar to get himself a drink. “Cartel feud is squashed.”

Tig gently lifted Kozik’s cut, folding it, before putting it back on the bar and flattening it once more under his palm. His hand felt like that were trembling.

“Where we at with Georgie?” Clay asked.

 

Tig turned to his best friend, staring at him for a moment, sighing as he realized that’s really all Clay cared about. The damn club. He’d just lost the man he actually loved and all Clay was concerned with was his damn business deals.

“What?”

Tig fixed him with tired eyes. “Oswald was right….” he replied matter-of-factly. “The Asians, they’re onboard with Charming Heights. Georgie can’t stop it.”

 

Clay huffed, grabbing his drink and headed for the chapel. Not even waiting to raise a glass to a fallen brother. Tig watched him with angry eyes. Unable to believe that his best friend, the man he’d stood by for years, who he’d killed for, didn’t even have the common decency to give him a word or look of condolence.

 

Tig didn’t speak, didn’t think he’d be able to say his lovers name ever again. It even hurt to hear Jax say it as he raised a toast to him. He just stood numbly with his palms pressed to the man’s cut. He threw back his drink in toast, slamming the glass down on the bar with more force that was probably necessary. He could feel the other’s eyes on him. He didn’t want the sympathy or pity, he didn’t want to talk about Kozik, he didn’t want to be anywhere near them. Turning he grabbed a large full bottle of Jack and marched out of the club house. Eyes following him.

 

The garage had been close half an hour. Everyone having left and Tig was glad for it. He wanted to be alone but he couldn’t face going home. He pulled on the chains to close the metal shutters, plunging him into dim light, then he dropped down against the far wall and opened the bottle. He gulped down mouthful after mouthful, welcoming the burn along his throat. But it wasn’t that burn that was making his eyes fill with tears and he wouldn’t pretend it was. He’d lost Kozik. His friend, his brother, his lover. The only person who’d ever actually gotten beneath Tig’s skin to the point of almost being a part of him.

 

Tig pulled the bottle from his trembling lips, pressing the cold glass to his forehead as his body shook from the pain coursing through it. He felt like there were knifes ripping at his chest from the inside. He could feel each slice of the blade. His heart had stopped beating, he was sure of that. He couldn’t feel it’s movement, nor that of his lungs. When had he last taken a breath? He didn’t know. Tears streamed down his cheeks, staining his tanned aging flesh, before dropping to do the same to his leather. His hands were actually shaking now, so badly he couldn’t stop them. The garage echoed with the sound of his sobs, vibrating off the metal shutters and stone walls.

 

He knew this was punishment. God taking revenge for what he’d done to Donna, to Opie and his kids. Forcing him to feel what his brother felt when he’d lost the wife he loved so much. And Tig couldn’t blame him. He deserved that punishment, probably more to. He just wished it hadn’t been at the cost of Kozik’s life.

 

He wished the man had never come back to Charming. He should have stayed in Tacoma. Hell, better yet he should never have joined the Son’s in the first place. He should have stayed back with his brother, gotten married to his high school sweetheart and had two point five kids. And if Tig had had any sense ten years ago, he would have kicked him to the curb the day he rode into him.

 

Glass shattered against the metal shutter as Tig flung the bottle against it with a furious broken yell. This was all his fault. His and the clubs, and Clay’s. His eyes hardened on the empty space in front of him. It was all Clay’s fault. He’d gotten them into this. He’d gotten them involved in drugs and the Cartel. If it hadn’t have been for that Tara wouldn’t have been hurt and Jax wouldn’t have dragged them off to get revenge. He wouldn’t have gotten Kozik killed. Yes, this was all on Clay.

 

Tig stared into nothing, his heartbreak slowly being swallowed up by anger. He didn’t know how long he’d sat there, just staring and thinking and blaming. But when he finally dragged himself to his feet and out of the garage it was dark. He still felt numb, empty when he caught sight of Gemma, her face a battered mess. He marched over to her, touching her face. A fresh wave of shock flooding through him. “Gem? This was Clay.” it wasn’t a question.

“Not now, Tiggy.” she shook her head, her eyes as empty as his. She smiled softly up at him before heading for the office.

Tig stared at the club house. Not only had his so-called best friend gotten his lover killed, he’d also beaten the hell out of his old lady. A woman Tig loved. Clay wasn’t the man he knew anymore, wasn’t the friend and brother he loved. He was a stranger who was slowly destroying them all.

 

Tig walked calmly back into the club house, ignoring the looks from the remaining brothers who seemed to still be toasting Kozik. “Where’s Clay.” he asked in a harsh shallow tone.

“Back room.” Juice replied.

Tig nodded and walked towards the long corridor of rooms. He paused before he reached Clay’s room. Glancing down at the cut he wore. Slowly he drew his knife from his belt and pressed the tip into the threading of his Sergeant’s patch.

 

“What?” Clay snapped as Tig paused in the doorway.

Tig stared at him. He wanted to yell at him, hit him. Make him feel how Gemma felt. How he felt. But he did nothing, he just stepped slowly into the room. “Here.”

Clay turned to stare at him. His eyes fixed on the patch in Tig’s hand.

“You’re right.” Tig murmured. “This ain‘t the way it works.” then he turned and walked out of the room.

Tig marched out of the club house with the knowledge that he’d lost

everything he held dear in a single day. His friend, his patch but worst of all the man he loved.

 

 

~~Can’t Get Rid of You~~

 

 

Tig didn’t go home. He lost himself in drink and women. Finding anywhere that wasn’t the house he’d shared with Kozik to stay. He’d barely spoken to anyone at the club, especially not Clay. The man might have still been his president but he wasn’t his friend. Gemma tried to talk to him. Pass on her sympathies but he didn’t want to hear it. He didn’t care. He just let himself drown in anything but the pain Kozik’s loss brought him.

 

He’d thought he was broken, shattered. Completely this time. That there was nothing else for him to lose. Then Clay was shot and that’s when he discovered that he still had things’ left to lose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and reviews. I love you all. xxx
> 
> I hope to return to this universe at some point in the future in some form or another.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the short chapter, but I wanted to know what you guys thought, and well...I just couldn't wait to post. Will be posting as I go, so if you have to wait a bit between posts. forgive me.


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